CA transplant wondering wtf I'm doing here

[oregonwoodsmoke]

Originally Posted by blehcity

I forgot to mention that I'm considering going back to grad school. If I went back to CA to mooch off my family, it'd be for that reason.

And honestly, mooching off my parents doesn't seem like such a filthy thing as long as I don't do it for long. I wouldn't live at home for more than a few months no matter what. I do have friends and plenty of potential roommates down south.

OK. I consider going back to school a valid excuse.

[Yankeemama]

Originally Posted by blehcity

You're right that grad school would make me boxed in. Before I would commit to going back to school, I'd take more work in my major's field....which is another reason to go back home, because breaking into that field usually requires plenty of unpaid work/internships.

I liked my major, but I didn't think it was my "passion." At this point, I'm starting to think finding work you can just mostly like rather than be passionate about is still a pretty good deal. There's no guarantee my passion is work at all. Maybe it's just saving up money so I can travel and eat good food.

Go home and make plans there with support. You may be only 23 but yeah... I was 23 like yesterday. Now I am in my late 40's. Time flies. The world is different for younger people than when I was "exploring" the world and finding myself. I left SF to go to NYC in the 90's but I have family all on the East coast so I adjusted well. Needing help from family is a good thing. It means you come from a good family and that you know how to ask for help. Good luck to you.

[eric351982]

Oh I hear you and I can relate. I grew up in Eugene, Oregon (100 miles down the road) and then moved to Portland. My friends from Eugene also moved here. I loved it.

In my mid-twenties I moved to Tucson, Arizona for my graduate school and was excited at first. Having grown up here, I wanted to get the heck out of Portland and the rain. I thought it was boring and I wanted new horizons.

I left my family and friends to a whole new city and it was much more difficult than I thought it would be. It was like I lost my whole community and everyone I took for granted when I lived here. I missed all the events in Oregon: birthday parties, anniversaries, holidays, movie nights, births, deaths.

I flew back twice a year and had rushed trips where I could barely fit in seeing everyone and leaving some people left out. It was terrible. Each time it came time to leave I did not want to get on the plane.

It's really hard to make new close friends in your 20's. Sure, I met people in Tucson but they were all married and had their own best friends from childhood. Oh, and extended family.

I moved back to Portland not for Portland as much as for family and friends. Immediately when the moving truck pulled up to my house I had 20 people standing there to greet me. I now go to all birthday parties, holidays, and heck, just movie nights with my old friends that I've had since middle school! They are still my closest friends.

In my twenties I thought the city I lived in defined me but now I’ve realized that the relationships and people we have around us are much more important.

If my family and friends ALL lived in Dallas, Texas I’d live there. No city is cool enough to walk away from all of that.

If I were you I'd reserve the moving truck and go back to your home.