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Old 04-02-2014, 04:04 PM
 
Location: Portland, OR
8,802 posts, read 8,894,702 times
Reputation: 4512

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The Portland Bro

Uniform: Nike or Adidas workout clothes worn as regular street clothes. Well-formed calves from hiking, kayaking, and "fun runs" that involve costumes.
Job: Works for Nike or Adidas.
Drink of choice: Water
Hobbies: Adult soccer, basketball, softball, or running team.
Secret shame: Owns clothing made by rival sportswear brand. Owns those individual toe shoes, which we all can agree are gross.
Celeb brospiration: Lance Armstrong


http://jezebel.com/the-united-states-of-bros-a-map-and-field-guide-1550563737?fb_action_ids=10202522132589426&fb_acti on_types=og.likes
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Old 04-02-2014, 04:50 PM
 
4,059 posts, read 5,616,248 times
Reputation: 2892
Quote:
Originally Posted by VTHokieFan View Post
The Portland Bro

Uniform: Nike or Adidas workout clothes worn as regular street clothes. Well-formed calves from hiking, kayaking, and "fun runs" that involve costumes.
Job: Works for Nike or Adidas.
Drink of choice: Water
Hobbies: Adult soccer, basketball, softball, or running team.
Secret shame: Owns clothing made by rival sportswear brand. Owns those individual toe shoes, which we all can agree are gross.
Celeb brospiration: Lance Armstrong


The United States of Bros: A Map and Field Guide
Water over coffee or microbrew? I call shenanigans.

And since when does kayaking buff your calves? I must be doing it wrong.
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Old 04-02-2014, 05:15 PM
 
Location: Portland, OR
8,802 posts, read 8,894,702 times
Reputation: 4512
Quote:
Originally Posted by bler144 View Post
Water over coffee or microbrew? I call shenanigans.

And since when does kayaking buff your calves? I must be doing it wrong.
The "fun runs that involve costumes" thing is what made this one funny IMO.
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Old 04-02-2014, 05:18 PM
 
4,059 posts, read 5,616,248 times
Reputation: 2892
Quote:
Originally Posted by VTHokieFan View Post
The "fun runs that involve costumes" thing is what made this one funny IMO.
I laughed, but that seems to be a thing everywhere now. I have friends on the east coast who seem to be doing a different costume run every few weeks lately, despite the winter weather.
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Old 04-02-2014, 08:08 PM
 
Location: Portland, Oregon
46,001 posts, read 35,161,783 times
Reputation: 7875
You just described bros from Beaverton and surrounding areas that come into Portland only on Friday and Saturday night to hit up the clubs in Old Town in hopes of picking up a drunk girl that is easy.
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Old 04-03-2014, 10:40 AM
 
Location: Portland OR
378 posts, read 974,274 times
Reputation: 440
Quote:
Originally Posted by urbanlife78 View Post
You just described bros from Beaverton and surrounding areas that come into Portland only on Friday and Saturday night to hit up the clubs in Old Town in hopes of picking up a drunk girl that is easy.

They're our very own bridge and tunnel crowd.
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Old 04-03-2014, 10:45 AM
 
Location: Portland, Oregon
46,001 posts, read 35,161,783 times
Reputation: 7875
Quote:
Originally Posted by danwilsonbsee View Post
They're our very own bridge and tunnel crowd.
Haha, pretty much. I worked downtown for years close to the club area and always hated Friday and Saturday night when the bros from the suburbs would all funnel into downtown. Makes you wish they would just build a club scene area in Beaverton and be done with it.
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Old 04-03-2014, 10:50 AM
 
9,961 posts, read 17,512,704 times
Reputation: 9193
Quote:
Originally Posted by urbanlife78 View Post
Haha, pretty much. I worked downtown for years close to the club area and always hated Friday and Saturday night when the bros from the suburbs would all funnel into downtown. Makes you wish they would just build a club scene area in Beaverton and be done with it.
I've been to bars in Beaverton with people who grew up there--and it's like every night is Beaverton High reunion night. If they built clubs in Beaverton though, they'd just be full of bros from Hillsboro who refuse to go past Beaverton for any reason except for maybe Blazer games(and yeah, I've known people like that too).

And I'm not knocking the suburbs or anyone who lives out there, but more so just talking about people I went to college with...
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Old 04-03-2014, 10:50 AM
 
Location: the Beaver State
6,464 posts, read 13,434,579 times
Reputation: 3581
Quote:
Originally Posted by urbanlife78 View Post
You just described bros from Beaverton and surrounding areas that come into Portland only on Friday and Saturday night to hit up the clubs in Old Town in hopes of picking up a drunk girl that is easy.
Adidas employees don't live in Beaverton. That's too "Nike." They all live up in North Portland and sneer at the suburbs over hand made bloody mary's with small batch crafted and infused spirits.
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Old 04-03-2014, 11:20 AM
 
Location: Portland, Oregon
46,001 posts, read 35,161,783 times
Reputation: 7875
Quote:
Originally Posted by Deezus View Post
I've been to bars in Beaverton with people who grew up there--and it's like every night is Beaverton High reunion night. If they built clubs in Beaverton though, they'd just be full of bros from Hillsboro who refuse to go past Beaverton for any reason except for maybe Blazer games(and yeah, I've known people like that too).

And I'm not knocking the suburbs or anyone who lives out there, but more so just talking about people I went to college with...
That is too funny, and I am pretty sure very true. I do get a kick out of people who say they live in a city, but when you get the details what they mean to say is they live out in the suburbs and never go into the city except for rare occasions.
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