why isn't it considered more valuable for men to have a balance between masculine and feminine qualities? (compare, world)
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I don't know. A bit of balance never hurt anyone. I don't like the ultra meaty-headed guys and I don't like the hyper feminine women either. I like it that my gf can keep up with me when I go about one of my geeky rants about computers, astronomy, medical, and meteorology Like everything in nature, everything needs a balance. I wish both sexes were more level-headed, IMO and being more aware of the other sex doesn't upset traditional gender roles, I think. I'm straight and my gf can't hide behind her womanly hint dropping cause I can pick up on it whereas lot of guys I know would be like awww come on just tell me. But it took lots of practice and observation.
exactly! that's what i'm saying. for some reason i didn't even need to practice to see through the hint dropping.
That's how it is in the West. Men should be men, and women should be women. Men are growing too soft in the West, losing their cojones, unless you have Italian blood in you. I've learned most women SAY they like the sensitive man type, but in reality they want their men to be manly too at the same time.
I'm speaking from a Latin American POV, I might add.
The last time I was in Italy, I noticed a lot of the men were rather metrosexual, self-centred, and overly concerned with their "image". All fluff and not much substance.
Well I think that slowly men in the west are becoming feminized and our society is suffering for it. I don't advocate the return of tribalism however I do believe that we live in a society where mediocrity is celebrated. Nature operates with survival of the fittest, only the best survived to procreate and enhance the species.
Now modern "society" has softened us. We live in a culture where at times we deliberately hire inferior candidates to fill some imaginary "diversity" quota, and people never really have to grow up. Even the biggest wastes of oxygen can live the high life because the government will prop them up, and the disturbing thing is these people are breeding at a higher rate than the productive class.
While I'm not a social Darwinist I do believe that at some point our society will be helped by cutting the umbilical cord off of some of our biggest freeloaders. We simply can't afford to help those who won't help themselves. However we won't, because men are now afraid to make tough decisions and instead pander and waffle.
Ever since i was a boy i've always felt very different from most other boys i have met. I was a very sensitive boy, my feelings got hurt easily and i never liked violence very much. I always loved communication, getting along with others and compromise and i loved it when people felt love, connection and understanding.
I am gay, and i'm not saying that all gay men are like this, and that straight men can't be.
I have noticed that compared to a lot of men i can understand women a lot better. I can just tell how others are feeling and their basic motivations without them having to tell me. These are all traits normally considered 'feminine'. I've been told that i'm empathic and intuitive. Some straight guy friends of mine come to me for advice when it comes to their wives and or girlfriends because they can't understand why she is saying or feeling a certain way. Some women come to me for the same thing with it comes to husbands and or boyfriends. I'm considering getting a masters in counseling. I value logic but i believe it needs to be balance with the emotional side of life as well. There is an emotional intelligence that our culture has not cared to develop or care about. I've never understood the stereotypical ahole type of guy etc. This made me very uncomfortable at school and i was extremely bullied for most of my childhood by other guys.
Why aren't these things valued in our culture for guys to have? If everyone had more of a balance with the masculine and feminine we'd all get along so much better and understand so much more.
Good god man!! Assuming feminine traits won't help you understand women. That just aclimates you to mall environments and makes jail time that much weirder. ...
Last edited by Dutchman01; 08-08-2011 at 10:10 AM..
The last time I was in Italy, I noticed a lot of the men were rather metrosexual, self-centred, and overly concerned with their "image".All fluff and not much substance.
Sounds rather familiar. I wonder where I came across that? ...
The engine of sexual attraction is powered by opposites. Male and female are opposite and drawn together like magnets. I don't understand homosexual attraction so I can't comment on that, but I do notice that in even these couples, there does often seem to be one partner who is more typically male and one who is more typically female.
Sensitivity and insight should not really be seen as feminine qualities anyway. Anyone can possess them. I've known plenty of prissy females who have neither! A refined and perceptive male can still be masculine in all the ways that count.
To outline what traits are feminine and what are masculine would take a lot of time and thought that I can't spend right now, but briefly, I prefer emotional effusiveness in females, and emotional stoicism in males. I've come to appreciate my husband's "typical male" stoicism and the strength and steadfastness that goes along with that. One thing I would NOT want is for him to suddenly start crying when he felt stress, or ruminate all day on all his worries, or be right out there with every troubling thought that passes through his mind. Thank God he doesn't do that!
In this age of Oprah where it's fashionable to tell all and then squall about it before an audience, it would do a lot of women well to start having some more male style stoicism, actually. In fact, that respect for personal privacy and emotional reserve used to be the mark of good breeding, and wasn't considered a gender-related trait.
Extreme feminists have tried to make everyone in their own image. After they feminize all the men, then they run off and marry Muslims.
Last edited by chattypatty; 08-08-2011 at 10:19 AM..
Alaska, where men are men, and women win the Iditarod.
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