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Old 08-09-2009, 08:04 PM
 
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I have spent some time in Arizona, especially in the Phoenix area. I have always wondered why there were more black/white families here than black families. I don't think I even saw a black family while I was there. Don't get me wrong, I am all for interracial relationships and I understand that Arizona and the Phoenix area does not have a huge percentage of African Americans which might play a role.

Yet as a young black man, you would think a lot of my fellow sista's and brotha's wouldn't be so quick to adjust to the overall surroundings. I think many of them are catching the jungle fever so quickly down there.

In any case do you think it is truly accepted here in the Phoenix area or do you think people just don't care?

 
Old 08-09-2009, 09:37 PM
 
Location: Mesa, Az
21,157 posts, read 26,352,670 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Ran9 View Post
I have spent some time in Arizona, especially in the Phoenix area. I have always wondered why there were more black/white families here than black families. I don't think I even saw a black family while I was there. Don't get me wrong, I am all for interracial relationships and I understand that Arizona and the Phoenix area does not have a huge percentage of African Americans which might play a role.

Yet as a young black man, you would think a lot of my fellow sista's and brotha's wouldn't be so quick to adjust to the overall surroundings. I think many of them are catching the jungle fever so quickly down there.

In any case do you think it is truly accepted here in the Phoenix area or do you think people just don't care?
Probably because the Phx area grew really big after that Jim Crow nonsense was ended here back ca. 1953. Too; Blacks are relatively rare here compared to places like Wash DC, Detroit, Chicago, Atlanta, etc. hence less 'chance' for attitude problems from us Whites here.

And those Black people who moved here tended to be more Libertarian as well as more educated vs. the stereotypical 'ghetto fools'-------again, cutting down the chances of stupid behavior.
 
Old 08-09-2009, 09:41 PM
 
Location: La lune et les étoiles
14,693 posts, read 9,771,955 times
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Why is this question never asked about White/Asian or White/Hispanic couples and families?

Anytime you have a community that does not have an abundance of a particular race you will have intermarriage with the majority.

Its not rocket science....or jungle fever!
 
Old 08-10-2009, 03:09 PM
 
539 posts, read 1,193,134 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by calipoppy View Post
Why is this question never asked about White/Asian or White/Hispanic couples and families?

Anytime you have a community that does not have an abundance of a particular race you will have intermarriage with the majority.

Its not rocket science....or jungle fever!
I'm more inclined to agree with this ^^ sentiment, but also agree with AB's statement that people here in AZ seem more open to interracial dating than other areas.
But too answer the question why one doesn't see the White/Asian/Hispanic topics popping up is because no one has bothered to ask.....lol
Now with respect to the OP's question. I think a large influx of blacks (especially black men) from other metropolises have found that women here have openly expressed their attraction and they have chosen to go for what they don't normally have access to.
For me however (being a black man), moving to Phoenix has had the complete opposite affect. Where as my ex-wife was not black and I have bi-racial children, once I got to Phoenix and saw/experienced just how few blacks their were I have specifically only dated within my race. Not that I have anything against anyone of another race, but at the end of the day I just wanted to be with someone that could relate to the way I see world.
I hear the same story from many black women that complain about black dudes being drawn to white women, but honestly I think that is happening EVERYWHERE, and not just Phoenix. Black men have become somewhat exotic in a strange sort of way, and I guess with the extra attention we have explored other avenues and have bought into the beauty myth just as much as any other red blooded human on this planet.

Now before someone chimes in with the usual "Why does it matter, we're all the same inside, can't we all just get along" mantra. I would say, it absolutely matters 100% because at the end of the day we as HUMANS are comfortable the most with those who resemble us the most. Thats' just human nature, and being in Phoenix I am constantly the ONLY black person around and have always been made aware of my race in almost ALL situations I encounter. I can't explain it to you no matter how much I try to put into words.
Its like a woman trying to explain to a man what it feels like to have a baby.
 
Old 08-10-2009, 03:24 PM
 
Location: Sonoran Desert
17,348 posts, read 20,521,273 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by trudawg View Post
I'm more inclined to agree with this ^^ sentiment, but also agree with AB's statement that people here in AZ seem more open to interracial dating than other areas.
But too answer the question why one doesn't see the White/Asian/Hispanic topics popping up is because no one has bothered to ask.....lol
Now with respect to the OP's question. I think a large influx of blacks (especially black men) from other metropolises have found that women here have openly expressed their attraction and they have chosen to go for what they don't normally have access to.
For me however (being a black man), moving to Phoenix has had the complete opposite affect. Where as my ex-wife was not black and I have bi-racial children, once I got to Phoenix and saw/experienced just how few blacks their were I have specifically only dated within my race. Not that I have anything against anyone of another race, but at the end of the day I just wanted to be with someone that could relate to the way I see world.
I hear the same story from many black women that complain about black dudes being drawn to white women, but honestly I think that is happening EVERYWHERE, and not just Phoenix. Black men have become somewhat exotic in a strange sort of way, and I guess with the extra attention we have explored other avenues and have bought into the beauty myth just as much as any other red blooded human on this planet.

Now before someone chimes in with the usual "Why does it matter, we're all the same inside, can't we all just get along" mantra. I would say, it absolutely matters 100% because at the end of the day we as HUMANS are comfortable the most with those who resemble us the most. Thats' just human nature, and being in Phoenix I am constantly the ONLY black person around and have always been made aware of my race in almost ALL situations I encounter. I can't explain it to you no matter how much I try to put into words.
Its like a woman trying to explain to a man what it feels like to have a baby.
If we were most comfortable with those who resemble us we would marry our sisters/brothers or our cousins. I think one is most comfortable with one who is compatible - and that CAN be a person of another race, religion, political persuasion or whatever. Compatibility is a funny thing that I have never quite been able to predict. But I know race is not the most important part of it (for me at least).
 
Old 08-10-2009, 03:34 PM
 
539 posts, read 1,193,134 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Ponderosa View Post
If we were most comfortable with those who resemble us we would marry our sisters/brothers or our cousins. I think one is most comfortable with one who is compatible - and that CAN be a person of another race, religion, political persuasion or whatever. Compatibility is a funny thing that I have never quite been able to predict. But I know race is not the most important part of it (for me at least).
I'm not talking about just dating, I'm talking about being comfortable over-all.
If you were American and walked into a room filled with 100 Japanese people and saw 3 other Americans, who do you think you'd gravitate to?
Now if you replace American and Japanese with white/black/Hispanic/Asian etc, the same would be true for all those scenario's. It's Human Nature
 
Old 08-10-2009, 04:06 PM
 
Location: Sonoran Desert
17,348 posts, read 20,521,273 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by trudawg View Post
I'm not talking about just dating, I'm talking about being comfortable over-all.
If you were American and walked into a room filled with 100 Japanese people and saw 3 other Americans, who do you think you'd gravitate to?
Now if you replace American and Japanese with white/black/Hispanic/Asian etc, the same would be true for all those scenario's. It's Human Nature
LOL. Funny you should put it that way. There was a time many years back when I arrived late to a class I was scheduled for. The room had self-divided into groups that were to be the study teams for the class. All the groups were full except for the "black" one and I had to join that - with some discomfort admittedly. It turned out to be a stroke of luck or something. I hit it off with that group very well and ended up marrying one of them! We're still together.
 
Old 08-10-2009, 04:10 PM
 
Location: NW Phoenix
477 posts, read 1,062,816 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Ponderosa View Post
LOL. Funny you should put it that way. There was a time many years back when I arrived late to a class I was scheduled for. The room had self-divided into groups that were to be the study teams for the class. All the groups were full except for the "black" one and I had to join that - with some discomfort admittedly. It turned out to be a stroke of luck or something. I hit it off with that group very well and ended up marrying one of them! We're still together.
That's the story of my life
 
Old 08-10-2009, 04:34 PM
 
16 posts, read 29,167 times
Reputation: 21
Quote:
Originally Posted by trudawg View Post
I'm more inclined to agree with this ^^ sentiment, but also agree with AB's statement that people here in AZ seem more open to interracial dating than other areas.
But too answer the question why one doesn't see the White/Asian/Hispanic topics popping up is because no one has bothered to ask.....lol
Now with respect to the OP's question. I think a large influx of blacks (especially black men) from other metropolises have found that women here have openly expressed their attraction and they have chosen to go for what they don't normally have access to.
For me however (being a black man), moving to Phoenix has had the complete opposite affect. Where as my ex-wife was not black and I have bi-racial children, once I got to Phoenix and saw/experienced just how few blacks their were I have specifically only dated within my race. Not that I have anything against anyone of another race, but at the end of the day I just wanted to be with someone that could relate to the way I see world.
I hear the same story from many black women that complain about black dudes being drawn to white women, but honestly I think that is happening EVERYWHERE, and not just Phoenix. Black men have become somewhat exotic in a strange sort of way, and I guess with the extra attention we have explored other avenues and have bought into the beauty myth just as much as any other red blooded human on this planet.

Now before someone chimes in with the usual "Why does it matter, we're all the same inside, can't we all just get along" mantra. I would say, it absolutely matters 100% because at the end of the day we as HUMANS are comfortable the most with those who resemble us the most. Thats' just human nature, and being in Phoenix I am constantly the ONLY black person around and have always been made aware of my race in almost ALL situations I encounter. I can't explain it to you no matter how much I try to put into words.
Its like a woman trying to explain to a man what it feels like to have a baby.
Maybe you were uncomfortable being married to a white woman because it made you stand out..maybe now you are only dating black women to prevent and minimize the chance for another divorce?..
Your words makes me think you feel uncomfortable in your own skin..since you are ALWAYS the only black person around. You will attract people that have a similar inner state like you so think about that
PS! the color of love is RED, and a man may never know what it feels like to have a baby but empathy goes a long way brotha..
 
Old 08-10-2009, 04:49 PM
 
539 posts, read 1,193,134 times
Reputation: 275
Quote:
Originally Posted by marriedfor 11 View Post
Maybe you were uncomfortable being married to a white woman because it made you stand out..maybe now you are only dating black women to prevent and minimize the chance for another divorce?..
Your words makes me think you feel uncomfortable in your own skin..since you are ALWAYS the only black person around. You will attract people that have a similar inner state like you so think about that
PS! the color of love is RED, and a man may never know what it feels like to have a baby but empathy goes a long way brotha..

nope, I was never uncomfortable being with the mother of my children, and the first person I fell in love with.
I'm never uncomfortable in my skin as it has made me the person whom I am today and my confidence and high self esteem supersedes all of that.
As I said before I cannot explain to you the feeling within me being the "only" black person in many scenarios. Like Ponderosa "Admitted" there is definately a FEELING, I'm not saying it's always a negative one, but just being more aware. If you are indeed cacuasion I would love for you if only for one day be the only white among a sea of blacks, in every situation you encounter, and report back to me that there was absotely no indifference, and tell me you where not made aware of your skin color, then times that by 365, then multiply that again by 3 years, then you will begin to have window into my world and my experience living in phoenix. Only then IMHO might you be able to have the kind of "empathy" that brings understanding of what someone else experiences.
Now obviously this is MY choice to remain here in Phoenix, and honestly I do like living here, I was just merely stating my experience for the nay-sayers who seem to pop in every race related topic to tell us race shouldn't matter when IMO it clearly does for some people



**edited** to add the last paragrah

Last edited by trudawg; 08-10-2009 at 05:09 PM..
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