Shot Gun Wedding- is this a stigma in the year 2014? (Maine, doctor)
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I know several people who have been married and divorced, or lived together and split apart.
About the only thing that seems to be different is the property, not the child support, not anything else like that.
If a woman decides to enter into a cohabitation arrangement without marriage, they need to make sure they are on all property obtained together, so that they can be split. If a man were to buy a house and live with a woman who then had children, if he asks her to leave, she has no right to the property unless she had her named assigned to the deed.
Even the tax write off is outweighed by many others you get as HoH for instance.
Marriage in the 21st century just doesn't make sense. You can get all of the same legal rights and protections through signing contracts, not being married. You're actually a lot better off with individual contracts, instead of marriage.
So, your belief is that US society and all that entails (child poverty rate, education, etc.) is better now than when marriage was standard?
Which is really what this thread is about.
A note about contracts, yeah they would be good but most people don't think of them. The marriage license is a de facto contract.
Back in "my day" if someone got pregnant and
then quickly got married people would talk and judge the person poorly. They
called it ashot gun wedding.
Yes, I know lots of people are
having babies and not even married and having sex before marriage. But in your
circle of friends and family is getting pregnant before you get married bad, or
just part of life in the 21st Century? Please respond to my poll!
They would judge the WOMAN poorly. The men got a pass and weren't expected to save themselves for marriage. Thank God those days are gone.
Back in "my day" if someone got pregnant and then quickly got married people would talk and judge the person poorly. They called it a shot gun wedding.
Yes, I know lots of people are having babies and not even married and having sex before marriage. But in your circle of friends and family is getting pregnant before you get married bad, or just part of life in the 21st Century? Please respond to my poll!
In my circle of friends and family, the majority just want the child to be loved and be well taken care of. Yeppers, I think it's a 21st century thing.
Unwed mothers are still not the norm, as less than 40% of annual births are born to unwed American mothers. The higher the education, the lower the rate of births to unwed mothers. 57 percent of women without a high school degree were unmarried when they gave birth, compared to 8.8 percent of women with a bachelor's degree or more.
To assume the institution of marriage is dead is also wrong.
Marriage is the norm for educated people. Among women with a bachelor's degree, 60 percent are married, compared with less than 30 percent among those who never graduated high school.
"New research by the sociologist Leslie McCall reveals that while marriage rates have fallen for most women since 1980, those for the highest earning women have increased, to 64 percent in 2010 from 58 percent in 1980." NYTimes, The Disestablishment of Marriage, By STEPHANIE COONTZ
Published: June 22, 2013
There are major drawbacks to getting married, especially considering that you have a 50/50 shot of ending it in divorce.
Its much easier financially simply to live together as two separate individuals. Marriage is an antiquated institution with no real purpose anymore, except tradition.
I respectfully suggest that you investigate the laws regarding "Common Law Marriage" in your state.
It would behoove anybody who chooses to "just live together" to know those laws.
Since I don't know what the laws are in your state, I won't say more than that.
I respectfully suggest that you investigate the laws regarding "Common Law Marriage" in your state.
It would behoove anybody who chooses to "just live together" to know those laws.
Since I don't know what the laws are in your state, I won't say more than that.
No common law marriage in the state of Tennessee, in fact, most states have abolished the practice
Back in "my day" if someone got pregnant and then quickly got married people would talk and judge the person poorly. They called it a shot gun wedding.
Yes, I know lots of people are having babies and not even married and having sex before marriage. But in your circle of friends and family is getting pregnant before you get married bad, or just part of life in the 21st Century? Please respond to my poll!
I'm very liberal and take a libertarian approach to social issues, but I do not approve of people having children outside of marriage. I don't say that to friends who have had children outside of marriage and I don't treat them badly, and I wouldn't support punishing them for it...but I think it's less than ideal.
I didn't vote because your poll lacks the choice I would make -
Their decision, none of my business.
Most people get married for a combination of reasons, they don't need me to approve of those reasons.
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