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I'll attest that it's not just men. As a women I have no desire either. I have several family members and friends who are also in the no marriage boat.
A lot of females put on a good act when meeting men. Some will say they don't believe in divorce, but you know they're lying. They may be the perfect one but once they get married, their true colors begin to show.
No-fault divorce is probably the worst thing that ever passed.
Quote:
Originally Posted by coloradoalimony
I'm sure paying the ex who cheated on you "only" $1700 a month after taxes for life (seriously, how often is alimony terminated for reasons other than remarriage? Almost never.) is just fine with most people.
Seriously.
Let me ask you this, since the topic is " Young men are giving up on marriage". If everyone had to take a test before getting a marriage license, and one of the test questions was to calculate the alimony in your example, do you think that would increase or decrease the number of young people marrying?
How about just making young men and women acknowledge a warning like this: "If you agree to marry this person, and stay married for ten years, you WILL very likely be required to pay them $1000 or more per month in alimony, for the rest of your life, regardless of why you divorce, even if they are the ones cheating and filing for divorce."
What would the impact of this warning be on the marriage rate?
Last edited by West of Encino; 02-06-2013 at 10:53 AM..
Well, that would be a ridiculous warning because it simply wouldn't be true, generally speaking OR in most states.
OK. The latest stats in New Jersey are that lifetime alimony is awarded in 15% of divorces.
"If you agree to marry this person, and stay married for ten years, there is a 15% chance you will be required to pay them $1000 or more per month in alimony, for the rest of your life, regardless of why you divorce, even if they are the ones cheating and filing for divorce."
A lot of females put on a good act when meeting men. Some will say they don't believe in divorce, but you know they're lying. They may be the perfect one but once they get married, their true colors begin to show.
No-fault divorce is probably the worst thing that ever passed.
I agree that no-fault divorce isn't good for society as a whole but I think it needed to pass. We live in a free country and we have to make some sacrifices to maintain that freedom. Sometimes the needs of the one need to outweigh the needs of the many in order to maintain a free nation.
OK. The latest stats in New Jersey are that lifetime alimony is awarded in 15% of divorces.
"If you agree to marry this person, and stay married for ten years, there is a 15% chance you will be required to pay them $1000 or more per month in alimony, for the rest of your life, regardless of why you divorce, even if they are the ones cheating and filing for divorce."
I think the marriage rate would drop like a rock.
Seems like the divorce courts in New Jersey are as bad as they are in California. Alimony is basically a scam and feminist enslavement. Marriage isn't even sacred with the government involved.
Last edited by West of Encino; 02-06-2013 at 12:15 PM..
No, not all, but a great number of them. And an FYI, since you seem to be confused here - I'm not looking for your approval. lol
You made an all inclusive statement, I called you on it. That has nothing to do with confusion or approval. It has to do with pointing out your bias in a public forum. If it had anything to do with a sincere interest in you or your life, I would have sent you a direct message.
I'm sure paying the ex who cheated on you "only" $1700 a month after taxes for life (seriously, how often is alimony terminated for reasons other than remarriage? Almost never.) is just fine with most people.
Seriously.
Let me ask you this, since the topic is " Young men are giving up on marriage". If everyone had to take a test before getting a marriage license, and one of the test questions was to calculate the alimony in your example, do you think that would increase or decrease the number of young people marrying?
How about just making young men and women acknowledge a warning like this: "If you agree to marry this person, and stay married for ten years, you WILL very likely be required to pay them $1000 or more per month in alimony, for the rest of your life, regardless of why you divorce, even if they are the ones cheating and filing for divorce."
What would the impact of this warning be on the marriage rate?
Actually, it wouldnt be a bad idea to test people on the divorce law in their state before a license is issued.
I've always favored a marriage class for HS students where they are required to have a fake marriage, jobs, expenses and budget and fake kid. Divorce law and proceedings should also be included in the classes. Maybe if kids learn what is really involved in a marriage, financially and otherwise, they will take marriage more seriously.
A lot of females put on a good act when meeting men. Some will say they don't believe in divorce, but you know they're lying. They may be the perfect one but once they get married, their true colors begin to show.
No-fault divorce is probably the worst thing that ever passed.
I'm not fond of no-fault divorce either. I'm not fond of divorce. But you know, it happens. It happened to me. If I'd let myself just dwell on the fact that it happened to me, I'd have turned into a mess. Granted, it's a million times more complicated when there are kids involved.
However, I think EVERYONE is on their best behavior when they meet people. Can you imagine if people all let their guard down on meeting people? You don't know them yet, you don't know what sort of person they are, how to react to them, etc. You can't do that anywhere. With friends you meet for the first time, at job interviews, first day at a job, when meeting future in-laws, when meeting people in a group you belong to, or anywhere. At first and until you feel fully comfortable, you can't let yourself be completely you, and even when you know people you still shouldn't let yourself be that open. It's got to go slow. Put your best foot forward, and go slow. Present yourself as nice as possible, as first impressions are very important, but go sloooow.
There are things that should be reserved. Don't you agree? Don't you hold back when meeting new people, or are you just all out there all the time?
I've always favored a marriage class for HS students where they are required to have a fake marriage, jobs, expenses and budget and fake kid. Divorce law and proceedings should also be included in the classes. Maybe if kids learn what is really involved in a marriage, financially and otherwise, they will take marriage more seriously.
I like that a lot. I'd also like kids in h.s. to playact having a child, so they could see it's not just a matter of having sex, and the rest gets taken care of by others.
OK. The latest stats in New Jersey are that lifetime alimony is awarded in 15% of divorces.
"If you agree to marry this person, and stay married for ten years, there is a 15% chance you will be required to pay them $1000 or more per month in alimony, for the rest of your life, regardless of why you divorce, even if they are the ones cheating and filing for divorce."
I think the marriage rate would drop like a rock.
OK - you can tell that to the people in New Jersey. That is INAPPLICABLE to the people in most other states.
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