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Old 06-16-2008, 09:49 PM
 
Location: Your mind
2,923 posts, read 4,572,993 times
Reputation: 590

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Why won't they talk about it? Because they don't want to acknowledge the obvious. They don't want you to know the truth about how earth's beloved moon creature compatriots, able to communicate for decades with a secret branch of the CIA through the use of the extrasensory communication techniques of a rare breed of orangutan found only in certain secluded patches of the Amazon rainforest and regarded by the tribal local inhabitants as sacred for the valuable milk that the females provide to the tribesmen in times of food scarcity, are suffering from a disease that once only infected the earth.

This disease, known as morbid obesity, has blossomed like a radiant flower on the moon recently as a result of a top-secret and highly illegal Burger King operation that began two decades ago, an operation of capitalism gone awry, an example of the terrors of what can happen when profiteers go wilder than the girls in those videos. Their plan? Simple. Provide jobs to the moon people at brand new "Moon Burger Kings," paying them 2 Burger Bucks an hour, each Burger Buck worth approximately 1/10th of a hamburger. The moon people are not given enough Burger Bucks to pay to satiate their alien addiction to the delicious Moon Burgers, so the company accepts "trades" instead... trading hamburgers, themselves made by the moon creatures, for precious Moon Golds and Moon Diamonds and Mind Fragments brought to them by the moon creatures and considered holy by their culture. In such a fashion BK reaps massive tremendous piles of pilfered pure pirate profit margins.

This influx of hamburgers into the moon creature society has created an obesity epidemic the likes of which have never been seen on earth -- the average arm diameter of a moon creature has shockingly gone from one inch in diameter to one and a half inches in diameter... no! TWO INCHES IN DIAMETER. They're looking fatter and fatter all the time. Plus these people are being raped of their Moon Golds, Moon Diamonds, and Mind Fragments at a record pace, destroying the foundations of their religion, their social structure,... many of the fragments of mind that have been given up in the name of further hamburger consumption have been those of prominent moon creature thinkers and politicians, thereby rendering such types only part-minded and therefore increasing the stupidity of the moon people. This must be stopped. Only you can stop it. Go to Burger King, ask for a whopper, then when they give it to you, say you want to open it up to inspect it. Act like you're inspecting it, then, when they're not expecting it, throw the whopper back in the window person's face. If all of America does this, we think that those sons of ******* will get the picture.

This Message Brought To You By The

Committee For Education About The Subject Of Vicious And Demeaning Moon Creature Exploitation And About The Subject Of Appropriate Popular Resistance to the Actions of the Moon Raping Corporations

Last edited by fishmonger; 06-16-2008 at 10:00 PM..
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Old 06-16-2008, 09:53 PM
 
Location: California
11,435 posts, read 17,144,928 times
Reputation: 12499
Dude, pass it this way, stop bogarting
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Old 06-16-2008, 09:57 PM
 
Location: um....guess
10,478 posts, read 13,860,961 times
Reputation: 1825
Quote:
Originally Posted by Roaddog View Post
Dude, pass it this way, stop bogarting
Dude, seriously, pass it on man!!!!
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Old 06-16-2008, 09:58 PM
 
Location: Here
10,864 posts, read 11,933,435 times
Reputation: 5985
Puff...Puff...Pass
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Old 06-16-2008, 10:08 PM
 
Location: Your mind
2,923 posts, read 4,572,993 times
Reputation: 590
If only the moon creatures had enough resources to where they could be lazy enough to sit around and pretend to smoke illegal drugs with you people, you know, if only. But you guys have probably never thought about that.
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Old 06-16-2008, 10:09 PM
 
Location: um....guess
10,478 posts, read 13,860,961 times
Reputation: 1825
Quote:
Originally Posted by fishmonger View Post
If only the moon creatures had enough resources to where they could be lazy enough to sit around and pretend to smoke illegal drugs with you people, you know, if only. But you guys have probably never thought about that.
No, I actually wish I had some on me right now, & that is no joke.
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Old 06-17-2008, 08:38 AM
 
Location: Retirementland
1,234 posts, read 2,468,102 times
Reputation: 829
Is it bad that I've had conversations like this... sober? lawl
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