U.S. CitiesCity-Data Forum Index
Covid-19 Information Page
Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Psychology
 [Register]
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
View detailed profile (Advanced) or search
site with Google Custom Search

Search Forums  (Advanced)
View Poll Results: Do self-described gay men have any attraction to women?
No, stupid. That's what it means to be gay. 4 25.00%
No. 5 31.25%
If they have male qualities, perhaps. 0 0%
I much prefer men, but have a mild attraction to women. 5 31.25%
I'm lazy and go after whatever's easiest. 1 6.25%
I like women better. I shouldn't have responded. Too late. 1 6.25%
Voters: 16. You may not vote on this poll

 
 
Old 01-07-2013, 06:41 PM
 
Location: Missouri, USA
5,442 posts, read 3,530,633 times
Reputation: 2536

Advertisements

If you're a self-described gay man, do you have any attraction to women? (see survey)

survey question options:
  1. No, stupid. That's what it means to be gay.
  2. No.
  3. If they have male qualities, perhaps.
  4. I much prefer men, but have a mild attraction to women.
  5. I am lazy and go after whatever's easiest.
  6. I like women better. I should not have responded. Too late.

Last edited by Clintone; 01-07-2013 at 06:53 PM..
Rate this post positively Quick reply to this message

 
Old 01-08-2013, 03:00 AM
 
Location: Kansas City, MO
3,572 posts, read 6,988,142 times
Reputation: 2589
In all honesty, what is your motivation for asking this question?

It's an interesting question, but the motivation behind it is just as interesting.
Rate this post positively Quick reply to this message
 
Old 01-08-2013, 03:26 AM
 
Location: Missouri, USA
5,442 posts, read 3,530,633 times
Reputation: 2536
Quote:
Originally Posted by MOKAN View Post
In all honesty, what is your motivation for asking this question?

It's an interesting question, but the motivation behind it is just as interesting.
Someone I know believes option #5 is most likely to be true.

Self-described homosexuals seem to repeatedly state that homosexuality is not a choice though, which implies a persistent attraction towards the same sex, and much less of an attraction, if any, towards the opposite sex (I'd think).

I figured I'd ask which is true, to learn.

I don't want to deal with too many variables, so the question only applies to gay men, rather than all homosexuals.

Last edited by Clintone; 01-08-2013 at 03:40 AM..
Rate this post positively Quick reply to this message
 
Old 01-08-2013, 04:37 AM
 
Location: Kansas City, MO
3,572 posts, read 6,988,142 times
Reputation: 2589
Quote:
Originally Posted by Clintone View Post
Someone I know believes option #5 is most likely to be true.

Self-described homosexuals seem to repeatedly state that homosexuality is not a choice though, which implies a persistent attraction towards the same sex, and much less of an attraction, if any, towards the opposite sex (I'd think).

I figured I'd ask which is true, to learn.

I don't want to deal with too many variables, so the question only applies to gay men, rather than all homosexuals.
I think there are certainly men out there who fit option #5. They are a bit perverted and devious, but I don't think they're gay. Some may be bisexual, if there truly is such a thing (remember, the act alone is not necessarily indicative of ones orientation). It seems like gay men are a bit repulsed by women sexually, especially by vaginas, which is why I'd think straight men are more likely to fit option #5.

Something I wonder about gay males is if they get aroused at all by seeing all-female porn.
Rate this post positively Quick reply to this message
 
Old 01-08-2013, 05:13 AM
 
Location: The western periphery of Terra Australis
24,682 posts, read 49,084,410 times
Reputation: 11862
I do wonder about the being repulsed by vaginas or boobs thing. I think it's culturally conditioned. Just like straight men are conditioned to mind the twig and berries 'gross', it's the same for gay men. I'm straight but I don't find the male anatomy gross at all; that'd be weird, I have it and I live with it, I'm pretty darn familiar with it. Seeing a guy's junk just doesn't do anything for me. Why SHOULD a gay man be 'repulsed' by a vagina? Shouldn't he just be not turned on by it? Unless it's aesthetics.

I've actually met plenty of gay men who said they could have a relationship or fall in love with women but just weren't sexually into them.
Rate this post positively Quick reply to this message
 
Old 01-08-2013, 05:20 AM
 
Location: Kansas City, MO
3,572 posts, read 6,988,142 times
Reputation: 2589
Quote:
Originally Posted by Trimac20 View Post
I do wonder about the being repulsed by vaginas or boobs thing. I think it's culturally conditioned. Just like straight men are conditioned to mind the twig and berries 'gross', it's the same for gay men. I'm straight but I don't find the male anatomy gross at all; that'd be weird, I have it and I live with it, I'm pretty darn familiar with it. Seeing a guy's junk just doesn't do anything for me. Why SHOULD a gay man be 'repulsed' by a vagina? Shouldn't he just be not turned on by it? Unless it's aesthetics.

I've actually met plenty of gay men who said they could have a relationship or fall in love with women but just weren't sexually into them.
I haven't known other straight men to be repulsed or feel the need to say they are about male genitalia the way gay men do about female genitalia. There are a lot of twigs and berries in straight porn - it's not a big deal, we are just not turned on by it. Which leaves the question, why do gay men show a display of being repulsed by female genitalia?
Rate this post positively Quick reply to this message
 
Old 01-08-2013, 05:24 AM
 
Location: The western periphery of Terra Australis
24,682 posts, read 49,084,410 times
Reputation: 11862
Quote:
Originally Posted by MOKAN View Post
I haven't known other straight men to be repulsed or feel the need to say they are about male genitalia the way gay men do about female genitalia. There are a lot of twigs and berries in straight porn - it's not a big deal, we are just not turned on by it. Which leaves the question, why do gay men show a display of being repulsed by female genitalia?
I personally don't believe sexuality is 100% inborn. I think to some extent it's even stretchable. I don't deny that many are born with a strong tendency in one way, but I think once they realise 'I'm gay' they begin to think that they're gay and gays should behave a certain way, so being repulsed by female sexual organs is part of that. Yet paradoxically, they fawn over strong female role models and anything else female, except the sexuality. They relate when Barbra Streisand sings about lost love, yet would cringe if she alluded to female sexuality.
Rate this post positively Quick reply to this message
 
Old 01-08-2013, 10:50 AM
 
4,761 posts, read 12,374,922 times
Reputation: 7902
I think "prefer" is the best word to use. Gay men are attracted to and prefer to fool around with other men. And would be "more" attracted to younger good looking (20's, 30's) men.

HOWEVER... Most men are "versatile". They can become erect with just about anyone (male or female) touching them. And most can fool around with anyone (male or female) and "get off". But when they are doing it with someone they are not attracted to (do not prefer), then it is not exciting and would lack passion, but gets the job done.

They can also "think" about a good looking man or picture a man in their minds while doing it with a woman or unattractive man.

And same with straight men. They prefer women, are attracted to women. But can do it with another man. Good examples of this are prisons or ships at sea where no women are available.

And sex to most men I know is like eating. You eat, then no longer are hungry. They have sex by whatever means is available (including taking care of matters themselves), then no longer have the "urge".

Women are entirely different. Most women I know need to be "in love" with a person before doing it. They don't tend to go out and do it with anyone just to get off (as men do).

Then of course there are exceptions to all the above.
Rate this post positively Quick reply to this message
 
Old 01-08-2013, 02:44 PM
 
Location: Missouri, USA
5,442 posts, read 3,530,633 times
Reputation: 2536
Quote:
Originally Posted by Billy_J View Post
I think "prefer" is the best word to use. Gay men are attracted to and prefer to fool around with other men. And would be "more" attracted to younger good looking (20's, 30's) men.

HOWEVER... Most men are "versatile". They can become erect with just about anyone (male or female) touching them. And most can fool around with anyone (male or female) and "get off". But when they are doing it with someone they are not attracted to (do not prefer), then it is not exciting and would lack passion, but gets the job done.

They can also "think" about a good looking man or picture a man in their minds while doing it with a woman or unattractive man.

And same with straight men. They prefer women, are attracted to women. But can do it with another man. Good examples of this are prisons or ships at sea where no women are available.

And sex to most men I know is like eating. You eat, then no longer are hungry. They have sex by whatever means is available (including taking care of matters themselves), then no longer have the "urge".

Women are entirely different. Most women I know need to be "in love" with a person before doing it. They don't tend to go out and do it with anyone just to get off (as men do).

Then of course there are exceptions to all the above.
I'm one of the men who is horrified at the thought of having sexual relations with a guy. That might have been learned from and enforced by society, rather than being something born with, and perhaps these learnings tinkered with my subconscious (not that I'd want to change that).

Why would there be such an opposition to homosexuality throughout society if most men are aroused by anyone? I've heard many heterosexual men say they'd be disgusted by having an intimate physical relationship with other males.
Rate this post positively Quick reply to this message
 
Old 01-08-2013, 02:46 PM
 
13,889 posts, read 19,366,317 times
Reputation: 16003
One needs to know what sexuality is to make any assumptions. I shall leave this to better times though, as it's stirring the pot and hijacking the thread. But have my word, most of previously expressed assumptions are wrong because of this.
Key word is - self-described. Is the person true gay, or homosexual, or it is a choice of some sort? Self described inclines me to make assumption, that for reason one or another, person made decision to lean into a specific sexual orientation.
That needs to be clarified first, right? As true male homosexual, or prevalent "feeling" in a male physical body,will not be attracted to females. Interestingly enough, they, females, will feel this very well, and categorize such a person as "safe" to have around.
Now, if someone has "desire", or male, in him, to a certain degree, that will lead to a certain degree of attraction to females. From that on, it is proportionate to how much desire is prevailing over feeling, and visa versa. That's when you start getting into confused types, that can not determine themselves into a specific orientation, or change, as that equation changes through their lives, along with physical and mental changes. Those are usually homo/hetero/pan/bi- sexuals of all kinds and flavors - by choice.
Then of course, you have the "Roman" category - ones that had so much of sexual encounters with a specific gender, that they got fed up with it, and nothing tickles them anymore. So, they seek new triggers for their sexual appetite.
Hence, the final answer is - as always - it depends.
Rate this post positively Quick reply to this message
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.

Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.


 
Please update this thread with any new information or opinions. This open thread is still read by thousands of people, so we encourage all additional points of view.

Quick Reply
Message:
Over $104,000 in prizes was already given out to active posters on our forum and additional giveaways are planned!

Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Psychology

All times are GMT -6.

© 2005-2021, Advameg, Inc. · Please obey Forum Rules · Terms of Use and Privacy Policy · Bug Bounty

City-Data.com - Contact Us - Archive 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35, 36, 37 - Top