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Technically, no. Lots of women get raped while they're passed out asleep due to drunkenness or exhaustion, or both. Did they suffer violence during the act? Maybe... but, not always.
It's a power thing, but if you're not conscious for it, I'm pretty sure it's not the same level of violent upset you feel if you're awake for it and fighting to keep some man off you.
Technically, no. Lots of women get raped while they're passed out asleep due to drunkenness or exhaustion, or both. Did they suffer violence during the act? Maybe... but, not always.
It's a power thing, but if you're not conscious for it, I'm pretty sure it's not the same level of violent upset you feel if you're awake for it and fighting to keep some man off you.
Um rape most definitely is a violent act. Any time someone violates you, with their body, in an unwanted way is a violent act. That's like saying if you were in a coma and someone beat the crap out of you, it's not violent because you were passed out and unconscious.
It's a power thing, but if you're not conscious for it, I'm pretty sure it's not the same level of violent upset you feel if you're awake for it and fighting to keep some man off you.
As someone who has been raped twice, once while unconscious, not having any control and not knowing what happened is far more upsetting to me then when I was awake.
I was drugged. I don't know what happened, so I can't say if it was "violent" or not.
The mocking and dismissiveness I've read in this thread is a good example of just some of the reasons women don't come forward. I am proud of all people who have chosen to speak up. It takes courage. It also takes courage just to survive and sometimes that is enough. I think society needs to be taught to see women as people. Both women and men often don't understand, don't care, and don't want to hear about sexual assault and sexual harassment because it is inconvenient for them to deal with. Try living with it.
Is there always what is perceived as physical violence attached to it? Nope.
I daresay people have been molested in more physically violent ways than people have been raped in some cases.
You cannot tell me that someone (let's say, a spouse, for the sake of argument) having sex with his wife while she's unconscious, yet not causing her any sort of physical damage other than non consensual sex, is more violent than someone holding a woman down and forcing his hands into her pants to grope her genitals while she kicks and screams.
Why's the former more violent than the latter? Because a penis was involved?
Is rape less violent if oral sex is forced onto someone?
You see my point?
I think that molestation and rape are violent in that they're about controlling people and not caring about permission, but not all people who have technically been raped (per the legal definition of rape) had any sort of violence (as we'd deem violence per the dictionary definition) done to them.
Doesn't make rape right. It's still very, very wrong.
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As someone who has been raped twice, once while unconscious, not having any control and not knowing what happened is far more upsetting to me then when I was awake.
I was drugged. I don't know what happened, so I can't say if it was "violent" or not.
Not saying it's not upsetting. It definitely is.
I think my point here was entirely lost.
I dislike people minimizing molestation because it's somehow "not as bad as rape."
I disagree.
I can tell you that molestation can be far worse. Ask someone who has experienced both.
It depends on the particular scenario.
Ex. Some random stranger in the park jumps a woman while she's walking home, kidnaps her, holds her at gunpoint and forces her to let him have sex with her, causing her much bruising, tearing, emotional damage, PTSD, you name it. Okay... same scenario, but it was a young girl in a park and the guy had a knife he put his hands in her pants while she cried and begged him to stop. Now... what about the woman who tells the guy she's been dating and/or was married to for years that she's not in the mood, but he still forces himself on her anyway and she doesn't want to do it, but she fears not letting him because he's got an anger problem. All those things are wrong. Not all of them are necessarily "violent." They are all VERY WRONG. I daresay the woman in the last example, while she might be disgusted and distrustful of men going forward, is likely less scarred by this than that little girl who didn't actually get raped. See?
So, no... I'm not dismissing rape. Hell no. I'm saying that being flippant about molestation is ridiculous.
Why talk about "degrees" by using terms. Is rape less rapey if the guy doesn't manage to fully penetrate the victim?
Nope.
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There are some awful stories posted here. I guess it's good to be aware, but these are way beyond harassment, they are assault. For many of those creeps a good kick in the groin would be a suitable response.
Is there always what is perceived as physical violence attached to it? Nope.
I daresay people have been molested in more physically violent ways than people have been raped in some cases.
You cannot tell me that someone (let's say, a spouse, for the sake of argument) having sex with his wife while she's unconscious, yet not causing her any sort of physical damage other than non consensual sex, is more violent than someone holding a woman down and forcing his hands into her pants to grope her genitals while she kicks and screams.
Why's the former more violent than the latter? Because a penis was involved?
Is rape less violent if oral sex is forced onto someone?
You see my point?
I think that molestation and rape are violent in that they're about controlling people and not caring about permission, but not all people who have technically been raped (per the legal definition of rape) had any sort of violence (as we'd deem violence per the dictionary definition) done to them.
Doesn't make rape right. It's still very, very wrong.
Wow. I honestly don’t even know what to say to this post. So I will just repeat what I said previously... you are wrong. Rape is a violent act period.
Face book aggravates me with 'crap' like that.
Any post that wants me to forward it for any reason, I consider spam.
I don't care to see religious or political posts on FB. I don't care about cute sayings or any other garbage that does little more than take up bandwidth.
I do enjoy seeing family and friends and their kids and accomplishments, when they get new homes, cars, jobs etc.
You entirely missed my point. I attempted to clarify. I'm at work and I realized later that typing a comment quickly into this thread was bound to lead to confusion.
Apologies for that one.
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