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Old 08-19-2019, 04:28 PM
 
49,082 posts, read 46,018,242 times
Reputation: 15595

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Quote:
Originally Posted by ClaraC View Post
We need to have this conversation, as a country.

This woman feared these young men. (Yes, they are legally children and deserve the legal protections and privileges that children enjoy, but visually, they are men, and as football players likely to appear to be very large, fit young men).

When she saw them approach, she feared them, and reacted out of that fear.
Being a Black male in my early 30s, that woman's fear does scare me. When I was a teenager, I did cut other person's lawns, and rake leaves to make some money for myself. It would scare me to know that I could run into someone who would pull a gun on me. Someone being that scared of me as a Black male puts fear into me. I don't want to get killed because someone else feared me. This is one reason I empathize with those boys. There is a chance it could have been me. I used to be a kid. I used to goof around, I sometimes went door to door to sell candy for my school. I know that if someone feared me that much, the chances of me getting shot increase. And this is the thing. I was never into hood rat behavior. I'm not some thug or criminal bent person.

In my case, I was a tiny person. I'm only 5'5" today. I've always been small and perceived to be younger than I really am. However, when I got into my 20s, looking younger than I am didn't do any good. When I was 25, I looked like I was 20. I could still find someone who looked at me with distrust due to being a young Black male. I'm 33 and a grocery store clerk (herself being 19 or 20) thought I was 25, 26 years old.

My perspective is this. You don't want to be feared, especially for the stupidity of other persons who happen to look like you. It opens you up to situations where you could be faced with someone who fears you and could go into "take action" mode as a result. What do you do to keep yourself from getting into those situations?
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Old 08-19-2019, 04:35 PM
 
49,082 posts, read 46,018,242 times
Reputation: 15595
Quote:
Originally Posted by Listener2307 View Post
Oh, yes.
I have had youngsters come to the door "looking for work".
In more remote areas, they will pull up in the driveway and honk the horn. If someone responds they drive away.
If these were children, there would have been an adult driving them around. When children come to the door selling this or that there is always an adult hovering nearby in a vehicle.

She over-reacted. But she looks like the type who would.
I've had people come to my door looking for work. I never felt the need to go to the door with a gun, Black person or White person. In my younger days (middle school and high school), sometimes I sold candy door to door(for school fund raisers of course) or went around the neighborhood looking to mow lawns or rake leaves. I was often unsupervised when I did this. It was common place for me to see unsupervised kids do this. Maybe it was just where I lived. I never had someone pull a gun on me. However, it no longer surprises me to know that this could happen.

That woman overreacting is scary. I chalk it up to her being a fearful and hateful woman.
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Old 08-19-2019, 04:43 PM
 
Location: Wouldn't you like to know?
375 posts, read 49,872 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by green_mariner View Post
I never had someone pull a gun on me.

Perhaps you need to for a reality check.


Its happened to me, its not exactly a pleasant experience.
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Old 08-19-2019, 04:52 PM
 
49,082 posts, read 46,018,242 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by tipsyguam View Post
Perhaps you need to for a reality check.


Its happened to me, its not exactly a pleasant experience.
What reality check? I'm talking to you about MY reality. In fact, go read the rest of my posts on this thread that I made today.
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Old 08-19-2019, 05:15 PM
 
49,082 posts, read 46,018,242 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by TinaTwo View Post
Yes I believe there is something to this. Not everything is about race but about experiences people have had. But yes some people do over react like Zimmerman and that lady pulling a gun on that couple in the trailer park campground.
Someone's overreaction could cost someone their life. That is never a good thing.
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Old 08-19-2019, 09:19 PM
 
Location: Howard County, Maryland
5,820 posts, read 3,756,602 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by green_mariner View Post
Well, I open my door when I see young Black men. I've never had anything happen to me from that instance. And I've been a Black male who had to do some work in certain neighborhoods. I empathize more with the young Black men who are decent than the persons who say "I wouldn't open my door for young Black men". I'm a Black male and I know what it's like when someone perceives you as a threat.

I want you to think about this. When I was in my adolescent years, I got bullied alot. The majority of those who bullied me and assaulted me were White males. Now, I don't avoid all White males. I take persons individual by individual. However, answer this. What would you think if I adopted the "I avoid hanging around White males" based on things that happened to me?
I got bullied when I was in middle school, and it was done by white males. But I never had a random white male meet me on the street or show up at my door and assault me without provocation. But it's happened to me with groups of young black males, more than once.

You certainly don't have to empathize with me, and if you don't feel inclined to open the door to me (a white male) because of your experiences, that's your choice. Nor do you have to assume any responsibility for what those other men did, since I'm going to assume that you were not in the groups who assaulted me. But my experiences with young black men in groups have not always been favorable, so I choose to exercise caution when I find myself facing them.
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Old 08-19-2019, 09:30 PM
 
49,082 posts, read 46,018,242 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by bus man View Post
I got bullied when I was in middle school, and it was done by white males. But I never had a random white male meet me on the street or show up at my door and assault me without provocation. But it's happened to me with groups of young black males, more than once.

You certainly don't have to empathize with me, and if you don't feel inclined to open the door to me (a white male) because of your experiences, that's your choice. Nor do you have to assume any responsibility for what those other men did, since I'm going to assume that you were not in the groups who assaulted me. But my experiences with young black men in groups have not always been favorable, so I choose to exercise caution when I find myself facing them.
Two White males throw rocks at me when I was 12 while I was hiking around. I also got shot with a paintball gun by a White male teenager while walking back to my house. I've also dealt with being a Black on Black crime victim when I got jumped on robbed one night. I don't hold the entire White male population responsible for the actions of those persons who assaulted me. I don't hold the entire Black male population responsible.

Now, no one has ever come up to my door and assaulted me. I've opened the door regardless if it was a Black male there or a White male there. Never had any issues. I don't use race as the determinant in opening the door or not.
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Old 08-19-2019, 10:17 PM
 
13,439 posts, read 4,089,726 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by green_mariner View Post
Two White males throw rocks at me when I was 12 while I was hiking around. I also got shot with a paintball gun by a White male teenager while walking back to my house. I've also dealt with being a Black on Black crime victim when I got jumped on robbed one night. I don't hold the entire White male population responsible for the actions of those persons who assaulted me. I don't hold the entire Black male population responsible.

Now, no one has ever come up to my door and assaulted me. I've opened the door regardless if it was a Black male there or a White male there. Never had any issues. I don't use race as the determinant in opening the door or not.
Nevertheless, not everyone's experience, viewpoint and knowledge is the same. If someone is going to be more cautious of males and even more if they're black males, it's not without a sound basis. You might not like it as a black male but that's just the way the cookie crumbles.
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Old 08-19-2019, 10:19 PM
 
7,745 posts, read 2,763,253 times
Reputation: 3055
Quote:
Originally Posted by mtl1 View Post
Nevertheless, not everyone's experience, viewpoint and knowledge is the same. If someone is going to be more cautious of males and even more if they're black males, it's not without a sound basis. You might not like it as a black male but that's just the way the cookie crumbles.
Why did she even open the door if she was so scared?
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Old 08-19-2019, 10:24 PM
 
13,439 posts, read 4,089,726 times
Reputation: 4004
Quote:
Originally Posted by vacoder View Post
Why did she even open the door if she was so scared?
How should I know? I've answered my door with concern and sometimes a gun within reach. I was just replying to a specific post.

Last edited by mtl1; 08-19-2019 at 10:38 PM..
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