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Old 08-06-2019, 07:53 AM
 
Location: Pittsburgh, PA (Morningside)
12,509 posts, read 12,026,727 times
Reputation: 10610

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Quote:
Originally Posted by Moby Hick View Post
Me too. But you can't let kids push you around regardless. They're really bossy.
I also think you can't anticipate what will make your kids happy at age 5 (or whatever) so it's best to go with what you think is best rather than suffering through a neighborhood and/or commute that you're unhappy with for "their sake."

I personally know people who moved to the burbs for "good schools" when they had kids, then immediately moved back to the city after they graduated. Their kids, once grown, said they felt like it was a big mistake, because they were actually really unhappy - sometimes even bullied - in the "good suburban" districts the parents chose for their sake.
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Old 08-06-2019, 08:13 AM
 
7,774 posts, read 4,633,307 times
Reputation: 8502
Quote:
Originally Posted by eschaton View Post
Personally, I stayed in the city because I thought it was the best choice for my kids.
I made the exact same decision. Toured the "good" suburban school districts and realized the city would be a much better environment for my kids.
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Old 08-06-2019, 08:38 AM
 
1,422 posts, read 854,466 times
Reputation: 1010
Quote:
Originally Posted by gladhands View Post
I made the exact same decision. Toured the "good" suburban school districts and realized the city would be a much better environment for my kids.
it certainly helps to be able to afford to live in the best feeder zones or send your kids to private school. nobody is saying suburban schools are the best for everybody. it's not like there isn't bullying in city schools.
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Old 08-06-2019, 08:44 AM
gg
 
Location: Pittsburgh
17,990 posts, read 18,351,092 times
Reputation: 11522
Quote:
Originally Posted by eschaton View Post
Personally, I stayed in the city because I thought it was the best choice for my kids.
Why? When I am in the city I feel the like minds to the super far left is wildly over the top. In the first ring suburbs I feel there is so much more diversity in how people think. I enjoy diversity because it makes people much more tolerant of other's views and allows for real dialogue with tolerance.

This is one of the reasons I like suburbs that are near cities. I like differing views. When you look at voting you see how interesting first ring suburbs are. It is very hard to predict an outcome of a presidential election in my district. It could go either way. In the city there is no diversity. It always goes the same old way. Wildly left and no tolerance for anyone in the middle or right leaning. I find the city to be very angry and intolerant.

So why did you choose the city for your kids?
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Old 08-06-2019, 08:51 AM
 
Location: Pittsburgh, PA (Morningside)
12,509 posts, read 12,026,727 times
Reputation: 10610
Quote:
Originally Posted by gg View Post
So why did you choose the city for your kids?
Basically? I grew up in a suburb with top-rated public schools in Connecticut and I hated it. I hated the snotty, preppy rich kids I was surrounded by who called me a nerd and a freak. I hated that my neighborhood had no sidewalks and I had to walk on side of a high-speed road for about 20 minutes to get to a single corner store (let alone the library, mall, or anything else more interesting. I hated the fact that because I didn't learn to drive until I was 19 I was basically "trapped" all through my teen years - basically at the mercy of rides from friends. And then when i actually did go out people thought it was "cool" to hang out in Dunkin Donuts or Denny's. And even though I went to a "good school district" I thought that 75% of my teachers were useless, and I learned far more reading independently about history, science, etc than was ever taught in school.

I didn't want my kids to have a childhood like I had. I wanted something better. So I chose city life for them.
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Old 08-06-2019, 08:59 AM
 
Location: Pittsburgh
5,959 posts, read 7,077,608 times
Reputation: 8749
Pittsburgh isn't lefty or smug. I grew up in a family of old-school boring moderate Republicans. I haven't changed my mind on anything and fit easily into the local Democrats.
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Old 08-06-2019, 09:12 AM
 
Location: Polish Hill, Pittsburgh, PA
30,307 posts, read 67,532,798 times
Reputation: 15968
I grew up within a mixed-income suburban school district and attended those public schools.

I would have rather attended a mixed-income urban school district.

Why?

Where I grew up there was nearly no diversity along racial, cultural, ethnic, etc. lines. I was the only openly-gay male student in my senior class. There was a "token" Jewish family, a few "token" African-American students, a literal couple of "token" Asian-Americans, etc. I was a "minority" because I was a Protestant in a Roman Catholic-dominated town. I was also a "minority" because I was majority-German-American in a majority-Italian-American town.

The end result? Although I've grown out of it now I was in for a HUGE culture shock when I moved from that white, non-Hispanic, hetero-normative, Christian bubble to the VERY diverse suburbs of Washington DC, and it was difficult to adjust since I had limited (or, realistically, NO) exposure to differences in others. My only exposure growing up to black culture was seeing the local news stories disproportionately showing the few African-Americans where I lived committing violent crimes and being arrested.

Fortunately I'm more open-minded, tolerant, and accepting of differences in others, now, but I didn't like growing up in a suburban "bubble". I'm only glad that my school district had diverse socioeconomics, at least, because there were kids from trailer parks on up to fancy McMansion subdivisions attending there. Otherwise it was a bubble. It's not good to keep your kids insulated from differences in others under the guise of "good test scores" (while disavowing the racial achievement gap on standardized testing).
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Old 08-06-2019, 09:34 AM
 
Location: Brookline
2,723 posts, read 2,060,827 times
Reputation: 3242
Quote:
Originally Posted by gg View Post
Why? When I am in the city I feel the like minds to the super far left is wildly over the top. In the first ring suburbs I feel there is so much more diversity in how people think. I enjoy diversity because it makes people much more tolerant of other's views and allows for real dialogue with tolerance.

This is one of the reasons I like suburbs that are near cities. I like differing views. When you look at voting you see how interesting first ring suburbs are. It is very hard to predict an outcome of a presidential election in my district. It could go either way. In the city there is no diversity. It always goes the same old way. Wildly left and no tolerance for anyone in the middle or right leaning. I find the city to be very angry and intolerant.

So why did you choose the city for your kids?
Im super lefty, my neighbor keeps a Trump hat on his dashboard (well used to, it has seemed to not be as proud these days) and I live in the city.

However, in the first ring suburb where I have a lot of friends and spend a good amount of time at social events, 100% of people are adamant about voting for any democrat that ends up on the ticket no matter what.

It's all anecdotal, no matter where you live.

Last edited by PghYinzer; 08-06-2019 at 11:00 AM.. Reason: Spelling....words matter.
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Old 08-06-2019, 10:43 AM
 
Location: Atlanta
187 posts, read 45,119 times
Reputation: 127
Quote:
Why? When I am in the city I feel the like minds to the super far left is wildly over the top. In the first ring suburbs I feel there is so much more diversity in how people think. I enjoy diversity because it makes people much more tolerant of other's views and allows for real dialogue with tolerance.
For people who get out a lot, they see diversity in thought. People who don't get out much, rely on stereotypes and caricatures….
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Old 08-06-2019, 10:55 AM
 
Location: Downtown Cranberry Twp.
8,809 posts, read 5,480,270 times
Reputation: 2058
Quote:
Originally Posted by Joe_P View Post
For people who get out a lot, they see diversity in thought. People who don't get out much, rely on stereotypes and caricatures….
Don’t forget assumptions.

Many of those who literally get/got out have often seen the truth in the stereotypes and simply have no time for it.
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