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Actually, you mentioned that you said "preference". I had to wonder what kind of views you held based on the user name that you picked. And this is about one's views in terms of being a racist or not.
Yes, but that's not what you originally wrote and why I zeroed in on it. With that, I think we all agree, based on the definition of racism, preferring your kids marry someone of the same race is natural, expected, and not racist.
Let's take it one step further. Is preferring to live (same neighborhood, schools, community, churches) with people of your own race, racist?
No because your criteria is not race. Preferring individuals because they share your religion is religious bigotry not racial bigotry. Preferring people because they share your race is racial bigotry - and it's exactly what I wrote.
Let's cut the crap - if you favor people who share your race, you automatically disfavor those who don't. You judge people based on their race is racism.
Ultimately the essence is do we judge by appearance? The answer is a resounding YES! I can guarantee that if your spouse/partner was two points lower on your 10 scale, even though you're completely mentally complimentary, and are BFF's too, you'd not be married (and this doesn't matter whether you're male or female).
So we need to determine whether, it's acceptable to judge by appearance in general, and if it is, then which if any classifications of appearance are not acceptable to judge by, and why. For example, can we judge someone who has tattoos? Do we place certain categories on that person, with no evidence other than they have ink?
Sorry, but I disagree with the above.
First, I have been married three times, and as long as a man was not physically repulsive, looks did not matter nearly to the degree you state they do. Although I did not rate them at the time, I have dated men I would have rated '4's' to '8's looking back', and my husbands were a 5, a 5, and a 7 when I married them. My current husband was the '7', but he could have been a '4' or even a '3', and it wouldn't have mattered to me at all. because I knew him for three years as a friend before we had our first date. Intelligence, a sense of humor, stability, and compatibility of personality and interests have always been much more important to me than looks. (Also btw, my sister was only about a '6' in attractiveness and about 30 pounds overweight, and yet she married a solid '9' in looks, and he was crazy about her.)
Second, tattoos (and multiple piercings and other voluntary body "enhancements") is an entirely different issue than skin color is. People choose whether to get tattoos or not, but they have no choice about skin color -- unless they go to very drastic means to change it, such as the infamous tanning woman.
Aren't we all "racist" when we dig down deep ? I'm not saying overtly racist, but just something that comes out when we see something we don't like.
For example, there are some black people I do not care for, BUT, there are some white people I do not care for either. I tend to judge each person on their own merits. If a person, of any race, does dishonest or other bad acts, I have to say they are on my **** list.
Do you dislike people because they're black? There are plenty of black people I don't like, but it's not because of their race, it's their attitude and actions.
I dislike many people who are white just like I am, again, the reason I dislike them is not because they're white, it's because they're a jerk/liar/thief/etc.
No, I don't believe we're all racist. My dislike of people is not based on what color skin they have. A bad person is a bad person, and a good person is a good person.
Is a preference necessarily a prejudice like you wrote above?
Is preference necessarily a negative?
If you prefer people over others based on race, then that is a prejudice. A prejudice is just a preformed opinion. You're assigning points to people solely based on their race.
Now we can get all American school-optimistic about it and say all you're doing is assigning positive points to White people {positive prejudice}. Or we can go all Euro-style pessimist and say you're viewing Blacks negatively (negative points) compared to White people {negative prejudice}. It's really the same thing. Glass half full or half empty? Doesn't matter. It's prejudice. It's based on race. Therefore, it's racist.
uh oh....there goes all the white chicks that will only date black dudes
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