Welcome to City-Data.com Forum!
U.S. CitiesCity-Data Forum Index
Go Back   City-Data Forum > U.S. Forums > Pennsylvania > Pittsburgh
 [Register]
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
View detailed profile (Advanced) or search
site with Google Custom Search

Search Forums  (Advanced)
Closed Thread Start New Thread
 
Old 12-23-2010, 08:50 PM
 
Location: Marshall-Shadeland, Pittsburgh, PA
32,606 posts, read 77,302,880 times
Reputation: 19071

Advertisements

Hello, fellow Pittsburghers in Paradise!

I have been sitting here watching the movie Home Alone 2: Lost in New York, and I just got an excellent idea for a gift to help curry favor with someone I've been trying to win over for the past six weeks. In this movie Macaulay Culkin's character, Kevin McCalester, is shopping at Duncan's Toy Chest and decides to donate $20 to the store's efforts to raise funds for a nearby childrens' hospital in the city. The clerk (who is also the owner, Mr. Duncan) is so touched by his generosity that he lets Kevin pick any ornament he'd like off of a small Christmas tree nearby. He makes the specific suggestion that he select the two turtle doves because of the following quotes:

MR. DUNCAN: "You see that tree there? Well to show our appreciation for your generosity, I'm gonna let you select an object from that tree that you can take home with you."
KEVIN: "For free?"
MR. DUNCAN: "Oh yes. May I make a suggestion? Take the Turtle Doves."
KEVIN: "I can have two?"
MR. DUNCAN: "Well, two Turtle Doves. I'll tell you what you do. You keep one, and you give the other one to a very special person. You see, Turtle Doves are a symbol of friendship and love. And as long as each of you has your Turtle Dove, you'll be friends forever."

Anyhow, I wanted to give him a Christmas card and shove a turtle dove ornament inside. I'm going to include a variation of that last quote as part of a lengthier message "I'm giving this to you as a symbol of my devotion to you as someone who really feels so blessed to have you in my life. As long as each one of us has a turtle dove, we'll be friends forever." I'm going to embellish much more with my inherent verbosity, of course, but in addition to some other trinkets I have planned for him (a new wallet, a stuffed animal, a DVD, and an Edible Arrangement to be shared by he and his roommates) I wanted to really "wow" him. Right now I feel like nothing more than a friend with benefits to him, but I've wanted a boyfriend for years.

My problem? I can't seem to find turtle dove ornaments anywhere around town. Does anybody know where I can locate these elusive birds?!

 
Old 12-23-2010, 09:14 PM
 
178 posts, read 398,182 times
Reputation: 197
To be honest, IMHO, as a guy, your message is going to get across loud and clear with or without the doves. You are practically showering him with gifts with that list there. Dont be surprised if it doesn't have the effect you intend. I think what you really need to do is actually tell him how you feel.
 
Old 12-23-2010, 09:16 PM
 
Location: Marshall-Shadeland, Pittsburgh, PA
32,606 posts, read 77,302,880 times
Reputation: 19071
Quote:
Originally Posted by RedBall View Post
To be honest, IMHO, as a guy, your message is going to get across loud and clear with or without the doves. You are practically showering him with gifts with that list there. Dont be surprised if it doesn't have the effect you intend. I think what you really need to do is actually tell him how you feel.
I did. He doesn't want to "put labels" on anything. He "just wants to see where or if things go anywhere". He's been single since 2006, and I don't really think he knows what it means to be a "boyfriend" vs. a "fun buddy". It seems like I have no trouble finding guys who want to enjoy what I have to offer behind closed doors, but when it comes time to want to take someone out on a romantic and spontaneous road trip everyone flees.
 
Old 12-23-2010, 09:32 PM
 
3,164 posts, read 6,924,618 times
Reputation: 1278
Forcing yourself on him, with all these romantic gestures will not garner favor with a guy who is leery of relationships. You aren't going to ''wow'' him, you're going to scare him to death. He's likely to run screaming in the other direction. He's made it clear that he wants to take things slow. If you care about him, you'll honor his wishes. Believe me, he KNOWS how you feel! Don't push it, that never works. Does it?
 
Old 12-23-2010, 09:42 PM
 
2,324 posts, read 2,892,663 times
Reputation: 1785
Fuggedaboutit.
 
Old 12-23-2010, 09:46 PM
 
Location: Marshall-Shadeland, Pittsburgh, PA
32,606 posts, read 77,302,880 times
Reputation: 19071
Yeah. Looks like random sex is the way to go.
 
Old 12-23-2010, 10:55 PM
 
20,273 posts, read 32,889,722 times
Reputation: 2910
Macy's has a good selection of ornaments.

Have you tried looking for a 12 Days of Christmas set? We once got one in brass.
 
Old 12-23-2010, 11:36 PM
 
43,011 posts, read 107,662,571 times
Reputation: 30710
Quote:
Originally Posted by RestonRunner86 View Post
I did. He doesn't want to "put labels" on anything. He "just wants to see where or if things go anywhere". He's been single since 2006, and I don't really think he knows what it means to be a "boyfriend" vs. a "fun buddy". It seems like I have no trouble finding guys who want to enjoy what I have to offer behind closed doors, but when it comes time to want to take someone out on a romantic and spontaneous road trip everyone flees.
Admittedly, I don't know ANYTHING about how gay courtship works.

But your comment above in bold cries out for a little heterosexual advice that heterosexual women need to hear sometimes.

Quit giving yourself up so easily. If they stick around for a while without sex, chances are they like you for more than sex.

Find common interests and do things outside of the bedroom, outside of the house. Go places together early on.

And people always seem to want what they can't have. Few people like to be chased intensely so don't smother.

For some strange reason, people love the thrill of the chase. Be alluring and a bit elusive but don't play head games. (careful balance there.)

Seriously, if you want to go away on a spontaneous road trip, suggest it BEFORE you have sex. They'll go on that road trip!

And they will probably go away on more road trips if they have fun the first time.

Like I said, I know NOTHING about homosexual relationships.

If it's irrelevant, disregard. But I suspect people are people regardless of sexual gender preference.

Last edited by Hopes; 12-23-2010 at 11:46 PM..
 
Old 12-24-2010, 01:23 AM
 
Location: Kittanning
4,692 posts, read 8,991,642 times
Reputation: 3668
This is some of the best advice I have read on this forum, and it's not even about cities. I'm a gay male, and all of this applies to us.

If the guy you like hasn't been in a relationship since 2006, and doesn't seem to be looking for one, chances are he doesn't want one. But maybe you can get to be a close friend, by spending time with him, and getting to know him. I am currently in this situation with a guy I like. He's not interested in dating or relationships, apparently, but he seems to love spending time with me. It's not sexual, although it used to be. Now it's just about enjoying each other's company, and I find that a lot more enjoyable than the sex stuff anyway.

But like Hopes said, if you offer the road trip BEFORE sex, they will be more likely to go with you. For some reason, if you have sex too early, the guy might stop coming around, because the thrill is gone. I don't typically have that problem. My problem is typically that the guy will keep coming around, but ONLY for sex. LOL

Quote:
Originally Posted by Hopes View Post
Admittedly, I don't know ANYTHING about how gay courtship works.

But your comment above in bold cries out for a little heterosexual advice that heterosexual women need to hear sometimes.

Quit giving yourself up so easily. If they stick around for a while without sex, chances are they like you for more than sex.

Find common interests and do things outside of the bedroom, outside of the house. Go places together early on.

And people always seem to want what they can't have. Few people like to be chased intensely so don't smother.

For some strange reason, people love the thrill of the chase. Be alluring and a bit elusive but don't play head games. (careful balance there.)

Seriously, if you want to go away on a spontaneous road trip, suggest it BEFORE you have sex. They'll go on that road trip!

And they will probably go away on more road trips if they have fun the first time.

Like I said, I know NOTHING about homosexual relationships.

If it's irrelevant, disregard. But I suspect people are people regardless of sexual gender preference.
 
Old 12-24-2010, 06:29 AM
 
Location: Marshall-Shadeland, Pittsburgh, PA
32,606 posts, read 77,302,880 times
Reputation: 19071
Quote:
Originally Posted by alleghenyangel View Post
This is some of the best advice I have read on this forum, and it's not even about cities. I'm a gay male, and all of this applies to us.

If the guy you like hasn't been in a relationship since 2006, and doesn't seem to be looking for one, chances are he doesn't want one. But maybe you can get to be a close friend, by spending time with him, and getting to know him. I am currently in this situation with a guy I like. He's not interested in dating or relationships, apparently, but he seems to love spending time with me. It's not sexual, although it used to be. Now it's just about enjoying each other's company, and I find that a lot more enjoyable than the sex stuff anyway.

But like Hopes said, if you offer the road trip BEFORE sex, they will be more likely to go with you. For some reason, if you have sex too early, the guy might stop coming around, because the thrill is gone. I don't typically have that problem. My problem is typically that the guy will keep coming around, but ONLY for sex. LOL
I'm not looking for more "close friends." For God's sake I already have about 1,000 Facebook friends, and I know nearly all of them. I was very clear that I wanted a boyfriend from the get-go, so I'm miffed, to say the least, I've been led on for this long just because he enjoys "bedroom time." I'm going to abstain from any sexual innuendo or gestures from now until he broaches the subject and asks why we haven't been intimate, and that's when I'll find out if he cares about me as more than just a "playmate" or not.

For the record just because someone's been single long-term doesn't mean that they WANT to be alone. Some of us are just undateable. I've been single for years, too, and I'm tired of spending my birthdays alone, Christmas alone, ringing in the new year alone, Valentine's Day alone, etc. while seeing all of my annoying friends cyber-smooching and cyber-canoodling on Facebook with one another. It irks me to know there are some of my friends who have cheated on their better halves and are still given opportunity after opportunity while those of us who value monogomy are shot down. For God's sake I'm "open-minded" to sexual suggestions, whether they be indulging in odd requests or inviting "company" into the mix. LOL! I just hate this heavy emphasis upon sex, sex, sex, in the LGBT community. No wonder why AIDS is such a problem.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.

Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.


Closed Thread


Settings
X
Data:
Loading data...
Based on 2000-2020 data
Loading data...

123
Hide US histogram


Over $104,000 in prizes was already given out to active posters on our forum and additional giveaways are planned!

Go Back   City-Data Forum > U.S. Forums > Pennsylvania > Pittsburgh
View detailed profiles of:

All times are GMT -6.

© 2005-2024, Advameg, Inc. · Please obey Forum Rules · Terms of Use and Privacy Policy · Bug Bounty

City-Data.com - Contact Us - Archive 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35, 36, 37 - Top