how come single moms are blamed for everything and not the fathers? (claim, rates)

[Loveshiscountry]

Originally Posted by SLCPUNK

It's all a spoke on the wheel of fear: Racism, misogyny, etc...these people hate everybody they can't relate to or are intimidated by. Which basically happens to be anybody who is not a white male.

LMAO, classic. You make a post about racism and in turn make a racist comment. Could you be anymore two faced?

[teepolo]

Male, Female!! Responsibility is the one action that seems to be missing when you read or hear about situations like this. I have met some very responsible single moms and i also have met some very responsible single dads (thought you'd never see that huh? single dads!); really, single dads, who have custody of thier children and take care of them with out mom because she wanted to be independent of the RESPONSIBILITY just like many absent fathers. You don't have to be RICH, EDUCATED or a certain race to be responsible. The OP said her mom taught her to do anyone she could. Her mom did not teach her to be responsible. My hope is the OP can see there is a better life outside the irresponsibilty she has been taught. If not for her sake then for the sake of her children. OP if you are reading this; your life and the life of your children will be blessed if you do the right thing. The right thing is not popular today but if you take hold of the right thing the responsible thing to do, God will take the years that have been stolen from you and the next portion of your life will be awesome with you, your children and possibly a man who is responsible.

[Cunucu Beach]

Originally Posted by teepolo

Male, Female!! Responsibility is the one action that seems to be missing when you read or hear about situations like this. I have met some very responsible single moms and i also have met some very responsible single dads (thought you'd never see that huh? single dads!); really, single dads, who have custody of thier children and take care of them with out mom because she wanted to be independent of the RESPONSIBILITY just like many absent fathers. You don't have to be RICH, EDUCATED or a certain race to be responsible. The OP said her mom taught her to do anyone she could. Her mom did not teach her to be responsible. My hope is the OP can see there is a better life outside the irresponsibilty she has been taught. If not for her sake then for the sake of her children. OP if you are reading this; your life and the life of your children will be blessed if you do the right thing. The right thing is not popular today but if you take hold of the right thing the responsible thing to do, God will take the years that have been stolen from you and the next portion of your life will be awesome with you, your children and possibly a man who is responsible.

Good post and right on the money. Take heed, OP. There is much good advice here.

[solytaire]

Originally Posted by harborlady

[Utter gibberish. You're hostile to women and could give a rats behind about fatherhood. It's about power trips. Don't have sex with anyone you wouldn't be willing to marry, and abortions would be a non issue in your personal life. This thread isn't about abortion.

Hostile towards women?...lol..ok havent heard that one before...anywho...I dont have sex with anyone I wouldnt marry. You think I would be some kind of irresponsible sex hound while preaching to others about personal responsibility?...lmao..come on now...I simply think thats the same standard to which we should hold women who choose to have abortions or dont hold anyone to it. Thats all.

Add more to that. She's also a gold digger if she gets married, and a prostitute if she decides marriage to an unsuitable partner is a bad idea.
That would be how I know these people are completely full of bull. It's not possible for a woman to be right about anything under any circumstance.

I realize that you were talking to wjtwet but, this is what I try to convey to people...you will notice that you NEVER, EVER hear me refer to women, or complain about women as golddiggers...why is this? - it is because I dont expect for women to seek losers. They are SUPPOSED to seek men who can provide for them, or at least help them provide for themselves...thats what they are supposed to do. Men who moan about women being gold diggers are generally men who have a shortage of money to offer themselves. Since women can make their own money, this is ok in this day in age. But again, I cant stand to hear men complain about women looking for men with money, when that is THEIR JOB. Men cant have it both ways...you either want women to exercise good judgment or not. And one part of exercising judgment when seeking a good prospective father would be to choose men who are affluent, or at least self sufficient.

You lost control of your body the moment you ejaculated without a condom. 'Your body' isn't involved from that point forward. Women who opt for abortion are expressing a profound lack of faith in their partner and in our civilization. I see no evidence in word or deed that would lead me to believe you'd be a good father.

'You' nothing...One could easily say that "YOU" lost control of your body the moment you spread your legs without a female condom...but since thats not what abortion rights are about, it is of no consequence. Likewise, a woman's body isnt involved in what a man does with his body from that point forward. So in similar fashion, he should be able choose whether he wants to use his body to support his child or not. But dont you worry your pretty little head: no one is worried about convincing you that I will be a good father. Both your words and deeds indicate that you would have no idea what constitutes a good parent anyway.

Childish vindictive attitudes makes you an afterthought. Good fathers and husbands are wanted and needed. What's passing for manhood these days isn't. You won't be coaxed, you'll simply be left behind. Single Mothers By Choice -- Pictures (http://singlemothersbychoice.com/pictures.html - broken link) FuturePundit: More Single Women Using Sperm Donors

Yeah, yeah... and men choose to use women as incubators. You need me to post a link to all of the statistics about deadbeat dads? Whats new?...Clearly these loser women/self elected single mothers, and deadbeat fathers/sperm donors are producing the most dysfunctional youth of the new age. Nothing to brag about there.

What YOU don't seem to realize is that
1. Human beings are not 'obtained'. A marriage contract is not ownership.

What YOU clearly cant comprehend is that people are obtained whether through contract or ownership. Ownership IS a contract (whether marriage or otherwise). You cant own something that does not belong to you. And the whole point of being in a monogamous relationship is for someone to be exclusively YOUR mate, or else no one can get upset about infidelity.

2. "Need a man"; Codependent agreements for the sake of stroking egos but leaving the other helpless is not healthy for anyone.

"Co dependent" and "stroking egos for the sake of leaving the other helpless" is a contradiction. Co dependent means that there is a symbiotic relationship anyway...so at minimum both egos would be stroked, and both people are being helped.

3. Held to a standard= "I want my mommy syndrome". Any partner requiring supervision (why does culture infantilize you? ) or adding to the burden of their partner needlessly (school marm, AKA battle-ax) lacks self discipline, is unqualified to be a partner, and a mentally unfit parent. Kids can't grow up unless their parents grow up.

LMAO!...how is holding a grown man to a standard wanting your mommy?...lol what kind of sense does that make? The 'holding people to standards', referred to WOMEN holding MEN to standards. Any partner who requires supervision and all of that other gibberish should not be a partner in the first place. Thats where women holding men who want to be with them to standards comes into play.

4. Women can and have done it alone for centuries. Who held down the fort during war times? How many widows and orphans? The smart ones will continue to do so unless a fit partner and parent presents himself.

Women doing it alone, and women doing a half assed job of doing it alone (APPEARING to do it alone) are two different things. The best a woman or man has done or will ever be able to do in raising children alone, is being a half assed version of what is supposed to be their counterpart. Crime statistics alone bear this out. Aside from that, what passes for "women doing it alone" is actually just women doing it without direct help from a romantic partner. Anyone can do that - thats no accomplishment. Loser men/single men do it everyday. But when you start looking at which women are LITERALLY doing it alone, hardly any are. Either child support payments, extensive family assistance or public assistance is necessary just for them to keep their heads above water. And truthfully, NO ONE can actually do it totally alone.

5. Juvenile pot shots at women because you fear a loss of power or esteem... don't act like a creep and you won't be treated as one. Any actual loss of power you're experiencing was never yours to begin with, and whatever esteem you came up short-- women aren't willing to artificially prop you up anymore. Put your pants on and grow up or get out.

Juvenile pot shots?..lmao...you have done nothing but issue infantile ad hominem retorts. You havent responded with an actual counter argument to anything Ive stated. Which is how I know I speak the truth. But since you insist on launching personal attacks, you know I have to respond in kind.

But you're contradicting yourself again: I cant fear losing something that I willingly concede, nor can I fear losing something that was never mine to begin with, as you stated. Men have already decided to willingly compromise their power. If they hadnt, they would have just physically suppressed women through control of firearms and military force. Women would have responded by distancing themselves from men, which would have caused a collapse in civilization. So while both men and women have distinct power, obviously, this wasnt the course that men chose, so your statement was an oxymoron at best, and purely moronic at minimum.

It is abundantly clear to me that men are still willing to artificially prop you up long enough to get sex from you...and then they drop you like a used condom. Obviously this has rendered you bitter and scorned, yet desperate to prove your worth as no only a woman, but as a human being. I wish you the best of luck in your quest, but dont take it out on me. I havent and cant harm you. Act like an ass, get treated like one, I always say. Here's your treatment. Put your dress on and think before you speak, or get back in the kitchen.

[dusk99]

Because women are the gatekeepers of sex, in the end they decide when and where it occurs. Men are hardwired to have sex as often as possible and with as many women they can. Its an evolutionary thing.

[harborlady]

Originally Posted by TKramar

Not all women want to be mothers. Not all men want to be fathers.

Let's try to remember that. I'm clear and upfront about it, personally.

Your option to get a vasectomy is YOUR responsibility to exercise. Failure to do so while engaging casual sex has consequences for others and for yourself. Being obliged to pay child support doesn't come close to footing the bill of real need children have for father figures in their lives.

Originally Posted by teepolo

Male, Female!! Responsibility is the one action that seems to be missing when you read or hear about situations like this. I have met some very responsible single moms and i also have met some very responsible single dads (thought you'd never see that huh? single dads!); really, single dads, who have custody of thier children and take care of them with out mom because she wanted to be independent of the RESPONSIBILITY just like many absent fathers. You don't have to be RICH, EDUCATED or a certain race to be responsible.

I've noticed that trend too- particularly among 20 something females deferring custody. So are we going to vilify them as horrible mothers when they acknowledge themselves as the less fit parent? That's another group of evil women-- those who put their children up for adoption are also horribly stigmatized. Damned if you do, damned if you don't.

I REPEAT, how is it possible to for any female to be correct according to these bizarre versions of morality going on in the minds of gossips?

[TKramar]

I only date women who would be willing to have an abortion.

[wjtwet]

Originally Posted by TKramar

I only date women who would be willing to have an abortion.

How does that work? do you ask a woman on a date then ask her then if she is willing to have an abortion?
or do you ask a woman are you willing to have an abortion then ask her on a date?

[parfleche]

as a single Dad I really dont care. I raised my daughters very well and went after their mom for support pay'ts which i finally got after threatening the county with legal action. never collected a dime of welfare or any other gov assistance and it really wasn't that hard. they are both college grads with jobs.many single women i know have also been very sucessful at raising children alone you have to want to

[harborlady]

Originally Posted by solytaire

Hostile towards women?...lol..ok havent heard that one before...anywho...I dont have sex with anyone I wouldnt marry. You think I would be some kind of irresponsible sex hound while preaching to others about personal responsibility?

How nice for you. I don't either. So perhaps you should direct your preaching to your own gender for a change. That was the point of this thread, not a platform to bash women.

Originally Posted by solytaire

you NEVER, EVER hear me refer to women, or complain about women as golddiggers...why is this? - it is because I dont expect for women to seek losers. They are SUPPOSED to seek men who can provide for them, or at least help them provide for themselves...thats what they are supposed to do. Men who moan about women being gold diggers are generally men who have a shortage of money to offer themselves. Since women can make their own money, this is ok in this day in age.

Your attitude towards marriage and genders is a cultural illness. Marriage is culturally sanctioned prostitution in that mindset. Economic realities being what they are since 60's on, very few can manage to not be 2 income family. Those are healthy marriages, not the statistical other side of failed marriages. Kettle black-- there ARE women who see men as a penis with a wallet and I don't care one whit for them no matter how respectable they try to make themselves out to be for the sake of appearances. That also requires two to tango, because males all too often offer their wallets in place of all else. All else is the substance of a marriage and fatherhood.

Originally Posted by solytaire

But again, I cant stand to hear men complain about women looking for men with money, when that is THEIR JOB. Men cant have it both ways...you either want women to exercise good judgment or not. And one part of exercising judgment when seeking a good prospective father would be to choose men who are affluent, or at least self sufficient.

That's a very interesting brand of social darwinism you're selling.

Originally Posted by solytaire

'You' nothing...One could easily say that "YOU" lost control of your body the moment you spread your legs without a female condom

Denying reality won't make it go away. Your body is no longer involved, a womans body inherently is involved. Keep it in your pants, get sterilized, get a condom (don't blame her birth control pills failing).

Originally Posted by solytaire

Clearly these loser women/self elected single mothers, and deadbeat fathers/sperm donors are producing the most dysfunctional youth of the new age. Nothing to brag about there.

Women who adopt children are 'losers'. You were saying about abortion?

Originally Posted by solytaire

What YOU clearly cant comprehend is that people are obtained whether through contract or ownership. Ownership IS a contract (whether marriage or otherwise). You cant own something that does not belong to you. And the whole point of being in a monogamous relationship is for someone to be exclusively YOUR mate, or else no one can get upset about infidelity.

Slavery has been abolished for quite some time now. Men are not a beast of burden, nor are women. Partnerships are a mutual agreement for common goal of mutual benefit. Monogamous commitment is a mutual agreement that defies logic when leapfrogging to wild conclusions of ownership. Your definition of marriage is social sickness.

Originally Posted by solytaire

"Co dependent" and "stroking egos for the sake of leaving the other helpless" is a contradiction. Co dependent means that there is a symbiotic relationship anyway...so at minimum both egos would be stroked, and both people are being helped.

Pay attention. IT'S NOT HEALTHY FOR EITHER OF THEM. It's an institutionalized sickness.

Originally Posted by solytaire

LMAO!...how is holding a grown man to a standard wanting your mommy?

Lack of self discipline on the part of males is what requires consequence in relation to males.

Originally Posted by solytaire

Women doing it alone, and women doing a half assed job of doing it alone (APPEARING to do it alone) are two different things.

On the one hand women do seek a community of like minded people to help (extended family, friends, church, day care centers etc). On the other hand more than half of the community has gone very far out of their way to see that they fail under the sick guise of 'family values'. It's abundantly clear to anyone reading your posts which side of that fence you fall.

Originally Posted by solytaire

Juvenile pot shots?..lmao...you have done nothing but issue infantile ad hominem retorts. You havent responded with an actual counter argument to anything Ive stated. Which is how I know I speak the truth. But since you insist on launching personal attacks, you know I have to respond in kind.

Really now? I bash males as an entire gender? Where did that happen?

I've responded to everything that had the merest semblance of merit. The rest I left to the circular file. If the majority of your arguments were ignored it's because your attitude was far too preposterous to lend credence. Personal attacks? Keep your mental illness to yourself and you won't find yourself offended when told to step off. I also exercise my 2nd amendment, so your reference below won't be taken lightly.

Originally Posted by solytaire

But you're contradicting yourself again: I cant fear losing something that I willingly concede, nor can I fear losing something that was never mine to begin with, as you stated. Men have already decided to willingly compromise their power. If they hadnt, they would have just physically suppressed women through control of firearms and military force. Women would have responded by distancing themselves from men, which would have caused a collapse in civilization. So while both men and women have distinct power, obviously, this wasnt the course that men chose, so your statement was an oxymoron at best, and purely moronic at minimum.

I haven't contradicted myself but you're proving my point of cultural trends with your own admission. Men have decided to willingly compromise their power the moment they engage casual sex pursuits. Crime statistics mean what in this context? Women are distancing themselves from men for the emotional absence in casual sex. Through increasing numbers, they're giving up on male counterparts, resigned to the notion 'that dog don't hunt'. That IS a horrible thing, but if you mean to address that trend, denying what it is they're responding to will not result in remedy.

Originally Posted by solytaire

It is abundantly clear to me that men are still willing to artificially prop you up long enough to get sex from you...and then they drop you like a used condom.

You believe what you need to believe, which is precisely why you're getting left behind. Net translation of your preaching: "All women are prostitutes, and nanny nanny boo boo Im'ma get even".

I'm so glad kids these days are smart enough to see through your BS. I hope they do a better job of it than your generation.