Are there a lot of "hotrovert" females in Portland? (weddings, salary)

[ca_north]

Originally Posted by Leisesturm

Life is tough. If you are a hot guy, act like it. The hot babes are going to come on to you and, yes, they will be higher maintenance than the plain jane frumps that don't need a heavy social life. Now what? Its your choice but it is a choice. I'd have killed to have been the guy the babes wanted to party with. To use very un-pc dog analogies for which I profusely apologize before the fact: You cannot expect a pit bull to act like a standard poodle. Both expect care and feeding so there is a baseline of obligation for either breed but thats about it. So, choose your poison and do the manly, quiet desperation thing and all will be cool. OTOH, there is one way I know of to have your cake and eat it too. It worked for me. You're not ready yet. Maybe in 10 or 15 years. Keep in touch.

H

Actually, I'm well past 30, Kemosabe!

[QuickStudy178]

Well, one of the problems you are having in finding what you want, namely a woman who is very attractive on the outside and very attractive on the inside (intelligent, bookish, gentle, genuine, loyal, trusting, considerate, sweet, etc.) is that given a choice, most men want that. Basically, what you are talking about is "marriage material". And in any city, including Portland, the competition for those kinds of women is extremely high. And furthermore, those types of women do not come back on "the market" very often, as most guys in their right mind are not looking for ways to cause such a woman to leave the relationship.

And despite what the frumpy dressers espouse about physical appearance not being important and wanting men to love them for who they are, the fact is men are innately visual. There's really not much men can do about that. To label such behavior "superficial" or "shallow" is to not understand how men are wired.

And despite the fact that it is 2011, most women place a high value on a guy's ability to provide a comfortable stable home and to be a protector for the family. So that means guys who are hunky and who have good solid incomes and who are self-reliant and "handy". Of course there are exceptions, but this seams to be what most women continue to value.

And that's why the likelihood of an average "normal" guy finding an available single woman who looks really nice (in my opinion: slender, silk blouse, fitted skirt, silk stockings, a hair ribbon, pearl necklace, make-up, coiffed hair, etc. - aka "preppy") and who is endowed with a charming and somewhat introverted personality, is challenging to find in Portland, or anywhere else..

[carolinajack]

Originally Posted by Daisy32673

Definitely. Goes both ways. But I typically see more women than men who don't really take care of themselves.
As far as OP is concerned, there are definitely more intellectual, "hippie-type" women running around here than there are obnoxious, pertentious, materialistic snobby women. You won't be disappointed

oh i see them still being pretentious, obnoxious, materialistic and snobby--hang outside of whole foods on ne 28th or outside of the coops. If they are hippies what happened to the happiness, smiles, free and easy lifestyle? they still have their noses in the air if you say hello or smile, they still have money to buy 400,000$ homes in the southeast and northeast--not simple living in my book but quite materialistic, and pretentiously smug.

just good looking thats all

[turquoise1]

Who on earth still wears silk stockings? That isn't preppy, that's Mad Men-era. I know Portland is retro, but it only seems to go back to the '60s.

[QuickStudy178]

Originally Posted by turquoise1

Who on earth still wears silk stockings? That isn't preppy, that's Mad Men-era. I know Portland is retro, but it only seems to go back to the '60s.

In Manhattan and Boston, there are still plenty of women who wear silks and garters, along with their tailored business suit.

[Leisesturm]

Yikes. Some Portland men need a reality check. You know... an earlier post had it right: in the main, the vast majority of couples you see, the man and woman are of very equivalent physical attractiveness. I will go as far as to say, the majority of couples I see, the man and woman could easily be brother and sister as far as appearances. Women who doll themselves up tend to look dismissively upon women who don't and fail to appreciate that even the no make-up women have work to do. Making your own Patchouli or lavender soap requires its own kind of effort.

For every girl (or guy) that you have to pine after, wishing that they were somehow more attainable, there is a girl or guy that you need exert no undue effort to attract. After awhile you see a pattern. Modern society has been corrupted by the fact that money often trumps good sense in the dating game. Guys with enough money, regardless of their other attributes or lack thereof can lay claim to almost any woman they want. So, maybe the question shouldn't be if Portland has lots of 'hotrovert' women, but, rather, does Portland have a lot of opportunities for a decent guy to make a pile (a big pile) o' moolah.

I didn't write this song, and if I did I would not have used the word "ugly" because I don't think there are any "ugly" people, but, the o.p. might take this song to heart:

If you wanna be happy
For the rest of your life,
Never make a pretty woman your wife,
So from my personal point of view,
Get an ugly girl to marry you.

Why and "average", "normal", guy would expect that a woman who wears silks should give him the time of day unless he works for Microsoft is beyond me. Sooner or later, she would come to her senses and leave him with a broken heart. The Universe is harsh and the penalty for those who mess with its laws is severe.

H

[EnricoV]

Originally Posted by QuickStudy178

And despite what the frumpy dressers espouse about physical appearance not being important and wanting men to love them for who they are, the fact is men are innately visual. There's really not much men can do about that. To label such behavior "superficial" or "shallow" is to not understand how men are wired.

And of course, it's up to the women to change their appearance to "snag" one of these great catches. You must be sure to wear uncomfortable, impractical, and unsafe clothing in order to cater to some man's "innate behavior."

[EnricoV]

Originally Posted by QuickStudy178

In Manhattan and Boston, there are still plenty of women who wear silks and garters, along with their tailored business suit.

What are these places? I know Portland would have been Boston had the coin flip gone differently, but I don't think either of these places, or their silk and garter clad women, are in Oregon. Thank the lord.

[Minervah]

And despite what the frumpy dressers espouse about physical appearance not being important and wanting men to love them for who they are, the fact is men are innately visual. There's really not much men can do about that. To label such behavior "superficial" or "shallow" is to not understand how men are wired.

"Frumpy" in your eyes not theirs. Not all men are wired to respond to your standard of fashion, otherwise the "frumpy" ladies would not have men at their side who do respond favorably to them. I live in the Hawthorne Blvd area so I see them all the time. They appear to be perfectly happy and content with one another. No need for these women to change for those
like you who may disapprove of them.

You seem to be requesting that women conform to your idea of what they should look like. Why not just focus on those you find who already do instead of trying to dictate to others how their appearance should be?

Also keep in mind that this is Portland and you are going to find more of the type of women you disapprove of so why not go elsewhere where you may have a greater choice to fill your qualifications of how women should dress.

[Leisesturm]

Originally Posted by ca_north

Actually, I'm well past 30, Kemosabe!

Doesn't matter, you're not ready. If you were, you'd be ready to make some concessions rather than asking if there are Unicorns in Portland. Oregon may be one of the few states where it is legal to date Unicorns but good luck finding one. They don't call them 'mythical creatures' for nothing. It requires major transdimensional mojo to charm one out of hiding. Sadly, I suspect, you have to play by the same rules the rest of us do or you wouldn't have had to start this thread. There may be unicorns, but there are no hotroverts. Carolina Jack is right. Pretty women are not nearly as pretty on the inside. Unless you manage a hedge fund. Then they are positively beautiful, inside and out. Look in the mirror and take an honest appraisal. Then go out and use that as a baseline. If you want better than you've got to give, you have to pay the piper. She may be a dead ringer for Julie Andrews (don't start) and have an art school figure model body, and an eidetic memory but she may have a visual impairment. The piper must be paid.

H