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Yesterday I was in the room while my girlfriend was watching the Oprah interview of Sarah Palin. While my mind hasn't changed about the insufferable Palin or the annoying Oprah, something really stuck out in my mind.
Oprah said that 99.9% of women do all the "heavy lifting" when it comes to families. How is that not a sexist thing to say? I don't know about you all, but my father not only worked to earn the money for my family, but would fly back early from a business trip just to go to my little league game or to take me to the Warriors game. All of my friends had fathers who taught them how to play ball, how to be a man, how to deal with men (for those of my friends who are women), how to drive, how to fix things in the house, how to cook, how to do algebra, etc. To say that women do everything is not only incredibly sexist, it is false.
As a little league coach, I can say for certain that many of the fathers contribute more to their child's development than their mothers. Some of the kids have mothers that I've never met, and yet the father is at every practice and game.
Why is it still okay for a woman to say something like that, but if a man said "you're a woman, it's your job to clean, cook and take care of the kids" he'd be considered a sexist jerk?
Your issue is with Oprah.
And , yes, women can be very sexist...it's sexist to say they can't be.
Why couldn't they be???
Being at every fun event like a game doesn't do much to feed them, wash their clothes, clean their homes, take them to the doctor's, make sure they brush their teeth ,shop for their clothes, be sure their teacher has a gif/note/money, organize their car pool, etc, etc, etc,.......
so, sorry, if you think attending sporting events is all there is to being a parent...it's not.
9 months of being pregnant = plenty of heavy lifting
9 Months of waiting on someone hand-and-foot while doing heavy lifting = heavy lifting.
Tell my brother-in-law that he's doing nothing to help out when my sister goes into labor next week (she's due in 8 days), he'll have his hands full with their 2 year old girl and with making sure everything is taken care of so his wife can deliver with the least trouble.
To say that men do nothing while their wives/girlfriends are pregnant is pretty ridiculous indeed.
Just because nature dictates that you carry and deliver the baby doesn't mean you're the only one who is involved in creating that baby and in raising that baby into a healthy and successful adult. Sure, there are single mothers out there, but there are also single fathers out there too. In a typical situation, there are two parents and both play a significant role.
I'm not claiming that men are more important, but that it's wrong to say that women do all the work in raising a child.
Your issue is with Oprah.
And , yes, women can be very sexist...it's sexist to say they can't be.
Why couldn't they be???
Being at every fun event like a game doesn't do much to feed them, wash their clothes, clean their homes, take them to the doctor's, make sure they brush their teeth ,shop for their clothes, be sure their teacher has a gif/note/money, organize their car pool, etc, etc, etc,.......
so, sorry, if you think attending sporting events is all there is to being a parent...it's not.
Sorry if you're stuck in the 1950s and only the women are capable of taking kids to the doctor, cleaning clothes or home (my mother never cleaned, my father and the housekeeper did), feeding them, washing them (my father also gave my sister's their bottles and did all the diaper changing), shopping for them, etc.
It's very important to attend a child's special events, whether they are sporting events or recitals or debates. To a child, when one parent goes out of their way to come to the event, it shows how much the child means to the parent. When one parent continually favors personal activities over the child's events, it shows a lack of interest. It does matter.
I also said "teaching him how to be a man, teaching her how to deal with men, teaching him algebra, etc." my father taught me how to calculate complex math problems in my head from the time I was a little boy by quizzing me at the baseball games on the batting averages. My father taught me how to drive because my mother would freak me out with her jumpy nature. My father taught me how to shave. My father taught me how to read the stock pages. He taught me about business and gave me many life lessons.
And what about the "wait till your father gets home" people? Without the father, there is no discipline and therefore the kid has no structure...
If the man is doing nothing to raise the kids in your family, your husband/father is a deadbeat. Any real dad does a ton to help raise their child.
The bigger question is why a man a man would attempt to understand anything about women. Lost cause. Get a hobby. Drink beer. Keep them happy. Life is easier that way.
If the man is doing nothing to raise the kids in your family, your husband/father is a deadbeat. Any real dad does a ton to help raise their child.
I do agree with this but, subjective examples notwithstanding, I think that what Oprah meant was that daily responsibilities involving raising children for the most part fall on the female in the couple. Though personally I'd wonder about the 99 percent....and I also think that Oprah was speaking to Sarah Palin's extremely conservative family values.
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Some of the kids have mothers that I've never met, and yet the father is at every practice and game.
Why haven't you met the mothers of the children that you coach? Maybe because they're running three and four and five children around town to different practices, activities. Maybe because they're out getting groceries or doing errands after working a full day at work. Maybe because they're out taking care of grandma and grandpa, shopping for them, preparing their meals, cleaning their home, tending to their meds, making sure everything is taken care of while Jr. is at practice. Most women have to balance twenty things at once, while men, in general, do one thing at a time. That's my opinion.
it was pitched as a power share, but it never was it was a power grab. its not either or its both, authority and slack.
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