U.S. CitiesCity-Data Forum Index
Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Politics and Other Controversies
 [Register]
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
View detailed profile (Advanced) or search
site with Google Custom Search

Search Forums  (Advanced)
Reply Start New Thread
 
Old 04-16-2010, 10:09 AM
 
Location: Say-Town! Texas
968 posts, read 2,196,023 times
Reputation: 566

Advertisements

public school, its hard, we've all been there, either the bully or the bullied, we all have our chance to shine as the allstar or fail the test, get dumped by girl, and score a date to the prom.

so, if you child came home with a bloody nose from bullies at school, what would be your solution to this? teach him to fight?
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message

 
Old 04-16-2010, 10:31 AM
 
Location: Wisconsin
20,370 posts, read 13,893,246 times
Reputation: 5239
Quote:
Originally Posted by Orincarnia View Post
public school, its hard, we've all been there, either the bully or the bullied, we all have our chance to shine as the allstar or fail the test, get dumped by girl, and score a date to the prom.

so, if you child came home with a bloody nose from bullies at school, what would be your solution to this? teach him to fight?
Take a page from the liberal playbook and try to understand what your child has done to make the bullies feel the need to beat your child.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 04-16-2010, 10:43 AM
 
11,995 posts, read 17,512,523 times
Reputation: 6089
Quote:
Originally Posted by Orincarnia View Post
public school, its hard, we've all been there, either the bully or the bullied, we all have our chance to shine as the allstar or fail the test, get dumped by girl, and score a date to the prom.

so, if you child came home with a bloody nose from bullies at school, what would be your solution to this? teach him to fight?

That is my intention. Moth Jr is still quite young. But when he is old enough, he will be instructed in boxing and possibly martial arts. He will be instilled with a simple doctrine- Never start crap and do not take any. Should I see that he is the bully, he will have me to deal with. And that ain't gonna be fun.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 04-16-2010, 10:45 AM
 
Location: Sinking in the Great Salt Lake
13,143 posts, read 19,212,032 times
Reputation: 14007
Quote:
Originally Posted by Wapasha View Post
Take a page from the liberal playbook and try to understand what your child has done to make the bullies feel the need to beat your child.
Then give their parents money and hire a lawyer to protect the bully's rights?

My bully problems ended in 4th grade (back in the mid 80's) when I went apes#*t on our school bully one day in the plaground, just like Ralphie from "A Christmas Story" (it was my inspiration ). There was a trip to the principal and a note sent home to my parents, but that was the end of it, and the kid never bothered me again. I discovered personal confidence that day and it's served me well through my whole life.

That's how it's been for who knows how long.... but not anymore. Now they will suspend the kid fighting back, label him/her as a disturbed child, put them in juvenile court and load them up with a daily bucket of "calming" drugs. Ah, the liberal solution.

Last edited by Chango; 04-16-2010 at 10:57 AM..
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 04-16-2010, 10:56 AM
 
10,543 posts, read 12,019,659 times
Reputation: 2798
I would go to the school and explain exactly what happened and what you want to see happen. The school needs to keep an eye on the specific child and keep him away from the child he targets. The school needs to contact the bully's parents and let them know what happed and that it's not acceptable.

By the way, there is an approach to bullying that has been demonstrated through research to be effective. Check out Olweaus Bullying Program. It will not help this specific scenario, but I wish more schools were are of it.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 04-16-2010, 11:03 AM
 
Location: Jewel Lake (Sagle) Idaho
27,610 posts, read 17,675,866 times
Reputation: 15688
Back in the day, the bully would eventually pick on the wrong guy and end up being used to wipe the floor. Pretty much took the wind out of their sails. The "bully thumper" got a pat on the back from the teacher(s) and life went on. (I used to spend summers bailing hay, suprised a couple of our bullies in the fall).

These days schools encourage bullying behavior by punishing the "good guy".

Last edited by Toyman at Jewel Lake; 04-16-2010 at 11:20 AM..
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 04-16-2010, 11:36 AM
 
11,995 posts, read 17,512,523 times
Reputation: 6089
Quote:
Originally Posted by Rggr View Post
I would go to the school and explain exactly what happened and what you want to see happen. The school needs to keep an eye on the specific child and keep him away from the child he targets. The school needs to contact the bully's parents and let them know what happed and that it's not acceptable.

By the way, there is an approach to bullying that has been demonstrated through research to be effective. Check out Olweaus Bullying Program. It will not help this specific scenario, but I wish more schools were are of it.
That might work. The problem is then your kid is branded a tattle tale or someone too weak to fight his or her own battles and consequently loses face among peers.

Sad to say, the playground is a less-menacing variant of the penitentiary. The recipient of bullying most often needs to flatten the bully in front of everyone or at least fight back, even in a losing effort.

If parents' negligence has allowed their child to become a bully, word from the school may only go so far.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 04-16-2010, 11:42 AM
 
10,543 posts, read 12,019,659 times
Reputation: 2798
Quote:
Originally Posted by Moth View Post
That might work. The problem is then your kid is branded a tattle tale or someone too weak to fight his or her own battles and consequently loses face among peers.

Sad to say, the playground is a less-menacing variant of the penitentiary. The recipient of bullying most often needs to flatten the bully in front of everyone or at least fight back, even in a losing effort.

If parents' negligence has allowed their child to become a bully, word from the school may only go so far.
I'm a fan of flattening the bully. Not everyone is able to do that and bullies frequently have many victims until they find that one kid that flattens him.

The tattle tale thing is a problem. Teachers and other adults use that too. The problem is that if the child can't take care of the bullying problem themselves, then you just send them back to be bullied. The truth is that the bully has some people that will go along with him and some that will watch. Those people will use the tattle tale label. There is most likely a large group that's sick of the bully too. It can be helpful to work with kids that you know would not be a part of the bullying and have them reach out to the child being bullied to provide a safe haven and support.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 04-16-2010, 12:09 PM
 
470 posts, read 401,246 times
Reputation: 138
Quote:
Originally Posted by Chango View Post
Then give their parents money and hire a lawyer to protect the bully's rights?

My bully problems ended in 4th grade (back in the mid 80's) when I went apes#*t on our school bully one day in the plaground, just like Ralphie from "A Christmas Story" (it was my inspiration ). There was a trip to the principal and a note sent home to my parents, but that was the end of it, and the kid never bothered me again. I discovered personal confidence that day and it's served me well through my whole life.

That's how it's been for who knows how long.... but not anymore. Now they will suspend the kid fighting back, label him/her as a disturbed child, put them in juvenile court and load them up with a daily bucket of "calming" drugs. Ah, the liberal solution.
I agree totally. Every kid goes through this stuff and it is a part of growing up. You really do discover personal confidence in these situations. That confidence sticks with you and enables you to overcome life's obstacles when you are up against them. Good post Chango!
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 04-16-2010, 12:10 PM
 
470 posts, read 401,246 times
Reputation: 138
Quote:
Originally Posted by Toyman at Jewel Lake View Post
Back in the day, the bully would eventually pick on the wrong guy and end up being used to wipe the floor. Pretty much took the wind out of their sails. The "bully thumper" got a pat on the back from the teacher(s) and life went on. (I used to spend summers bailing hay, suprised a couple of our bullies in the fall).

These days schools encourage bullying behavior by punishing the "good guy".
Another good post!
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.

Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.


Reply
Please update this thread with any new information or opinions. This open thread is still read by thousands of people, so we encourage all additional points of view.

Quick Reply
Message:

Over $104,000 in prizes was already given out to active posters on our forum and additional giveaways are planned!

Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Politics and Other Controversies
Similar Threads
Follow City-Data.com founder on our Forum or

All times are GMT -6.

2005-2019, Advameg, Inc. · Please obey Forum Rules · Terms of Use and Privacy Policy · Bug Bounty

City-Data.com - Archive 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35 - Top