Where are my people?Homesick from Detroit (Phoenix, Chandler: jobs, house)

[gemini2daheart]

Ok, Ive been in Phoenix for 2 years now and I have yet to meet any quality down to earth women. Im from Detroit, MI. Im married and have 3 wonderful kids and Im not a "club mama". I really miss my sistas.. Its not only that, but I feel very out of place out here with some of the very unfriendly Latinas I have ran into. Usually when Im out with my husband, I get the most bizaar look from them, while in the next look they are checking my husband out. I have tried to smile and strike up conversation with some women from other cultures within my age group but its such a difference, I just miss my sistas. Not only that, I found that people from the mid west as a whole are a lot more friendly than the people I have met here. I work at a job ( a great job) where 90% of the people are old enough to be my parents or grandparents, so no peers there. My sister moved out here but she's single ( I WONDER WHY) so she goes out a lot more than I do. Where do I find some decent African Americans to connect with. Im about ready to go back to the D. I love all kinds of people, but everyone wants to connect with people that have simular backrounds. I just want a few friends who understand why my kids look grey when they get out of the pool, or why my hair is one lengh one day and longer the next. Someone who knows how to cook some soul food, someone who knows how to press some hair and speaks english.

[fcorrales80]

You might be more comfortable in Atlanta since that is where soul food has long traditions. "Soul food" here is Mexican since that is the long established culture of the area. I know there aren't many blacks in AZ, but you will find more in Chandler and the East Valley as well as the nice central Phx neighborhoods. I live in the Roosevelt Historic district and many of my neighbors are professional, and many of them are black and other minority groups like myself. AND the white population is varied and friendly/open minded.

[PhxBuckeye]

Are you serious? How could someone be homesick for Detroit? I thought everyone was trying to jailbreak from that hole. Just kiddin'. I hope you find some people to connect with.

BTW, I don't know if you need it to be fried to be considered soul food, but there is a great BBQ place on 24th St. and Broadway (I think). It's back in a manufacturing type plaza. Also, there is a long running family business that's run out of the KEYS Community Center. That's on Broadway in the "South Mountain Village." They specialize in soul food. They've catered some of the biggest events in town. KEYS is run by a great lady name Deborah Kidd Chapman. She is an amazing person and KEYS is a facility that's truely dedicated to its community.


Go Bucks!!!

[GilaMonster]

Hm, my first reaction was disbelief as well. How can anyone be homesick for Detroit, one of the worst places in the nation? And, considering that most people living here in Arizona are actually from the midwest, how can anyone say that midwesterners are friendlier than Arizonans?

Then of course I realized you were speaking about black people. I don't know more about it, but lately I have seen a lot of cars with Michigan plates, driven by younger-than-a-retiree black people, so there must be more than just you in the valley. However, your job experience might be pretty typical for the valley, many people only moved here after their kids had grown up. We have relatively many older people here.

[YAZ]

A belated "Welcome to Phoenix" to you.

I'm from the Detroit area too.

I'm just a simple white guy, but I recognize the cultural differences as well.

You'll get used to it, this is a very "cool" place to live.

Give it some time......

[trudawg]

I too hail from the great state of Michigan. Grew up in Detroit, lived in Ypsi/Ann Arbor when I left MI a year and a half ago. Your experiences are very similar to alot of people I've encountered.
Plain and simple, a good proportion of Mexicans DO NOT like black people. I don't take it personal, it's just a cultural thing for them. They prefer lighter skinned people with blue eyes and blonde hair. If you watch some of the hispanic tv shows notice ALL YOU SEE will be lighter shaded hispanics w/ fair colored hair.
Most black women I meet say the same thing and get the same reactions! But take it from me a single black man.........the Latina chicks ARE NOT into us either...lol
Personally I love ALL types of women, but prefer to be with someone whom I can relate to and share's the same experiences.
Oh and the only thing I miss about Detroit are my family and friends! Everytime I go home to visit I can't wait to get back to PHX. Everything is so old in MI, and everything is so new here in PHX.
P.S.......Whats up with your sister?? LOL

[artvandelay]

I came from Lansing, then from Chicagoland, and I didn't miss Michigan so much while in Chicago because it's still the midwest, and has many similarities. But being out here for 2 years, I miss the midwest in general, some of Michigan, some of Chicago. It's a whole different vibe out here, and it takes getting used to. There's more isolation out here, maybe due to the extreme weather, but I would bet it's becoming more like that in the midwest as well. And when jobs leave an area, crime goes up, friendliness goes down. I'm glad I left Michigan when I did, but still miss some things.

[gemini2daheart]

Originally Posted by GilaMonster

Hm, my first reaction was disbelief as well. How can anyone be homesick for Detroit, one of the worst places in the nation? And, considering that most people living here in Arizona are actually from the midwest, how can anyone say that midwesterners are friendlier than Arizonans?

Then of course I realized you were speaking about black people. I don't know more about it, but lately I have seen a lot of cars with Michigan plates, driven by younger-than-a-retiree black people, so there must be more than just you in the valley. However, your job experience might be pretty typical for the valley, many people only moved here after their kids had grown up. We have relatively many older people here.

thanks for your response however if you have never lived in Detroit, you can't really speak to what life is like out there. People only know what they see on the t.v or what someone told them it was like. Everyone has a right to their opinion and I was speaking out to people who can give me some advice on how to connect, not change my oppinion. Thanks

[gemini2daheart]

Originally Posted by YAZ

A belated "Welcome to Phoenix" to you.

I'm from the Detroit area too.

I'm just a simple white guy, but I recognize the cultural differences as well.

You'll get used to it, this is a very "cool" place to live.

Give it some time......

Thanks for the positive encourgement.. Just confirms what Im saying (lol)

[gemini2daheart]

Originally Posted by trudawg

I too hail from the great state of Michigan. Grew up in Detroit, lived in Ypsi/Ann Arbor when I left MI a year and a half ago. Your experiences are very similar to alot of people I've encountered.
Plain and simple, a good proportion of Mexicans DO NOT like black people. I don't take it personal, it's just a cultural thing for them. They prefer lighter skinned people with blue eyes and blonde hair. If you watch some of the hispanic tv shows notice ALL YOU SEE will be lighter shaded hispanics w/ fair colored hair.
Most black women I meet say the same thing and get the same reactions! But take it from me a single black man.........the Latina chicks ARE NOT into us either...lol
Personally I love ALL types of women, but prefer to be with someone whom I can relate to and share's the same experiences.
Oh and the only thing I miss about Detroit are my family and friends! Everytime I go home to visit I can't wait to get back to PHX. Everything is so old in MI, and everything is so new here in PHX.
P.S.......Whats up with your sister?? LOL

Thanks trudawg for the hometown love.. The D is something you can only appreciate if you've LIVED there. I am not going to sit here and say Michigan is so WONDERFUL,, its the People who make the place what it is. I have met some of the most wonderful, educated,talented,creative people while living there. But all most people focus on is the crime rate, the poverty, and ecomomic situation. I lived in Southfield, MI and had a beautiful house that would kick most of the house out here in the head, but I moved for a better living situation and fiancially Phoenix is booming. My problem is the people I have ran into. Be it at the store, the gym, the Library or where ever. Not all but most, and that why I can only speak to my experiance. That is what I said initialy, but I guess people didn't get that. Whoever has a problem with what I said, don't need to reply to me. I asked for HELP with my situation not a change of opinion, you know.. I'll holla at you off post about my sister.. (lol)