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Old 01-27-2011, 08:39 PM
 
829 posts, read 2,509,124 times
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My wife is going through some mental issues...She has depression, mood swings, etc...She is seeing a counselor, and they are seeing what they can do...

I hope im not being selfish, but I am at my wits ends...She is nasty to me, saying some hurtful things, etc..

I know im not perfect, and ive said some things, but im just stressed.

I feel like im just going down hill...

last night was great...but today we had a little tiff, and now all of a sudden her new meds are causing hallucinations, slurring in the speech...

im not saying shes making it up, but yesterday she didnt have it, but the day before she did also when we were butting heads...

again im not saying she is making it up, because she called the doc about it today, but it is all just combining up and being hard on me as well. I am trying my best to comfort her, but it is hard when im getting treated bad as well.

Guess im just venting or possibly looking for others who have been in this perdiciment.
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Old 01-27-2011, 09:18 PM
 
Location: Up above the world so high!
45,270 posts, read 86,160,580 times
Reputation: 39670
Quote:
Originally Posted by CelticViking View Post
My wife is going through some mental issues...She has depression, mood swings, etc...She is seeing a counselor, and they are seeing what they can do...

I hope im not being selfish, but I am at my wits ends...She is nasty to me, saying some hurtful things, etc..

I know im not perfect, and ive said some things, but im just stressed.

I feel like im just going down hill...

last night was great...but today we had a little tiff, and now all of a sudden her new meds are causing hallucinations, slurring in the speech...

im not saying shes making it up, but yesterday she didnt have it, but the day before she did also when we were butting heads...

again im not saying she is making it up, because she called the doc about it today, but it is all just combining up and being hard on me as well. I am trying my best to comfort her, but it is hard when im getting treated bad as well.

Guess im just venting or possibly looking for others who have been in this perdiciment.
Living with someone who is emotionally unstable can be very stressful! Hopefully the right medication and levels will be found soon and your wife will start to stabilize.

I am sorry for all you guys are going thru

You need some emotional support right now from someone not so intimately involved in the situation - a neutral third party.

Do you have a minister, rabbi or spiritual advisor you can meet with? It is time for you to reach out to someone besides just strangers on the internet Hang in there!
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Old 01-27-2011, 09:33 PM
 
Location: Raleigh, NC
3,406 posts, read 9,003,653 times
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Yes, I went through the same thing for many years. Depression, paranoia, panic attacks, a complete withdrawal and disassociation from me, from family, friends, and work. She would yell and swear at me, throw things, slam doors (hard enough to break them) and hit me. I couldn't have anything but the briefest conversations with her. I stood by for as long as I could stand to, until the whole situation started to drag me down mentally and physically, until I reached a point of contemplating suicide. That's when I knew the marriage had to end.

Yes, definitely see a counselor if possible, and get her into counseling as well.
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Old 01-27-2011, 10:19 PM
 
Location: Portlandia "burbs"
10,236 posts, read 13,541,785 times
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Celtic, I suggest counseling for yourself, too. A good one would not only help you work through this ordeal better, but also help you through divorce if it turns out to be unavoidable.

Mental and emotional illness is all around us. My family is plagued with it, whereas my husband's family is plagued with depression. I will go to my grave convinced that my mother was bipolar but it wasn't taken as seriously in her time. She could be delightful when she was "up"; unfortunately, she was "down" a lot more, and quite the tyrant when she lost her temper. It was very draining and left its mark, that's for sure.

To live normally within society, they have to WANT to help themselves. Too many of them don't.
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Old 01-27-2011, 10:43 PM
 
829 posts, read 2,509,124 times
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Thank you everyone for helping with your words.
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Old 01-28-2011, 03:05 PM
 
3,573 posts, read 5,461,090 times
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I've been thinking of you, Celtic from the last thread you had here. Yes, counseling would be very good for you and also make sure you don't get her pregnant.

I know it can be frustrating. Hopefully, the new meds will work for her. Good luck to you!
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Old 01-28-2011, 09:57 PM
 
829 posts, read 2,509,124 times
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donie that means a lot...thank you.
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Old 01-29-2011, 08:13 AM
 
Location: St. Louis
9,474 posts, read 16,442,439 times
Reputation: 13184
Hun you are the caregiver in this situation and I can't think of anything more stressful to go through so lighten up on yourself and understand that you're going to have all these feelings and more. Is her family doing anything to help? If not, they should be and you can let them know what they can do to help b/c they may honestly not know. Also, if you're a social type who needs to bounce off of other people, there may be a support group in your area.
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Old 01-29-2011, 08:22 AM
 
Location: Happy wherever I am - Florida now
3,359 posts, read 10,647,787 times
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While she's going through this you need to put up a psychic shield as self protection if you haven't already so that what she says doesn't cut into you.
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Old 01-29-2011, 08:43 AM
 
28,008 posts, read 19,690,113 times
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As someone who has struggled with depression, anxiety and mood issues your post hits me hard Celtic. I'm sure my husband could have written almost the same thing (though I'm not on medications and I am better at handling things now).

I'm so sorry you are going through this. I agree about seeking support from a third party. I also want to let you know that your wife is probably feeling as guilty and "bad" as you are feeling upset. I'm sure she knows that how she is acting is wrong but she can't seem to stop herself from spewing hateful words and acting out in such a negative way. Now, I am not saying this as an attempt to get you to accept the behaviors she is displaying. I'm merely saying that I'm sure she loves you and that her mental issues are as frustrating to her, as they are to you.
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