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Ha. Most of my encounters with children first off. Secondly, I'd have to be sure I was the best role model and ideal parent as I could be and in a stable happy relationship and financially stable. Not being so is a no no for having children. I am not ready at that stage in life yet being 25.
you could say i have few maternal instincts... yeah i liked babysitting, and was overjoyed when my only nephew was born, but really didn't want to have my own.. whether or not i would have been a good parent will never be manifest, i just always knew i never wanted to be a Mom.
guess if everyone felt like me the world's populace woud be zero zip zilch LOL!
you could say i have few maternal instincts... yeah i liked babysitting, and was overjoyed when my only nephew was born, but really didn't want to have my own.. whether or not i would have been a good parent will never be manifest, i just always knew i never wanted to be a Mom.
guess if everyone felt like me the world's populace woud be zero zip zilch LOL!
Kids are cute... just not for me
My late 2nd wife felt similarly. She toyed with the idea of kids briefly during her first marriage but her husband was flaky at holding down jobs and she didn't feel he'd be good in the role model or provider department, and as it turned out, the marriage would have ended in divorce, which is never easy on kids.
But she was not mommy material either. When I married her, I had two teens whose biological mother was nowhere to be found, and my new wife just was tone deaf and ham-fisted as a mother. No shame in that, but she just had no idea how to approach it. In retrospect I realize now, given that I had kids, I should have constrained my choices in mates to someone who was either able to fill that role more intuitively or at least to deal with it more realistically. It has strained my relationship with my children in ways that are only now healing, largely thanks to my current wife, who is definitely a Momma Bear(tm) and has really worked to bring us all together.
I salute you for knowing yourself and not getting into some role either unthinkingly or out of social pressure. You're a lot happier for it anyway.
When human population crossed the 2 billion mark we all should have been questioning whether we should have children or not. Sadly, as the population has crossed the 7 billion mark, most human are still not asking that question. One wonders if they'll begin asking the question when it crosses the 10 billion mark. Probably not, most humans are myopic to the fact that most, if not all our social difficulties are directly related to how many of us there are to support.
The event that shaped my decision not to be a mother was my father's remarriage when I was 11 years old. (He had been awarded full custody after my parents' divorce). I had always been the youngest with an older brother to look after me, and I liked it that way. Suddenly I had a 26-year-old stepmother with three small children aged 3, 5 and 7.
Neither my brother nor I liked my stepmother, and the feeling was mutual. Shortly after the marriage my brother bailed out and went to live with our mom and stepdad. So in a matter of weeks, I went from being the youngest with one sibling to being the oldest of four. I hated it! Both my father and stepmother worked full time, so I ended up doing an awful lot of (unpaid) babysitting.
I learned very quickly that taking care of young children is a lot of work with few rewards. I also lost my freedom and my privacy, which was a very big consideration for a bookish, shy introvert. The experience of being an unwilling big sister made me realize that I need my space and that I don't enjoy being around children. I have never regretted my decision and was lucky enough to marry a man who had no interest in being a father.
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