Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
For example, think about the fact that violent computer games are extremely popular now. And who plays them, mostly? If you guessed girls, you get an F on the quiz.
And from there, all the assorted Trump attitude problems we (even many conservatives) know. Apparently a society does reveal its values by who it nominates as its leaders - and heroes in general.
I am by NO means a liberal--IMO, modern "liberalism" embraces the essential tenets of evil. And I am by no means a coward. But it annoys me to no end that so many people feel that men are "supposed to be" what boils down to Neanderthals. Men are supposed to be unthinking, violent, overly-competitive, quick-tempered, domineering ape-like animals. It's especially annoying when I read or hear women expressing this attitude. I see it as an obvious put down because I find all of those qualities that men are "supposed to be" undesirable in general--basically the effects of a low IQ. As a man, I've rarely felt or exhibited any of those qualities, and when I have, I later regretted it and chalked it up to a momentary lapse into the depths of stupidity or the "Neanderthal" in me coming out.
I see people as individuals, not categories. Personally, for me, it's always been about art, music, the written word, science, history, and such. That's what I've pursued all of my life. I've never been interested in sports, fighting (individuals), competition, domination, alpha-male nonsense activities, etc. To me, a total waste of the time we have on this planet. I don't think that makes me any less a "man." And if it does, then I don't want to be one (at least not your version).
For me, it's all about the individual. If you are a woman MMA fighter, that's not my thing and doesn't appeal to me in the least, but I'm cool with it. If you are a man who is into romance novels and knitting, that's fine with me as well. That's not to say I, as an individual, approve or disapprove of any of it. But it's not my call. I believe in liberty and agency, and I also understand the danger of societally imposed "norms." Look at the middle east, for instance, to see where your male and female stereotypes ultimately lead a society--you basically have a society of slaves and alpha males in many regions.
So if you, as a woman, need to have a brainless "tough guy" Neanderthal in your life, go find one. But do not insult the entire population of men on the planet by proclaiming that they all should be cavemen and that's what they are genetically/socially predisposed to be. That attitude smacks of elitism--an ivory tower attitude.
Truly, that stereotype of men as being brainless oafs who can't even string a coherent sentence together is VERY annoying. This view that men have to keep everything inside, that expressing emotion, especially the softer ones like love, sadness, sympathy, and such makes a man weak. If a man shows a woman how much he cares, shows her his soft side, he gets labeled a "beta" (wtfe ) and terms like doormat get tossed out.
If being a man has to use the standards you listed I agree wholeheartedly that personally I'd change it up a bit. Treating women like bond servatns, ignoring the fact she has feelings that require a man's strength to prop her up when things get tough. By the stereotypical standard he would tell her to ruck up and quit whining when what she needs is to be supported. , encouraged, maybe even (oh the horror) held close and loved.
Why it is that so many men feel they have to treat every situation as if they're in combat and everything in front of them needs to be destroyed makes me wonder how they could maintain a relationship beyond a one night stand. Then there's this thing that it's a man's job to fix everything. Sorry guys, that's not a good approach. Especially when it comes to supporting ones mate trying to "fix" things is more often than not doomed to failure. She's a woman, not a car. More often than not she just needs you to just listen. Really listen. Let her get it out. She doesn't need her man to interrupt her with solutions.
Do women really want the tough guy caveman as the other half of themselves? Some inarticulate bull chimpanzee with the emotional depth of a single celled organism? Perhaps some do, but I'd like to give women more credit than tbat. On the flipside do men want a woman who is little more than an object in their life? Remember that old movie Soylent Green where men called women "furniture" and traded them off for a different model when they got bored?
I really don't u Der stand this fear that many men have of admitting they have feelings. That maybe, just maybe, they might need the lady in their life to support and encourage them. I have always seen the interactions between men and women as a symbiotic phenomena. Like night and day or cold and hot. One can't exist and fulfill a purpose without the other. I've only ever had one relationship that worked that way as I think about it though. It's a rare and precious thing to find. A marriage of 20 years failed to evolve into anything even close. My ex didn't want a Neanderthal, she wanted a personal servant with high skill levels, that she could second guess and criticize to satisfy her ego.
It does seem that societal standards run on objectification and materialism. And there's this huge pressure to become cemented in a relationship, that rushes things and often ends up in failure . And that failure can be a breeding ground for bitterness and jading for both men and women. Sadly, I don't see these societal standards and expectations shifting to a more productive and truly satisfying methodology. The best that those of us who disdain the stereotypes can do is to stick to our guns and dare to be different. There's nothing wrong with a man who's not afraid to cry, to tell his lady how much he loves her, who maybe writes poetry for her and who leans on her for support and encouragement as much as she leans on him. Being a man does not mean that you bury your feelings, hold everything in. All that does is create a pressure cooker. A water heater with the safety relief valve plugged off. The end result is a seriously destructive explosion. One that can ruin a relationship. One that can ruin you as a man. Something to think about...
So your opinion in what is a real man is based on tradition, appearance and style alone?
I like to reply to all questions that I see asked of me. However some are clearly by people intentionally being obtuse.
I will assume yours does not fit that category.
"Style" alone does not make a man, but the actors I mentioned had principles they would not discard for the almighty dollar.
For example, there was a movie where John Wayne's character was suppose to shoot another guy in the back, and he refused to do it.
He said I have never played a role where someone was so cowardly as to be a back shooter, and I am not going to start now.
The director relented, and Wayne's character did not shoot the person in the back.
My point is that while some hetero men might dress up like homos/trannys, real old school men never would.
Yet it does not keep liberal Hollywood from trying to brainwash men into thinking doing such things will not diminish their masculinity.
Two quick examples;
In a Seinfeld episode, Elaine says to George "you know, just saying another man is attractive, does not mean you are gay" and George retorts "it doesn't help".
Also look at this commercial where a Dad dresses up like a fairy princess, and the implication is there is nothing wrong with it.
Of course liberals will say there is nothing wrong with it, and start some talking point about anyone who does not think like they do is a latent homo.
Rest assured a lot of brainwashing, both avert/subliminal and overt brainwashing is going on to make men think such things are ok and normal.
Feminism, as per Merriam-Webster means: “the belief that men and women should have equal rights and opportunities”. Nowhere does that translate to male bashing. Hating men is termed misandry, not feminism.
Just because some people mask their personal opinions as feminism, does not kill the essence of it. It sure hampers it and causes misunderstandings.
I don't remember who said it, Women empowerment does not mean pulling men back. It means walking together.
Feminism, as per Merriam-Webster means: “the belief that men and women should have equal rights and opportunities”. Nowhere does that translate to male bashing. Hating men is termed misandry, not feminism.
Just because some people mask their personal opinions as feminism, does not kill the essence of it. It sure hampers it and causes misunderstandings.
I don't remember who said it, Women empowerment does not mean pulling men back. It means walking together.
Yes. Feminism helped us by letting women have opportunities for education, allowing us other choices in life besides the traditional roles. That caused problems and complications (babies in daycare, for example) but never mind that now.
Where feminism lost ME is when it started claiming females are SUPERIOR, and that men caused most of the world's problems, and men should try to be more like women.
Yeah, men caused the world's problems because they were in control, and women didn't have enough power to cause most of the big problems.
But men are NOT inferior, and men should NOT try to be more like women. That will only make them fake hypocrites, pretending to be what they are not.
FURTHERMORE -- this idea that women are superior helped cause the backlash that got Trump elected.
Yes. Feminism helped us by letting women have opportunities for education, allowing us other choices in life besides the traditional roles. That caused problems and complications (babies in daycare, for example) but never mind that now.
Where feminism lost ME is when it started claiming females are SUPERIOR, and that men caused most of the world's problems, and men should try to be more like women.
Yeah, men caused the world's problems because they were in control, and women didn't have enough power to cause most of the big problems.
But men are NOT inferior, and men should NOT try to be more like women. That will only make them fake hypocrites, pretending to be what they are not.
FURTHERMORE -- this idea that women are superior helped cause the backlash that got Trump elected.
Just because I helped women to be whatever they wanted to be does not make me any less male. As far as violence as part of being a man is concerned I just see it as being a psychotic unfit for civilized society. On the banks of the Mekong it can be a survival aid.
Just because I helped women to be whatever they wanted to be does not make me any less male. As far as violence as part of being a man is concerned I just see it as being a psychotic unfit for civilized society. On the banks of the Mekong it can be a survival aid.
That's right.
And if women didn't achieve the kind of heights they were hoping for, and still blamed it on YOU, it's not your fault.
Violence is for DEFENSE. In the past, before we lived under a gigantic all-powerful military state, people had to defend themselves. It was more often the men.
In primitive societies, men did most of the hunting, while women gathered plants for food and medicine. Men were usually the warriors.
This is deeply programmed into our genes.
If you can't see it, you are just another dumb science denier.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
) and terms like doormat get tossed out. 
