Quote:
Originally Posted by BigDGeek
I don't concern myself with it really; every once in a while I'll see someone out in public who I think is possibly trans, but I process that data and keep it inside my head where it belongs. I treat them with the same courtesy I treat everyone with. I do not believe that being "transsexual" is anything but a mental illness, but it's really none of my business. So I keep quiet out in the real world.
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There's a saying that goes with that "for those who need to know already know and those who don't don't need to ask".
I am the same way with gay people. As someone who is very pro gay, I would love to know if my gay dar is right yet again but in no way am I going to ask "excuse me are you gay?". That's one of the few times my poor excuse of a filter actually works..although I do display the thoughts in my body language because I start to get really smiley around a guy that shows to be gay but I try to contain myself.
I usually can tell myself when someone is trans just like I can tell when someone is gay but them telling me wouldn't change much and if they knew that I knew it might make them feel bad because they don't want to be seen that way so asking a stranger what they identify as is showing that you see something is "not right" about them.
Quote:
Originally Posted by LS Jaun
Like being able to identify who you are talking to?
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I get what you are saying but we don't have to always know. Online for example I can't often tell what someone's gender is and in many cases it wouldn't make a difference either way. In some subjects you should know the gender but in that case the poster would end up telling you if they thought it was important to the discussion. IRL is no different except you are more likely to know the person's name so you can always ask their name if you're not sure. A large percentage of the time the name should tell you. There are a few gender neutral names but they are not the norm.
But if it's just someone you're passing by like a clerk what they identify as is not relevant so you don't need to know their name or their gender and just looks creepy if you start asking them questions like that
Quote:
Originally Posted by moneill
I'm running into the issue of how can you tell someone they are an idiot without it being a real insult.
Some people are idiots.....and they should be told. Obviously not enough people tell them but somebody has to -- their family and friends just let them be idiots......somebody needs to let them know.
But if you do -- you risk hurting their feelings.
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This is even more common now that people have voted for you know who. Every time you get into the discussion about someone being wrong it ends up being an argument.
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