U.S. CitiesCity-Data Forum Index
Happy Easter!
Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Psychology
 [Register]
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
View detailed profile (Advanced) or search
site with Google Custom Search

Search Forums  (Advanced)
 
 
Old 05-24-2011, 08:53 AM
 
Location: Philadelphia, PA
1,793 posts, read 2,592,801 times
Reputation: 1335

Advertisements

I wonder if the reason why i always feel like i need a girlfriend to be happy is because i have never really liked any of my jobs. It seems like people who are content being single are the ones who have fascinating careers that they are really excited about. While the people who always need to be in a relationship are the ones who don't really have much to look forward to in their jobs. Of course, these days, any job is a good one, and i don't plan on quitting mine anytime soon. Still, the workday for me is more of a necessary evil than a source of happiness and passion.

This would be an interesting psychology study. Its like we need to find our happiness outside of work, since work isn't doing it for us.
Quick reply to this message

 
Old 05-24-2011, 11:07 AM
 
Location: The Triad (NC)
26,847 posts, read 57,851,863 times
Reputation: 29261
Quote:
Originally Posted by lpfan921 View Post
It seems like people who are content being single are the ones who have fascinating careers that they are really excited about. ... Still, the workday for me is more of a necessary evil than a source of happiness and passion.

This would be an interesting psychology study.

Its like we need to find our happiness outside of work, since work isn't doing it for us.
Have you never heard of Maslow's Hierarchy?

Quote:
Originally Posted by MaslowFan
The most fundamental and basic four layers of the (hierarchy) pyramid contain what Maslow called "deficiency needs" or "d-needs": esteem , friendship and love, security, and physical needs.

With the exception of the most fundamental (physiological) needs, if these "deficiency needs" are not met,
the body gives no physical indication but the individual feels anxious and tense. Maslow's theory suggests
that the most basic level of needs must be met before the individual will strongly desire (or focus motivation upon)
the secondary or higher level needs.
Quick reply to this message
 
Old 05-24-2011, 11:12 AM
 
538 posts, read 1,255,365 times
Reputation: 719
Can't say I agree. I once had two simultaneous careers--one paid the bills and the other was my dream job--but it was also the time in my life when I was the most active in dating, relationships, etc. And I loved my job(s) at that point, as well.
Quick reply to this message
 
Old 05-25-2011, 06:34 AM
 
Location: New Albany, IN
832 posts, read 1,312,968 times
Reputation: 1125
Quote:
Originally Posted by lpfan921 View Post
I wonder if the reason why i always feel like i need a girlfriend to be happy is because i have never really liked any of my jobs. It seems like people who are content being single are the ones who have fascinating careers that they are really excited about. While the people who always need to be in a relationship are the ones who don't really have much to look forward to in their jobs. Of course, these days, any job is a good one, and i don't plan on quitting mine anytime soon. Still, the workday for me is more of a necessary evil than a source of happiness and passion.

This would be an interesting psychology study. Its like we need to find our happiness outside of work, since work isn't doing it for us.
Well it's work. It's called that for a reason.

I do notice about myself when my marriage is going well, I can tolerate my job better, even the sh-ttiness. My job certainly is not most people's "dream job" but like you said it's a necessary evil. When I have trouble with my husband, home sucks and work sucks even more than usual.

As for a good job being a replacement for a good relationship outside of work...I don't think it goes that way. Honestly I don't really think people would prefer to have their job than a good romantic/physical relationship, and the people who seem that way either are faking it or don't know what they're missing with a committed, loving partner outside of work.
Quick reply to this message
 
Old 05-25-2011, 06:48 AM
 
Location: Da Region
1,901 posts, read 1,287,682 times
Reputation: 24796
I'm a Jane of all trades, so I've had a lot of jobs. Two of which I've actually loved. Both while single, and got married while doing the second one. I've also had jobs I've hated while single, and while married.

I have been content while single and never had an exciting "career," just a lot of grunt jobs.

But then...I'm a kind of a naturally depressed person, so things don't seem to "corelate" for me like they do other people. I don't see any obvious connections between my job and my marriage, or lack thereof (when I was single). Nor do I see any consistent dsconnects.
Quick reply to this message
 
Old 05-25-2011, 06:53 AM
 
Location: Middle America
35,817 posts, read 39,346,783 times
Reputation: 48613
I've had jobs where I was simply too BUSY to date. My single status hadn't too much to do with how much I liked or disliked my job, but simply due to the fact that I had limited free hours in the day for a social life of any kind, and/ or the work schedule presented a barricade to going out during the times of day when most others would be going out.
Quick reply to this message
 
Old 05-25-2011, 07:01 AM
 
Location: Nebraska
4,179 posts, read 9,115,151 times
Reputation: 9523
I've worked most of my life at jobs where I was forced to 'socialize' and go to meeting after meeting, with different groups, all with different goals, different ideas and purposes, and to bring them all together to coalesce into a single force, purpose, and agreement. Rather like herding cats. Nothing was better than to be able come home after a 12 or 16 hour day of being gregarious, popular (or sometimes verrry UNpopular) and in demand than curling up with DH and making fun of those people.

To me, the only way I was able to function at such a high-speed, in-demand career was to have a sturdy, comfortable, quiet relationship at home. Once that front door closed, the rest of the world was closed out.
Quick reply to this message
 
Old 05-25-2011, 07:17 AM
 
Location: Tucson
42,837 posts, read 77,111,830 times
Reputation: 22814
I agree. Miserable jobs are more tolerable when you look forward to something better after work.
Quick reply to this message
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.

Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.


 
Please update this thread with any new information or opinions. This open thread is still read by thousands of people, so we encourage all additional points of view.

Quick Reply
Message:
Over $104,000 in prizes was already given out to active posters on our forum and additional giveaways are planned!

Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Psychology
Follow City-Data.com founder on our Forum or

All times are GMT -6.

2005-2018, Advameg, Inc.

City-Data.com - Archive 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35 - Top