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I'm seeing letting go of some people as healthy boundaries.
Bravo or brava.
I simply say, "Oh look their serving Martinis..." And swim to the other side
of the social pool." And don't go back...." And be done with them.
It takes them awhile to notice my absence.
When you have to be in their company and conversation turns to gay bashing
you simply look at your watch and with food still in your mouth, say...."Gotta Run".
After a few Thanksgivings of pushing your chair out and leaving, they get the picture.
Either you won't be invited or someone will get kicked under the table when a comment is made...
Slowly they come around.
The other extreme is not good for anyone..the world...puppies...
overall mental health to think of or call people trash, bottom feeders, tho they may be.
In other words anger doesn't get people very far.
It is with love...ok, can't muster that? Then, finesse and diplomacy that
will eventually soften people's veiws.
It's the Southern way, I can't help it....
Honey....vinegar....I choose honey, sometimes with a flyswatter around if necessary, with a
Mimosa in your hand.
Cool heads rule... I hope diplomacy is used later.....make em miss you...the sweet, funny,
kind, generous, fun you.
They won't miss the angry name calling you...I can tell ya that already.
There s a phrase in the Bible ...about heaping coals on them (your transgressors)...just so happens
the coals are
kindness and forgiveness....but they are still coals....it really bugs 'em...way more
than anger...because it shows them they are fools.
Their soul knows they are wrong...ok....way deep down there somewhere.
I'm going to be clear too. LGBTers like you are the reason many people can't stand LGBTers.
My daughter is gay and we love her and her girlfriend of 7 years, no matter what.
There are some people in the family who don't agree with the lifestyle, but my daughter and her girlfriend understand that and they don't push them or get in their face about it, because they have some respect.
They scoff at people like you, and others who run around with rainbow shirts screaming I'M GAY EFF YOU IF YOU DON'T LIKE IT, because they see them as a detriment to getting people to accept their lifestyle. It's kind of like religion, the more you try to shove it down people's throats the more closed off they become.
Y'all might think those people don't like you because you are LGBT, but I'd be willing to wager they don't like you because of your attitude.
What would you consider pushing it or getting in their face? Does the GF come to family functions? Is she treated like any other SO or spouse?
I don't know why some people feel they have the right to demand and insist that other people 'accept' and 'support' their own particular personal preferences, to shove it in their faces and then have a tantrum if those other people don't immediately decide that whatever little Jane or Johnny does is 'OK' with them.
I wonder how the OP would feel if his/her mother/father/sibling suddenly confessed a preference for Great Danes and demanded immediate support and acceptance of it? All of the arguments applied to "LGBT" can be applied equally well to bestiality.
It is illogical and inconsiderate to insist and demand that other people accept and support ones own opinion/preference, without giving equal consideration to *their* right to have their *own* opinions. This applies in other areas as well- political, religious, whatever.
I am a staunch atheist while my mother is a devout Baptist bible-thumper. Do I accept and support her 'preference'? Not a chance. Does she accept and support *my* position? Again, not a chance. But we respect each other's right to our own opinions and don't try to jam them down the other's throat- she doesn't tell me I'm going to hell and I don't tell her she is insanely deluded. We still have a good relationship, we simply do not discuss our [contentious] beliefs. I'm not likely to change her mind, and she isn't going to change mine. It would be stupid for me to attempt to browbeat her into 'accepting' my position and 'disown' her if she doesn't.
Despite all of the attempts to insist that the general public accept alternative sexual preferences, these alternatives are still a minority and the majority does not 'accept' them. I fully support the right of other people to do whateverthehell they please, as long at it isn't hurting someone else...but that doesn't mean that they have the right to jam it down everyone else's throat and demand that they 'support' it, that *is* hurting someone else. People can do what they want, but that doesn't mean that other people have to like it.
Absolutely great post! That issue becomes accepting the behavior and not accepting the person. What they want is acceptance of their lifestyle so that they will feel better but sorry, I won't feel better about myself if I compromise my beliefs so you are on your own. Even on C-D the threads are always an attempt to make everyone put a stamp of approval on the lifestyles/behaviors. I am SO tired of the threads being repeated again and again. Every possible angle has been explored here if someone wants to do a search. I think it is a great idea to just avoid people that don't agree with the way you lead your life but keep in mind that is going to be very isolating. Keep your sexuality out of my face as I don't want to know one way or the other.
Does the GF come to family functions? Is she treated like any other SO or spouse?
She sure is. She's the son we never had!
In fact, we have a lifelong family friend whom we would always go to their house for holidays and birthdays. When his wife's son came out as gay, he went nuts and threw him out of the house. We have never gone back to their house, because we know he would not accept my daughter and her girlfriend, and frankly we don't care to associate with people like that.
Absolutely great post! That issue becomes accepting the behavior and not accepting the person. What they want is acceptance of their lifestyle so that they will feel better but sorry, I won't feel better about myself if I compromise my beliefs so you are on your own. Even on C-D the threads are always an attempt to make everyone put a stamp of approval on the lifestyles/behaviors. I am SO tired of the threads being repeated again and again. Every possible angle has been explored here if someone wants to do a search. I think it is a great idea to just avoid people that don't agree with the way you lead your life but keep in mind that is going to be very isolating. Keep your sexuality out of my face as I don't want to know one way or the other.
Then why do you keep going to those threads? That speaks of you personally and not the other people who are participating in those threads.
Then why do you keep going to those threads? That speaks of you personally and not the other people who are participating in those threads.
Actually, no, that speaks to the volumes of people in the threads who feel they need to shove it in people's faces.
Don't go to those threads? How do you know it's going to start out like that unless they post "I AM GAY AND IN YOUR FACE" as the title?
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