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Old 01-26-2011, 02:34 PM
 
2,179 posts, read 4,196,111 times
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I am so unhappy with my life and living off savings on top of it. I have nothing that makes me happy when I wake up in the morning, and nothing to look forward to when I go to sleep. I am just glad I don't have kids or a spouse who would have to see me like this.

I moved to a new city for a job that ended up being a position I should have not even been offered due to my experience not being right for the position. I ended up getting new jobs, but they are very on call. I volunteer 2x a week doing something I like, but it's not enough.

I have no friends here, or family. I go to Meetup events and talk to people, but never get friends from this. I go to synagogue events and they are just things that allow me to kill the time.

I regularly apply for full time jobs that I am qualified for. I also work out regularly and completely changed my diet and eat right.

I am just so miserable right now. I am on medication, seeing a therapist, call up my parents and old friends, and try to realize things are "learning experiences", and try to listen to all those other cliches, but I still feel this way.
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Old 01-26-2011, 02:44 PM
 
4,868 posts, read 7,126,277 times
Reputation: 3134
You know, I think it all boils down to being happy with yourself first.

I have a lot of things at the moment to be really sad over, but life is too short I think to really waste it being sad.

What else do you like to do that you can be involved in? If I were in your position I'd walk on the beach every day, take as many dance classes as I could, learn to crochet..anything.

Even living in my hometown again, a lot of people here move away so now I have very few friends left to do things with, on top of the fact that I had a couple of falling outs so I'm learning that friendships are nice, but they're really fickle. The only people I can count on is family.
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Old 01-26-2011, 02:52 PM
 
Location: NW Indiana
39,356 posts, read 14,429,150 times
Reputation: 99438
Quote:
Originally Posted by Naomi Manischewitz View Post
I am so unhappy with my life and living off savings on top of it. I have nothing that makes me happy when I wake up in the morning, and nothing to look forward to when I go to sleep. I am just glad I don't have kids or a spouse who would have to see me like this.

I moved to a new city for a job that ended up being a position I should have not even been offered due to my experience not being right for the position. I ended up getting new jobs, but they are very on call. I volunteer 2x a week doing something I like, but it's not enough.

I have no friends here, or family. I go to Meetup events and talk to people, but never get friends from this. I go to synagogue events and they are just things that allow me to kill the time.

I regularly apply for full time jobs that I am qualified for. I also work out regularly and completely changed my diet and eat right.

I am just so miserable right now. I am on medication, seeing a therapist, call up my parents and old friends, and try to realize things are "learning experiences", and try to listen to all those other cliches, but I still feel this way.
Naomi, have you thought about trying a different therapist? Not every therapist is a great fit for every person. Perhaps a new set of ears would benefit you. It sounds as though you are being proactive, trying to make your life better. The only explanation I can think of is that your therapy is not working as it should, and perhaps it's time to try a different therapist and/or different meds.

God bless you.
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Old 01-26-2011, 02:57 PM
 
Location: Massatucky
1,157 posts, read 1,917,647 times
Reputation: 1744
Nai I have been through times when I could not find a friend, when days seemed troubled from dawn to dusk and life was just not so great. It sounds like you are making some good strides in getting out and doing things but you have to stop thinking you are just 'killing time' but instead try to get something out of it. Sounds like you are in the Grad School of Hard Knocks but you have no choice but to dust yourself off and find yourself some joy in simple things like a walk in the woods, a hot bowl of soup or an old sit com - just getting yourself to appreciate even the smallest things is a start.
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Old 01-26-2011, 02:58 PM
 
Location: Houston, TX
17,032 posts, read 26,015,549 times
Reputation: 16166
Thats all part of the moving experience. I have felt the same in the past. What things can you do that make you happy? Exercise, pets, dancing, watching TV, posting on C-D? Volunteer work is a good option, you really do help yourself when you help others.

When your not happy with yourself, the only people you will attract are other gloom and doomers. Maybe you should wear all black clothing and smoke clove cigarettes.
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Old 01-26-2011, 02:59 PM
 
Location: colorado
2,788 posts, read 4,236,551 times
Reputation: 3312
Quote:
Originally Posted by Naomi Manischewitz View Post
I am so unhappy with my life and living off savings on top of it. I have nothing that makes me happy when I wake up in the morning, and nothing to look forward to when I go to sleep. I am just glad I don't have kids or a spouse who would have to see me like this.

I moved to a new city for a job that ended up being a position I should have not even been offered due to my experience not being right for the position. I ended up getting new jobs, but they are very on call. I volunteer 2x a week doing something I like, but it's not enough.

I have no friends here, or family. I go to Meetup events and talk to people, but never get friends from this. I go to synagogue events and they are just things that allow me to kill the time.

I regularly apply for full time jobs that I am qualified for. I also work out regularly and completely changed my diet and eat right.

I am just so miserable right now. I am on medication, seeing a therapist, call up my parents and old friends, and try to realize things are "learning experiences", and try to listen to all those other cliches, but I still feel this way.

Just consider them stepping stones to to the right path...
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Old 01-26-2011, 03:01 PM
 
3,788 posts, read 6,670,288 times
Reputation: 2650
Change happens. A lot of times we get comfortable in our surroundings that when we go into something new, its not as great as it looked like. It sounds like you really liked the place you came from and the current place is nothing like it. You can change this by doing 1 of 2 things. Move back to the old place or try to find things and people to like in your new place.

The thing is you can sit there and what if the heck out of every situation that you're in. The problem is that hindsight is always 20/20. There were some choices I didn't make that would have helped me more, but then I think would I be here and in my current situation if I didn't? You take the good with the bad. You have the cards you were dealt with, now you just have to play them right.

You should try to do what you like to do and try to make some friends. Other than a synagogue, are there any other types of clubs or the like that you can join and meet people? I would suggest getting out and doing the things you used to do - minus the meeting people. The reason I say this is that when you start doing the activities you like to do, meeting people through them will become easier.

Like mir said, you need to be happy with yourself first. You need to start liking yourself.
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Old 01-26-2011, 03:02 PM
 
3,788 posts, read 6,670,288 times
Reputation: 2650
Quote:
Originally Posted by mir86 View Post
learn to crochet..anything.
Could you crochet me a suit? I'll need one if I ever go on an interview.
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Old 01-26-2011, 03:03 PM
 
4,868 posts, read 7,126,277 times
Reputation: 3134
Quote:
Originally Posted by thebobs View Post
Could you crochet me a suit? I'll need one if I ever go on an interview.
I would love to! I have to learn first though!
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Old 01-26-2011, 03:04 PM
 
3,788 posts, read 6,670,288 times
Reputation: 2650
Quote:
Originally Posted by cwaggy View Post
an old sit com - just getting yourself to appreciate even the smallest things is a start.
Moe Larry and Curly always brought me out of a slump.
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