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Old 02-15-2010, 11:05 PM
 
Location: Denver 'burbs
21,172 posts, read 22,265,216 times
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Sorry. Not sure where that comes from....just because you have "your heart set" on something, doesn't mean it's ok to get it or do it if you cannot afford it. That attitude explains A LOT of problems recently. You do what you can afford.
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Old 02-16-2010, 12:55 AM
 
3,647 posts, read 4,653,565 times
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Check your city/county recreation department if you want to have it outside the home. They usuallly have some very reasonable rooms and facilities.

Is there a particular reason it wouldn't be feasible to have the shower at home? (Family schedules, no time to clean up, etc?). If your space is small and you don't think you have enough room, think again! Some of the best parties I've ever been to were in small spaces. DM me if you want some ideas.

The front of my house is long and narrow, with the living room, a music area and the dining room flowing together. I gave a shower and had 33 people. We had a blast! The food was on a table in the dining room and everyone served themselves. Some sat and some mingled. I used lunch plates from three different sets of china that coordinated but didn't match.

Get your best stuff out and enjoy it. Look at all of the china, crystal, serving dishes, etc. that you never use and really celebrate the occasion.
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Old 02-16-2010, 09:02 AM
 
Location: Austin TX
4,794 posts, read 3,034,948 times
Reputation: 6992
Quote:
Originally Posted by antiquesmountainapache View Post
Check your city/county recreation department if you want to have it outside the home. They usuallly have some very reasonable rooms and facilities.

Is there a particular reason it wouldn't be feasible to have the shower at home? (Family schedules, no time to clean up, etc?). If your space is small and you don't think you have enough room, think again! Some of the best parties I've ever been to were in small spaces. DM me if you want some ideas.

The front of my house is long and narrow, with the living room, a music area and the dining room flowing together. I gave a shower and had 33 people. We had a blast! The food was on a table in the dining room and everyone served themselves. Some sat and some mingled. I used lunch plates from three different sets of china that coordinated but didn't match.

Get your best stuff out and enjoy it. Look at all of the china, crystal, serving dishes, etc. that you never use and really celebrate the occasion.
I agree with this poster the most. I've hosted a large handful of baby showers over the years - my first one was back when I was 20 or so and BROKE, and still lived in a one-bedroom apartment. We borrowed a few extra chairs from a neighbor, spread them around the tiny livingroom, and had a potluck. We put all the dishes out on my tiny four-person dinette table that we shoved against a wall to make more room. I bought cute paper products at the grocery store along with a 1/4 sheet cake from the store's bakery. For the game prizes I went to a drugstore and bought little bath sets for about $5 each. We had about 20 women, and being scrunched up in one room together was actually a LOT of fun! Everyone had a good time and it was very cost-effective.

A few years later after I had bought my first home I hosted a really large bridal shower at my house (about 40 people) and simply rented three 8-person tables with umbrellas and chairs, set them out on the back lawn along with some lawn chairs, and people milled pretty comfortably in and out of the house all day long. The table rental was cheap and setting them up out back gave us so much more room to work with. Those who wanted to stay indoors sat in the livingroom with the sliding glass door open where they could see and hear everything going on outside.

My party was in the spring however, so it was warm enough to allow an indoor/outdoor event. But if I had to, I could have figured out a way to fit everyone indoors!

Don't succumb to the pressure to make it bigger, better, more extravagant. Women will have a great time just being together, chatting, and playing silly games. They'll remember the company, not the food or decorations!
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Old 02-16-2010, 09:10 AM
 
43,012 posts, read 89,532,789 times
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You can have a baby shower anywhere. I've attended baby showers that were indoor/outdoor types.

I was at one that was mostly in the back yard----no fancy tents or seating either.

People make these things too complicated when the try to keep up with the Jones. Baby showers are supposed to be a party with friends and family.

Not sure how baby showers got out of control. I hear there are crazy baby showers in the Northeast that are very extravegant.

People shouldn't feel the need to impress friends and family.
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Old 02-16-2010, 10:16 AM
 
Location: Penobscot Bay, the best place in Maine!
1,891 posts, read 5,167,988 times
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What's up with this rumor of lavish celebrations being the norm the Northeast? I'm almost as Northeast as one can go, and we are still pretty conservative on the parties/showers/receptions. Maybe in/around the larger cities they tend to go overboard (and I'm sure there are some in the other regions that do as well!), but out here in the sticks, we are still pretty practical.
I have never been to a bridal or baby shower that was not either held at someone's home or in the church of the person being "showered"- no catering or tent rentals or terribly fancy party favors. Just a bunch of girls (young and old) getting together to celebrate a milestone in the life of someone they love.
The gifts, as well, are not extravagant. The grandparents might show up with a gift of a new stroller or crib (ie- the BIG gift), but I don't think most other gifts would be in excess of $40- blankets, clothes, baby book, etc. Couple of silly party games, and then a table of homemade munchies (and most invitees in my area WILL call and ask if they can bring something for the food table) like veggies, chips, dip, brownies, cookies, and punch. Maybe some little 1/4 sandwiches, but not usually a full lunch. Usually showers in my area are held mid-morning or mid-afternoon, and a snack (as opposed to a meal) is sufficient.
Depending on how many people you have attending, snacks shouldn't run you more than $50. For decorations, paper plates and any favors, I would suggest going to a dollar store, as you could really get most of what you need also for less than $50.

I don't agree with asking invitees to pay for their own lunch, much like not expecting wedding guests to pony up for their dinners (DESPITE what some money-grubbing brides like to think, that is NOT the rule of thumb!). Scale back your plans to what you (the host) can afford or make arrangements to hand over your host hat to someone who can afford it (but I prefer the scaling back over the handing over!).
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Old 02-16-2010, 02:56 PM
 
Location: NJ/NY
10,634 posts, read 16,282,167 times
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That's incredibly rude and tacky. I have never been to any type of shower where the host expected the guests to pay. That's crazy. A potluck at someones house is fine, but don't ask your guests to pay for their meals.
Quote:
Originally Posted by NoExcuses View Post
What's wrong with hosting the shower at a local restaurant for brunch or lunch, guests order what they want and pay for their own food, and the hosts pay for the guest of honor?

There are no rules that a host of the shower pay for all guests at a restaurant.

= A great time had by all.

My sister just attended a baby shower for one of her nieces at a restaurant. Each guest ordered off the menu for lunch and paid for their own plates. Of course the guest of honor was taken care of by the hosts; two of her aunts.

Last edited by newtoli; 02-16-2010 at 03:05 PM..
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Old 02-16-2010, 04:00 PM
 
15,234 posts, read 16,188,046 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by newtoli View Post
That's incredibly rude and tacky. I have never been to any type of shower where the host expected the guests to pay. That's crazy. A potluck at someones house is fine, but don't ask your guests to pay for their meals.
I just want to add that I think this type of shower is okay among co-workers. We've done it where I work. Someone organizes it by sending around a flyer saying "we're going to celebrate whatever by going to XYZ restaurant and it's $12.00 per person." No one seems offended.

I agree that it's different if you're actually inviting people to an event that you claim to be hosting.
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Old 02-16-2010, 04:16 PM
 
3,422 posts, read 9,481,007 times
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I'd feel really uncomfortable if I got an invitation like you presented in the OP. Gifts can get pricey enough. I like the idea of someone's house - how small is the house and how many people are you inviting? I have been to several baby showers in 1200 sq ft starter homes (because, think of it, a lot of people who know others who are newlyweds and having babies live in starter homes) and there was plenty of room.
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Old 02-16-2010, 04:25 PM
 
11,622 posts, read 19,837,123 times
Reputation: 12085
Quote:
Originally Posted by Marlow View Post
I just want to add that I think this type of shower is okay among co-workers. We've done it where I work. Someone organizes it by sending around a flyer saying "we're going to celebrate whatever by going to XYZ restaurant and it's $12.00 per person." No one seems offended.

I agree that it's different if you're actually inviting people to an event that you claim to be hosting.
Work is different. I think its fine for work.
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Old 02-16-2010, 04:32 PM
 
Location: NJ/NY
10,634 posts, read 16,282,167 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Marlow View Post
I just want to add that I think this type of shower is okay among co-workers. We've done it where I work. Someone organizes it by sending around a flyer saying "we're going to celebrate whatever by going to XYZ restaurant and it's $12.00 per person." No one seems offended.
I agree that it's different if you're actually inviting people to an event that you claim to be hosting.
I agree with that, throwing something at work is a totally different situation.
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