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Old 09-28-2017, 02:24 AM
 
983 posts, read 458,411 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by marketa View Post
The very next day I took Plan B and started birth control and since then we kept having unprotected sex.
How stupid can you be????
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Old 09-28-2017, 06:47 AM
 
Location: Middle America
35,817 posts, read 39,361,269 times
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NOBODY portrays abortion as "glamorous and trendy."
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Old 09-28-2017, 12:44 PM
 
229 posts, read 325,137 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by TXNGL View Post
To Marketa, only you can make this choice. Sending positive thoughts your way. To newtovenice, the media portrays abortion as glamorous and trendy? Where is this happening? I want to lay off because a real person, Marketa, is dealing with a crisis pregnancy, but it's difficult for me to let that statement stay without saying...what???
To all those who think having abortions is glamorous and easy, raise your hand if you'd like to be in my shoes! Scary as F, right? Nobody in their right mind would want this. So let's have a little human compassion towards women who want a children very much but due to extenuating circumstances, mental illness, lack of support, health issues or whatever other reason choose the heartbreaking path of abortion because they don't see the light at the end of the tunnel.
I will equal abortion a little bit to the decision of ending life support for a dear one who has no prospects of ever coming back to real life. Pulling the cord is the most heartbreaking thing, but it is also the most compassionate action.
I hope none of you ever have to be in a situation like that.
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Old 09-28-2017, 01:10 PM
 
Location: State of Transition
72,676 posts, read 64,140,481 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by marketa View Post
. The very next day I took Plan B and started birth control and since then we kept having unprotected sex.
Yes, OP. Oral contraceptives need to be taken a full month prior to having otherwise unprotected sex. The bc doesn't become effective instantly. Who knows, the Plan B may have worked, but your subsequent decision may have been what resulted in the pregnancy.

You really should have seen a doctor about it, to get properly informed about how oral contraceptives work, and to get a pregnancy test.
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Old 09-28-2017, 01:47 PM
 
Location: Denver CO
18,977 posts, read 10,040,378 times
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We're only getting a small glimpse of what you are thinking and feeling but I have to say that what you've posted certainly gives the impression that you want to keep the baby and raise it, even if that means as a single mom.

I've been a single mom since my son was born and while it's not always easy, it's certainly doable. Being a travel nurse is going to have to change, but working as a nurse is a good stable career - hours are not always great, but with some effort, you can find childcare that will work with your schedule. Some hospitals even provide onsite childcare that is available 24 hours a day, so that you can cover whatever shift you have.

Having family nearby helps, but you can create your own "village" that will help you raise your kid by providing some back up and support when you need it. One of my favorite stories is one day I was having a very rough time, not enough sleep, baby was fussy, I wasn't in great shape. I talked to a close friend who unfortunately had a commitment she couldn't get out of but she called another friend and sent her to my house with a bag of groceries and some empty arms to hold my baby while I got some much needed rest. I've tried to pay it forward by helping other moms (married and single) when I was in a position to do so.

As I said, it's not always easy, but you can make it work if it's what you want.

And you never know with the guy, it's not unreasonable for him to be in shock for now and think that termination is the easy way to go. That doesn't mean he can't come around and step up if you decide you are going to continue the pregnancy and keep the child. Maybe yes, maybe no, but keep an open mind and see what happens.
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Old 09-28-2017, 05:19 PM
 
4,783 posts, read 1,544,109 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by marketa View Post
To all those who think having abortions is glamorous and easy, raise your hand if you'd like to be in my shoes! Scary as F, right? Nobody in their right mind would want this. So let's have a little human compassion towards women who want a children very much but due to extenuating circumstances, mental illness, lack of support, health issues or whatever other reason choose the heartbreaking path of abortion because they don't see the light at the end of the tunnel.
I will equal abortion a little bit to the decision of ending life support for a dear one who has no prospects of ever coming back to real life. Pulling the cord is the most heartbreaking thing, but it is also the most compassionate action.
I hope none of you ever have to be in a situation like that.
No were do I say that I think it is trendy and glamorous. They media portrays it as such, an easy trip to the doctor, back at the nightclub the next day. I could post "commercials" that would make your head spin at the absolute lack of understanding of abortion. But I won't, not hi-jacking the thread.

To the OP: You sound like a very level headed woman. I wish you the best.

(but don't assume you know what others have been through because you don't. advice comes from those who have been there, and those who have watched and those who have no personal experience with it.)
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Old 09-28-2017, 08:08 PM
 
4,428 posts, read 301,376 times
Reputation: 1518
Quote:
Originally Posted by newtovenice View Post
There's your answer. You wold regret having an abortion for the very same reason, you would be giving up your baby. The difference is only 8 months time.

The media portrays abortion as glamorous and trendy. It's not. It's a lifetime of regret, all around. That memory will always BE there.

The fact that you are already thinking about finances, mothering and help shows you CAN do this. Your mind is already trying to figure out your life with a baby in it.

No one can tell someone else what they would regret. Who are you to say she would regret it? Not everyone regrets an abortion.

I cannot think of a time where I've read or heard of the media portraying abortion as glamorous and trendy. What are you talking about? Your statement strikes me as odd and ridiculous. I'm thinking you are misunderstanding something you saw or read.

Finally, to tell another person that it's a lifetime of regret and that memory will always be there is not for you to say or for you to know about someone else. Just another false statement.
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Old 09-29-2017, 12:31 AM
 
5,165 posts, read 2,391,633 times
Reputation: 8193
GET CHILD SUPPORT! He probably will resist paying, but get a court order & do what you need to do to collect it. Your salary alone isn't enough to support a child, plus you'll be off work to recover from the birth, 6 weeks at least postpartum.

You're 32, a mature woman. Do what is right for YOU, & be glad you're living in a country where pro-choice is still the law. Good luck to you.
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Old 09-29-2017, 12:47 AM
 
Location: Dallas, Texas
8,856 posts, read 10,315,940 times
Reputation: 9267
Quote:
Originally Posted by newtovenice View Post
No were do I say that I think it is trendy and glamorous. They media portrays it as such, an easy trip to the doctor, back at the nightclub the next day. I could post "commercials" that would make your head spin at the absolute lack of understanding of abortion. But I won't, not hi-jacking the thread.

To the OP: You sound like a very level headed woman. I wish you the best.

(but don't assume you know what others have been through because you don't. advice comes from those who have been there, and those who have watched and those who have no personal experience with it.)
The poster, Merkata, the person you are responding to, IS the OP. Newtovenice, where are you seeing these "commercials"? Easy trip to the doctor, back to the nightclub the next day? Because that's truly disturbing.
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Old 09-29-2017, 07:09 AM
 
4,783 posts, read 1,544,109 times
Reputation: 7847
Quote:
Originally Posted by TXNGL View Post
The poster, Merkata, the person you are responding to, IS the OP. Newtovenice, where are you seeing these "commercials"? Easy trip to the doctor, back to the nightclub the next day? Because that's truly disturbing.
I couldn't find this one by itself, it's been removed from YouTube, but it's called .... Commedians in Cars Getting Abortions by NARAL Pro Choice America. This is a video commentary, not the original, which has been pulled. I would rather have posted the original, but I can't.


https://www.youtube.com/watch?time_c...&v=h7iS3bd-xZY

I couldn't find the nightclub one. I'd bet that was pulled too.

"The truth is, and I don’t like to admit this,” Sarah Silverman continued, “I’ve never had an abortion."
"I still haven't had an abortion, but I wish I had, " Lena Dunham.

I know women who have had abortions, and they do regret it. Decades later, they STILL think about it. And I know single moms who say keeping the baby was the best thing that they ever did, and they couldn't imagine their lives without their child. (PS. I am NOT religious, don't belong to a church.)

This will be the LAST post from me on this, I'm only posting because people were asking.

This thread is the OP's thread. Let's leave it that way, please.

Last edited by newtovenice; 09-29-2017 at 07:18 AM..
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