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I really cant explain it anymore simply than what my post said. Why let the actions of some people influence how you treat others. At least on an individual basis. If someone is being rude or ungrateful to you thats on that person and shouldn't affect how you treat others imo.
As far as holding doors and respecting elders and not getting thanks or not being appreciated like you have experienced, I have experienced the opposite.
I wonder if it is the area where you live that accounts for some of the behavior that bothered you? Fast moving big city mentality maybe?
Yourself, it feels good to do the right thing, doesn't it? Your mother would be proud!
It feels better to get ahead.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Loveshiscountry
Why let the actions of some people influence how you treat others.
Because those some people persist because the others allow it.
Let's call you an actor for good. The some people actors for bad. And the others we'll call sheep.
The sheep "appreciate" that you're nice, but they're moochers: they accept your kindness but make no comparable effort to relay it, and, in fact, they think you owe it to them. And just as they accept your kindness, they accept the degradation from bad actors. The bad actors recognize that you're a submissive, and they take what you offer; they're parasites.
You spend your energy giving to parasites and moochers, and you think that's good? You are funding the bad, but somebody has convinced you that that is good.
One can only focus on one objective at a time. If you're being conscious of opportunities to be courteous, you're not 100% conscious of opportunity to get ahead. Don't you deserve better?
I think whatever radical ideology convinced you that you should behave as you do is the reason our country is in deep: good people are being pimped to scum, so the scum are getting ahead while we're thinking about how to be better people.
Quote:
I wonder if it is the area where you live that accounts for some of the behavior that bothered you? Fast moving big city mentality maybe?
Rudeness seems to be status quo in supermarkets lately.
Loud talkers, plus people push and shove, or "bump" you out of the way.
At Kroger last week a 350 lb 6'3 teenager backed into me because he couldnt see he was in a shopping aisle and perhaps other people are shopping???.
(I am a petite female), he almost knocked me over.
Maybe its a regional thing though. I am in NE Tenn for the month. I will add , in this area no one once has held the supermarket door open for me (they let it slam on your face), unless I am with company.
I assume most grocery stores have automatic doors since people are hauling groceries and carts. They don't in NE Tennessee? Weird.
People who hop the fence to a pool at an apartment complex when they don't live there, and prop the gate open so all their friends can get in. They bring hordes of kids and plop them in the hot tub so no one else can use it, let them run wild screaming and splashing everyone.
People who glare at you when you are in a wheelchair or a motorized scooter like you are inconveniencing them by being handicapped. Or they don't even see you and about run you over.
People who have the bass turned up so loud on their car stereos so that when they pull up beside you it vibrates your car and makes you feel like you chest is going to explode.
Doctors who, when you go to them for help, say "What do you expect me to do about it?"
Because those some people persist because the others allow it.
Let's call you an actor for good. The some people actors for bad. And the others we'll call sheep.
The sheep "appreciate" that you're nice, but they're moochers: they accept your kindness but make no comparable effort to relay it, and, in fact, they think you owe it to them. And just as they accept your kindness, they accept the degradation from bad actors. The bad actors recognize that you're a submissive, and they take what you offer; they're parasites.
You spend your energy giving to parasites and moochers, and you think that's good? You are funding the bad, but somebody has convinced you that that is good.
One can only focus on one objective at a time. If you're being conscious of opportunities to be courteous, you're not 100% conscious of opportunity to get ahead. Don't you deserve better?
I think whatever radical ideology convinced you that you should behave as you do is the reason our country is in deep: good people are being pimped to scum, so the scum are getting ahead while we're thinking about how to be better people.
Townies taught me that I've been foolish.
Good manners and not being rude should be habits that require no conscious thought. I would disagree that people are too focused on being better people. It is quite the opposite, people are focused on themselves. You hold open a door for someone and they don't say thank you; therefore, you should never hold the door open for someone else? I don't get the logic.
The uneducated in manner masses of America .... They are stupid and serve only to support those of us who own businesses. Thank you rude american, now get back to your pathetic job and meaningless existence, I'm trying to enjoy the spoils of my success.
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