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california,
please stop trying be rational to an irrational person. I'd really hate for you to waste good advice on someone who has another agenda. This poster has been doing this for a long time now. If you'll notice, she cherrypicks her responses, largely ignoring everything else. It's like talking to a brick wall. Her topics are clearly divisive, hoping to stir up a colorism flame war. This topic will probably be closed by a mod, just like all of the others.
Right you are, i am beginning to see a pattern here, reading thru her many comments. I just think it is useless in life to ***** about something, anything, that you yourself refuse to do anything about. No matter what it is you ***** about! Or something you refuse to do anything about. Useless.
Go head and gripe, but then stop feeling sorry for youself, pick yourself up and do something about it.
If you were a role model for little dark skinned black girls, there would be no hope for them. I HOPE there aren't little dark skinned girls around you, because they will grow up with the same issues.
Honestly every brown-dark skinned black girl grows up with these issues but you are taking it to another level.
Where do you live anyway, that you feel like everyone around you thinks dark skinned women are the scum of the earth? Where are your parents, do they know you feel this way? Does your family also give off the vibe that dark skinned girls are not ideal, because you give the impression that your town, family and so called friends ALL think that dark skinned women are horrible.
If you are so against how the media portrays dark skinned women and how people around you prefer light skinned women, you need to leave the USA. With the history of this country, everyone is conditioned to "like" or "prefer" light skinned/white women over brown skinned/dark women. That is definitely true.
Honestly changing your skin tone is not going to help. Bleaching yourself is not going to help. I used to want to bleach myself but I got tired of feeling ugly and feeling unwanted and not liking myself. I decided I am who I am and I look how I look. I am proud to be dark skinned and a Nigerian woman.
You need a change of scenery, you need to be in a more diverse atmosphere. If someone were to stop you randomly in the middle of the day and compliment you on your beautiful skin tone, will you still feel the way you feel? If so, that is not the problem, you just have very low self esteem and you need professional help. Maybe you should start learning the true history of us as a people so that you can appreciate, who you are and where you've come from, thus making you appreciate how you look.
Be honest with yourself and find out the real problems with your self image issues and where they stem from. You may not think this, but any other dark skinned girl who might be having some image issues who sees your posts and how you think can start to feel the same way as you do. Do you want every dark skinned girl to feel exactly as you do? Do you think it would be productive for all of us dark skinned girls to have a skin bleaching party and rid the world of our skin tone? Don't you think it would be better to try and change people's view of us and be proud of who we are and show people the beauty in us, rather than try and live up to a standard that says we are not beautiful?
I think you should really consider these questions and stop pitying yourself and what you were BLESSED with. In some places we are considered rare, like diamonds. If you don't see yourself as beautiful, who will?
Well, lets be honest here. There is a "standard of beauty" which usually puts lighter skin at the top, and darker skin at the bottom. There is some science in the standard, and there is also cultural patterns which have set the standard.
For instance, as a general rule, men are attracted to women who are slightly lighter than them. And women tend to be attracted to men who are slightly darker than them.
On top of that, there are certain more "feminine" attributes, such as breast size, hip/waist ratio, shoulder width, "softness", and many facial features. Where men tend to be attracted to more feminine attributes, and women are attracted to more masculine attributes. These attributes exist because of the existence or absence of testosterone.
When we discuss "light-skin" or "mixed-race", I think what we are more needing to discuss, is African vs Caucasian features, and then try to define what is beauty.
Let me start out by saying, there are many dark-skinned women who are very attractive. But I will say that, on average, African women tend to be more masculine in appearance than Caucasian women. Also, men tend to be more attracted to straight(or wavy) hair and light eyes. And since mixed-race people tend to have more of a Caucasian look, they tend to be considered to be more attractive.
With that said, it has absolutely nothing to do with the color of someones skin, and doesn't necessarily have to do with being of mixed-race(I've seen some very unattractive mixed-race people, I think African features on light skin just looks weird, go look up albino Africans if you don't know what I mean). What it does have to do with is, is just general attractiveness. And I think when people talk about "mixing the races". It reminds me of what people call it in some parts of the world, which is "whitening up".
The problem in my mind is that, it is really a difficult situation to resolve. Because some groups of people are just less attractive than others. I mean, would you want to be a man from Southeast Asia? In fact, it is pretty common these days for Asians to have mixed-race white babies as well. A large percentage of Asians models are actually "Eurasians", or half white-half Asian.
Anyway, I would consider myself white, but most people say I almost look Turkish(I'm actually mostly German/British, with a bit of Cherokee Indian). One of my friends claim that I look a lot like Joe Rogan(he is Italian).
I used to be pretty obsessed with the concept of being white. But really, it has sort of lost its meaning to me. I mean, I thought it would be pretty cool to move to Europe, but now the idea of moving to Europe basically makes me cringe.
With that said, I sort of feel like uploading a pic of me I took today. I guess I will... Its not a very good picture, I haven't shaved in a while so you can see my grey hairs popping out of my beard, and I look tired.
If you were a role model for little dark skinned black girls, there would be no hope for them. I HOPE there aren't little dark skinned girls around you, because they will grow up with the same issues.
Honestly every brown-dark skinned black girl grows up with these issues but you are taking it to another level.
Where do you live anyway, that you feel like everyone around you thinks dark skinned women are the scum of the earth? Where are your parents, do they know you feel this way? Does your family also give off the vibe that dark skinned girls are not ideal, because you give the impression that your town, family and so called friends ALL think that dark skinned women are horrible.
If you are so against how the media portrays dark skinned women and how people around you prefer light skinned women, you need to leave the USA. With the history of this country, everyone is conditioned to "like" or "prefer" light skinned/white women over brown skinned/dark women. That is definitely true.
Honestly changing your skin tone is not going to help. Bleaching yourself is not going to help. I used to want to bleach myself but I got tired of feeling ugly and feeling unwanted and not liking myself. I decided I am who I am and I look how I look. I am proud to be dark skinned and a Nigerian woman.
You need a change of scenery, you need to be in a more diverse atmosphere. If someone were to stop you randomly in the middle of the day and compliment you on your beautiful skin tone, will you still feel the way you feel? If so, that is not the problem, you just have very low self esteem and you need professional help. Maybe you should start learning the true history of us as a people so that you can appreciate, who you are and where you've come from, thus making you appreciate how you look.
Be honest with yourself and find out the real problems with your self image issues and where they stem from. You may not think this, but any other dark skinned girl who might be having some image issues who sees your posts and how you think can start to feel the same way as you do. Do you want every dark skinned girl to feel exactly as you do? Do you think it would be productive for all of us dark skinned girls to have a skin bleaching party and rid the world of our skin tone? Don't you think it would be better to try and change people's view of us and be proud of who we are and show people the beauty in us, rather than try and live up to a standard that says we are not beautiful?
I think you should really consider these questions and stop pitying yourself and what you were BLESSED with. In some places we are considered rare, like diamonds. If you don't see yourself as beautiful, who will?
You win in all categories. iRockCupcakes for President!
She (he?) is keeping it hot on those of you all who make it very clear that you have an issue with black people (Kathryn Aragon, duttygal), and neither of you have a response for her. I have little energy to feed the bear in this thread continually; the OP's topic is boring and played. But it IS extremely telling and indicative of your own personal thoughts on blacks as a whole when you make statements about how you/your "biracial" children felt the most "angst" or what have you from blacks. You make it a point to say this, which further proves Cali's point that there are some internal issues within you all that arent too far from Nyanna's own demons. That's assuming that Nyanna is real...
The blacks are on the losing side of this battle. I suggest that you all do some self-evaluation. I dont have a problem that you date or love outside your race. But I do have a problem with continually perpetrating and pointing out about how much you've been done wrong by other blacks, as opposed to whites....
Thanks (and I'm a she)
I will always call these types out on their blatant hypocrisy. And there is absolutely a deep denial and a sort of "Disneyland" delusional quality to the posts of both individuals. And one in particular has repeatedly used the biracial children to justify numerous backhanded and bigoted comments.
He's biracial. To add insult to injury to the OP, he's also "lightskinned."
Besides that, I'm in the mood for an African American woman president.
Condalisa Rice?
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(and I'm a she)
