U.S. CitiesCity-Data Forum Index
Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Psychology
 [Register]
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
View detailed profile (Advanced) or search
site with Google Custom Search

Search Forums  (Advanced)
Reply Start New Thread
 
Old 09-18-2011, 05:38 PM
 
2,726 posts, read 4,364,853 times
Reputation: 1944

Advertisements

Quote:
Originally Posted by Ro2113 View Post
Wait what's so bad about that? Isn't that a good thing? People constantly tell me it is. Don't the self proclaimed "nice guys" only do things for others in order to get something in return?
While you might see it that way, the self-proclaimed "nice guys" do not. They are just doing what they think others expect from them without ever letting their own expectations be known. (At least that is what I think is happening.)
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message

 
Old 09-18-2011, 05:51 PM
 
530 posts, read 567,820 times
Reputation: 1275
Quote:
Originally Posted by HurricaneDC View Post
i swear, it seems every person who's got an abrasive personality has more success with people than folks like me. not just success with women but people in general. for instance one of my housemates is a bit of a total prick to everybody (though I'd say we're friends with each other), yet girls are all over him and people confide in him when they want to talk about personal problems. what the ****?!?!?!? why the hell is it that it's always people like that who seem to attract folks?

i should just start being a douche to every single person I meet. maybe that'll work. god damn it.

yes this is a somewhat alcohol-fuled post.
Well dammit then.....I'll certainly dwink ta that!!
Attached Images
 
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 09-18-2011, 07:06 PM
 
Location: Arizona High Desert
4,636 posts, read 4,947,293 times
Reputation: 2736
Jerks are easier to dump. their jerkiness reaches a toxic level, and we hit that old "eject" button. Goes for both genders. When the dust settles, nice people come to mind, because they aren't full of themselves. keep the faith. Be nice, but don't be too nice, or a doormat.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 09-18-2011, 09:25 PM
 
25,380 posts, read 24,151,643 times
Reputation: 23774
Quote:
Originally Posted by JustJulia View Post
Not saying this is you, Hurri, but a lot of self-proclaimed nice guys seem to be shy, sulky, miserable, or some combination of these.
Oh my goodness, THIS. ^^^
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 09-18-2011, 09:34 PM
 
Location: Pa
42,565 posts, read 42,416,857 times
Reputation: 24873
Quote:
Originally Posted by JordanJP View Post
I'd post pictures to disprove this ridiculous statement, but I would prefer to remain an active poster on C-D. Also, the people who talk the most about small penises usually own one themselves
HeeeeellllllooooO!
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 09-18-2011, 09:38 PM
 
Location: Tucson
42,837 posts, read 77,122,397 times
Reputation: 22814
Quote:
Originally Posted by JordanJP View Post
I'd post pictures to disprove this ridiculous statement, but I would prefer to remain an active poster on C-D.
If you don't get to bang, at least you'll get out of here with a bang!
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 09-18-2011, 09:41 PM
 
Location: Pa
42,565 posts, read 42,416,857 times
Reputation: 24873
OP there is a simple solution to this problem. Kick this dudes ass and then the women will be after you. And he will be seen as a pu$$y.
Haha omg don't do it I was kidding.
Bless your heart your fine the way you are. You will learn with time.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 09-19-2011, 06:43 AM
 
Location: Where Dance Music comes first
1,904 posts, read 2,484,538 times
Reputation: 2240
Nice guys, Bad boys, same difference. Make her feel like she's hot stuff and you're golden. It's that easy.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 09-19-2011, 07:01 AM
 
Location: Davenport, Iowa
2,469 posts, read 3,441,775 times
Reputation: 3403
It might be time for the OP to stop complaining about abrasive guys/jerks/bad boys/whatever phrase you want to call them and take action. Figure out what you're doing wrong if you want to get more attention from these girls or meet up with different kind of girls.

I have a friend whom you might consider "abrasive" when he talks to women. It used to bother me a little since he would get more girls and I would usually have nothing to show for it if I was single. However, I've come to realize that most of the women he was hooking up with weren't the kind I wanted. Some seemed nice and even interesting, but they seemed to lack self-esteem and, therefore, had no problem just hooking up with him. He almost always met these women at a meat market-type bar and I've always had trouble imagining meeting a worthwhile woman there.

Get out, volunteer, join some campus clubs, whatever you can do to be more social. It doesn't seem like you enjoy the typical college hang outs, which is perfectly fine. There are plenty of other things to do and other kinds of people to meet.

I hope I wasn't overly harsh, but I've needed a kick in the pants to get out of the "woe is me" attitude.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 09-19-2011, 08:46 AM
 
Location: Emerald Coast, FL
5,216 posts, read 7,926,930 times
Reputation: 8412
A person may be nice, but if nobody knows about it, it won't influence relationships. A nice person still has to put themselves out there to be noticed, or have other attractive characteristics that gain attention. Potted plants are "nice" to have around the house, but the ones that flower are going to be noticed more.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.

Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.


Reply
Please update this thread with any new information or opinions. This open thread is still read by thousands of people, so we encourage all additional points of view.

Quick Reply
Message:

Over $104,000 in prizes was already given out to active posters on our forum and additional giveaways are planned!

Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Psychology
Follow City-Data.com founder on our Forum or

All times are GMT -6.

2005-2018, Advameg, Inc.

City-Data.com - Archive 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35 - Top