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Mine was a doll almost as big as I was, who could walk if I held her hand. I don't remember what these dolls were called - maybe Baby Walks-a-Lot - there wasn't much creativity in doll names at the time
I can tell you after my first child, a horrific pregnancy (I HATE being pregnant I thought it was disgusting and I was sick till the day I had her) I vowed to never ever get pregnant or have another kid. I'm not a fan if infants and at the time we had my daughter my husband worked nights, so he was gone all night then slept all day I was beyond tired. My daughter is 3 1/2 now and it's great. We can do things with her, talk and she talks back etc. But I'd never put myself through the torture it was to get to this point
Terrifying events like the school shooting in CT, or disasters such as hurricanes or tornadoes give me anxiety about the future for my kids. All we want is to keep our kids safe, but events like this sure make you feel a strong sense of vulnerability. I wouldn't say it would make me not want children though...
A lot of things. The way the world is going, seeing out of control kids, and just the overall thought process of being able to be a good parent in a the first place.
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Of course my mom cursing me when I misbehaved, saying "I hope some day when you grow up you have two, just like you!" didn't help matters. But no - there was no "event" that turned me off having kids. I never wanted them. I never had them. I don't regret it, and now I'm peri-menapausal, and had my tubes tied 20 years ago, and hubby and I will be retiring to a retirement village (children welcome as temporary guests, but not allowed as residents), in less than 5 years, so having any kids is no longer an option.
Ha, I love this one, my mother said it to me all the time, along with "what goes around comes around, just you wait!" --- and well, the older two are 15 and 21 and the joke is on her. They are awesome and have been a joy, in no way anywhere the headaches me and my brother were for her. So pfffft to her little "curse".
As for the OP's question;
I always wanted kids. Used to want between four and six but that's now how it worked out. I would have to say that the nightmare we went through at the hands of Child Protective Services (related to DD's bio father, it's complicated) was definitely enough to make us both decide there would be no more children. The power a government agent has to destroy your child's life is pretty damned terrifying and I think if I'd been aware of all of that before I had kids it might have scared me off of having any at all.
It may sound melodramatic to someone who hasn't been there. That's okay. I genuinely hope you never have to understand where I am coming from!
A difficult childhood, And adulthood for a long time and the fact that I could not guarantee a child a 100% comfortable life. I did want them in my early 20's, But that changed as I got older. I do not hate the world but it's so nuts and unpredictable sometimes that I would be nervous 24/7 for them. I was left an orphan young. It was very hard. Spent my adult life working, Going to school for some of it and was always busy anyway (Usually still am.)
Back in the day I could take kids or leave them, but my first wife demanded them and I was dumb enough to cave to her.
I am an antinatalist in principle. I love my two children (now grown and well out of the nest) but I feel I did them no favors at all inserting them into existence. There are plenty of people in the world and I did the world no favors either.
Today my children, stepchildren and grandchildren generate an awful lot of drama that I could do without, even though they don't live with us. We have a couple of dogs that satisfy our need to take care of something. But young people generally won't listen to someone like me if I were to advise them not to have kids. The drive to reproduce is too primal, even for men. I would be happy if people would just bring more awareness to the process of having children, but even that is asking too much. My daughter's rationalization was "it was going to happen sooner or later anyway".
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