Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
I assume some of my friends probably have had some experiences but prefer to keep it to themselves and took care of it at the time. I, frankly, get tired of the "private" lives plastered all over the place. The Phil Donahue syndrome....we don't need to share nor know everything about everybody in such a public arena....in my humble opinion.
You are wrong. Raping another person is a violent act, because you are causing harm to them by forcing them physically to do something they do NOT want to do. Molestation is forcing yourself on someone physically, just as rape is. If you cannot see the violence in that , that is sad.
Perhaps an error in semantics but not every perpetrator has to use physical force to get them to do it meaning you've already said no but you did not put up a fight and just went along with it. It takes some skill as a sicko but it can be done without laying a hand on them before the act.
It doesn't change the fact it causes severe harm to a person but it's more mental at that point. I guess you could say there's a physical aspect because since you don't want it the body will close up.
The only reason I am picking on this is because often people will say something like this and mean that only people who are beaten up have suffered the damage..like if you only get coerced somehow it's not that big a deal so I just want to make it clear that even if there was no violence involved it is in the same category of sick behavior.
I am raising them to treat every person with respect. Respect for other people's ideas, thoughts, personhood, religion, etc. and other people's bodies and personal space.
I am a victim. I have no shame in saying that. Its one of the things I am. Since when did being a victim of someone else's crimes or bad behavior become something to be ashamed of?
It isn't. I think you misunderstood me. What I think is wrong is that many want to be and it has become the thing to be or the in thing. This just makes it worse for people who really are. I'm not on this thread to judge among those posting as to who is or who isn't.
I only meant to say I would want to teach a daughter to be more proactive and not silent should something happen to her. I also have sons.
Last edited by I love boots.; 10-19-2017 at 03:34 PM..
Without commenting on your mother specifically, I think responses like this were common in the past and probably still are. I had a wonderful, loving mother who also took this approach when someone assaulted my sister. Turns out, that was the response my grandmother had when the same person assaulted my mother when she was a teenager. A lot of moms were raised not to make waves and were taught to ignore their own assaults, so may have had a hard time speaking up or even evaluating how bad the situation was.
So many women and men have felt alone in being victims of harassment or assault. It helps to know they are not, and perhaps will give them the courage to take a stand, to report it, to do whatever they have to do in order to stop the behavior and to let the perpetrators know that there are consequences.
It's rare that I get to agree with you, but this is exactly what it's for. No one is asking people to feel sorry for them, they are speaking out for the reasons you just stated. I can't believe that some are so jaded that they have an issue with this.
As I said either here or on another thread, I was raped by several men in the same night. I was molested as a child. I've been masturbated in front of (in public) twice. I woke up to an ex-boyfriend masturbating in my face. I've had men flash their penis at me several times. I've had men ask to pay me money to sleep with them.
Additionally, I've had to ask a stranger to pretend to be my boyfriend in order to get a pervert to leave me alone. That's happened numerous times.
None of this is okay.
Its not okay.
Its not normal.
It has nothing to do with dating.
It has nothing to do with women not liking nice guys.
It has nothing to do with the media or the democrats trying to brainwash women into hating men.
This stuff happens to women ALL.THE.TIME.
(Not yelling at you CCbaxter, your post was simply a starting point for mine.)
I get it. I don't know if it was the way I was raised, or the place I was raised but I can no more imagine myself doing the things you mentioned than thinking I could fly. I'm not stupid, I know the world has sick people in it, but its much more common than I thought. I also can't imagine why people object to shining a light on it.
You were either not molested or you are so angry about your molestation that you cast victims of the same crime in a negative manner in order to separate yourself from them.
In either case, I'm very sorry for you and hope you find the healing you deserve.
Some don't seem to understand that "discussing" it is not "whining" about it. That's the type of attitude that causes some not to say anything at all....and then people ask: "Why didn't they say something?"
Democratic politicians, feminists and other activists are frustrated by the fact that many women are in positive relationships with men; as wives, mothers, daughters, sisters, etc., do not see themselves as victims of male oppression and exploitation, and do not need their help. The #metoo campaign is part of the continuing effort to remedy this.
I'm normally not a fan of memes and social media trends, and I don't follow them on FB, but #MeToo gave me the courage to finally share my own story.
In 1969, a doctor molested me while I was under his care. By molested, I mean he clearly and deliberately used my genitals to satisfy his physical pleasure. It was a very confusing experience for me, and I didn't know how to handle it. I sought treatment from another doctor. That doctor, a pillar in the local community, verbally shamed me for seeking care for a condition which it turned out had been worsened by the 1st doctor's molestation.
It took 48 years to find a forum for expressing the wrong that had been done to me.
#MeToo
THIS is what that campaign is about. No one should ever be shamed into silence, let alone for 48 fricken years when someone has hurt them.
Some don't seem to understand that "discussing" it is not "whining" about it. That's the type of attitude that causes some not to say anything at all....and then people ask: "Why didn't they say something?"
Exactly!
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
