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Whenever "mail-order brides" comes up, there are always alot of people condemning the men as losers for having to resort to it.
Isn't that pretty rich in this era of online dating? People too scared or whatever to meet people in person that they have to look at a huge database of other losers? (social retards is the popular term) And what percentage of single people use dating sites? (one source says 40%)
I don't see much difference, one is for overseas dating, the other is for local dating. I'd give the former more respect because they are going after something that doesn't exist at home.
before I met my husband he was stationed in Bahrain. (I hope no one I know recognizes this story.) He met this Ethiopian girl there. Even after he left, he stayed in contact with her and they were trying to find ways to get her out here so they could be together. she told him she didn't want to go back to Ethiopia, because she didn't want to be away from her sisters in Bahrain, but she was willing to go to the USA and be even further away from her sisters. a lot of her story didn't add up, but he was too naïve to admit it to himself. anyways, long story short, he met me and we started getting serious. We were living together and a letter from the state department came saying that they denied his bid for a marriage visa. he told me that they had applied for one before he met me. she called the house one day and he told her it was over.
well guess what? she tells him she had already gotten a visa granted to marry another guy that she was talking to while she was talking to him. these foreign women aren't as innocent and honest as they seem.
and let me add that I lived in 2 cities with a sizeable east African community, San Diego and Las Vegas. You almost never see Ethiopian women living here in the states with black American men. it's like once they get here they're all about preserving their culture.
Doesn't your story tell you why these women keep their options open? They never know when the man who claims to love them will forget about them once he gets back home.
How you meet them is how you lose them......just saying.
that's what they say. one can only hope. I'm going to get the house, the kids, and half of his military retirement and I'll be able to sleep with who ever I want.
Doesn't your story tell you why these women keep their options open? They never know when the man who claims to love them will forget about them once he gets back home.
that's the risk you take whether you live in Africa or the US.
Because there is no requirement for them to tell the truth and no punishment for lying. Even in cases where the man is abusive - something the woman should have figured out - I don't think they should be getting special rights. The gov is here to serve the US citizens.
"something the woman should have figured out?"
Seriously?
Do men wear signs now stating that they are abusive?
Please do explain how women are supposed to figure this out, particularly in a mail-order situation.
Whenever "mail-order brides" comes up, there are always alot of people condemning the men as losers for having to resort to it.
Isn't that pretty rich in this era of online dating? People too scared or whatever to meet people in person that they have to look at a huge database of other losers? (social retards is the popular term) And what percentage of single people use dating sites? (one source says 40%)
I don't see much difference, one is for overseas dating, the other is for local dating. I'd give the former more respect because they are going after something that doesn't exist at home.
My sister's brother-in-law married his mail-order bride 25 years ago, and they are still very happy together.
My experience has been that people are people, no matter where they come from. There are home grown American girls who cheat, lie and divorce their husbands. You have about as much luck marrying a mail-order bride, and having a long life together, as you do marrying your childhood, high school sweetheart.
Do men wear signs now stating that they are abusive?
Please do explain how women are supposed to figure this out, particularly in a mail-order situation.
Abusers tend to show signs, foreign or domestic, the signs are the same. Dating overseas isn't much different that dating in the US. Of course, some aspects are such as customs, but getting to know someone is fairly universal.
Abusers tend to show signs, foreign or domestic, the signs are the same. Dating overseas isn't much different that dating in the US. Of course, some aspects are such as customs, but getting to know someone is fairly universal.
the guy that bought his mail ordered bride in Philippines never found out she was bipolar either.
The one problem with a relationship with a partner from a foreign country, communications. Good for you, you nailed it. My wife is from the PI and her spoken english carries a accent and the rules of speech get lost in the translation. Her written english is better than most if not all english speaking Americans I know. If some one needs help with writing at her work they come to see her. She has to consciously addrees the rules of the language at every turn and that makes her writing impeccable. In speaking we still have gaps and mis understanding but our lives are so full otherwise that it is worth it to allow each other to be lazy in our communicatioins.
I do know many Chinese women who have married American, learned English and they have great relationships and not much problem with communications. Since we know that communication is central in any interpersoanl relationship I have to think that if its a small issue with my wife whos English is pretty good it may be more of an issue with a partner who is just starting to learn english
Communication is the O-N-L-Y issue in these relationships, all other aspects can be a positive opportunity with fantastic outcomes with the right attitudes
Quote:
Originally Posted by Wapasha
How can the man marry a woman when they do not even speak the same language?
Even when people do speak the same language, if they come from different cultural backgrounds, they can have fights over cultural misunderstandings. Here we have both cultural and language problems.
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