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Yes I am mixed race. I was trying to tie a fact to my question so that others can have a better understanding of where I am coming from. I suppose it wasn't well received.
Oh...ok...then that makes more sense to me. I would not expect a black person, who is not bi-racial, to offer that his father is black....you would not need to. Not that it matters though.....but I still have my doubts about your story. I mean, it's the conservative mantra to attack the black male as an irresponsible father.
Because some facts don't fit well. The child support thing especially is noticeable since most people DO in fact ask for it. I would be very curious why your grandparents decided to not ask for it-Thats support for you that you deserved, why did they not do so? It sounds like the sort of thing you do to make sure someone doesn't get involved. Yes I have seen this "if you show up, or get involved we will go after you for child support" is not an unusual way to keep people away.
And...well the area you posted this in has some posters who....believe race relations were much better in the 1900's.
Well sadly, my grandparents did not ask him for it, never bothered to take him to court, and my mother (she was in and out of the picture) also did not ask for it. I do not have any explanantion as to why, because it baffles me too. There are many questions that have been left unanswered in my upbringing, so sorry if my story makes little sense.
Yeah that would certainly add to it. Course having a record often results in the poor part...and often vice versa.
The difference between the two is that poor is generally a temporary state. The record is what perpetuates generational poverty. That's how the criminal injustice system screws black male fathers, especially.
I know lots of messed up adults who were abused by addict/alcoholic/violent fathers. They all wish their fathers were absent. Back when I was a child, fathers (and parents, in general) got away with a lot of stuff that would get them locked up today.
My father is Black. He was absent for my entire life; I was raised by my grandparents. He made up every excuse in the book as to why he was absent which insulted my intellignece even as a child. I knew he was lying to me. The final blow is when he made up an excuses on why he could attend my college graduation. I finally grew tired of his excuses and cut my ties with him several years ago once and for all, which included legally changing my surname. It was a great decision because I spent years trying to gain his acceptance only to be continuously fed lies and excuses.
What is disturbing to me is that I have met more black people than I care to remember that also have absent fathers. I do not feel that every black man abandons his responsibilities, because that is not true, but I have certainly noticed a pattern.
The question I pose to you is: Why do absentee fathers seem to be more prevalent in the black community? What do you feel attributes to this issue?
I want to gain a little more insight on this.
Absent fathers are a problem for any child no matter black or white. I've seen it with a very good friend and a relative and it is effected them in negatives ways. It is very hurtful in many ways.
My father is Black. He was absent for my entire life; I was raised by my grandparents. He made up every excuse in the book as to why he was absent which insulted my intellignece even as a child. I knew he was lying to me. The final blow is when he made up an excuses on why he could attend my college graduation. I finally grew tired of his excuses and cut my ties with him several years ago once and for all, which included legally changing my surname. It was a great decision because I spent years trying to gain his acceptance only to be continuously fed lies and excuses.
What is disturbing to me is that I have met more black people than I care to remember that also have absent fathers. I do not feel that every black man abandons his responsibilities, because that is not true, but I have certainly noticed a pattern.
The question I pose to you is: Why do absentee fathers seem to be more prevalent in the black community? What do you feel attributes to this issue?
I want to gain a little more insight on this.
Is it a black problem...... not really
its a liberal problem, with their 'freelove' and ' who needs a man' attitude, their 'lets give you unending welfare , based on how many kids you have out of wedlock' policies and their war on marriage
doesn't matter about black, white, Hispanic.....but it sure is a impoverished peoples problem more often than from middle or upper-class families
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