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So I was thinking recently about how important it is to talk to other people (psychologist, close friend or relative or mentor) when you go through a transitional period in life; when you need an outside perspective because your own is too close to the situation, and the idea of hiring a life coach came to mind. BUT...I know one life coach who is a total narcissist and makes it about her instead of her clients. Hence my trepidation.
Has anyone ever worked with a life coach and found it more helpful than going to see a psychologist? Or do you think life coaches are just paid quacks?
Well ANYONE could give bad advice including psychologists and life coaches or friends. Or they may give good advice.
I find the best thing to do (so far as asking friends for advice) is ask 5 different people with 5 different ages/backgrounds for advice.
Most of them will say the same basic thing. That is the correct advice usually.
If you just ask one person, there is a greater chance some of the advice might not be the best. No one person knows the answers to all problems!
Or if you ask 5 people all the same age, all the same religion, or all the same sex, you might get "tainted" answers. Like if you are male and having problems with your wife, then ask 5 male friends for advice, they might all say "It is her fault! You are right, she is wrong!" But if also asking women, they may help you understand your wife from her perspective, maybe compromise or have a better understanding of her feelings.
Another thing I go by is the "little voice" in the back of my head. Is that voice saying the advice given to me sounds like good advice? Or does it not sound right? And the way "I feel" after someone talks to me. Do I feel good? Do I feel better? Or do I feel frustrated, depressed, down, rotten, etc.?
Go with your feelings. Good advice feels good and right.
Life coach, hah... Oh the ways people make money of naive and ignorant....
You ever heard of priests? They have been doing that job for couple thousand years by now, in full confidentiality. It's called confession. It's free last time I checked also.
I think a life coach could be very helpful...if you get the right one (because like other professions, not everyone is qualified). It also depends on where you are in your life and how you live. If you are very self motivated and know where you're going and how to get there, I'm not sure how much a coach can help. But most people don't fall into that category so just a little guidance and accountability can help tremendously.
Before hiring a coach, ask for 3 references and call them and ask what specifically has improved in their lives since hiring that coach.
i know two life coaches and both are wonderful people with a ton to offer.
one specialises in adults and families with disability issues. she coaches on life plans and relationships etc. the disabled people i work with adore her groups, because she understands that they also crave relationships and need tools just as everyone else does.
she also helps them with planning for their future, which so many leave to chance.
my other coach friend specifically works with people who want a better understanding of the law of attraction and she's frankly brilliant at it.
i'm extremely lucky to have these people as friends,lol!
If you don't have that "Dutch Uncle" with the size 13 boots willing to deliver a swift kick as needed...
the question still comes back to whether person X or Y is a good or the right substitute.
Has anyone ever worked with a life coach and found it more helpful than going to see a psychologist? Or do you think life coaches are just paid quacks?
Absolutely not. IF I want to talk to a professional, I will go to a psychologist. Many claim to be psychics & such. Umm...no thanks. I think many have been successful in handling their own life challenges, and feel qualified to tell others what to do. And they are very good marketers. And are charismatic.
Just checking the qualifications in my town, and I see that costs < $1000 to become a life coach.....I see 7 advertised: 1 is a LMFT, 1 is a new age spirituality/meditation coach, another is a holistic coach, 2 have a BA's in psychology, while most had no training except personal experience & life coach training.
I actually thought about it once but ultimately decided against it. I went through a HUGE life transition and did end up seeing a therapist for a couple months just to "talk out" everything, which did me a world of good and spared my family/friends from getting burnt out. There was a divorce and many legal people suggested career counselors/life coaches but it was costly and and I realized that these people would be getting my money to give me STOCK advice, they didn't know me in a personal way and could only look at the answers I gave to the tests, quizzes, etc. they would give me. Instead I let those closest to me give me advice and then did what I wanted anyway .
But here's the thing, everyone I know has always considered me something of a life coach because I'm a very logical and clear headed person and I have a natural talent for giving good advise . I just have a harder time doing those things myself so having a few good people that I trust in my life is key. If I didn't, I may have actually gone to someone but I don't know if it would have done any good.
I had someone try to convince me a while back to get a life coach. She told me it helped her.
I think a choice like this is purely subjective and goes with your gut. Some people believe in psychologist, some believe in the church/temple, some believe in family support, some believe in self help. You may even find a friend who can provide this sort of support.
The bottom line is, in whatever choice you make, I think it only takes a session or two to realize if that person is helping you or not. It's no different then going to a holistic healer or a chiropractor or acupuncture some other medical help outside the box - for some it helps and others it doesn't.
And to the original question of quack or professional - I find this question degrading. You may personally not like this sort of person or they may not help you, but that person made a professional career decision and does help people, so why do people like to insult and call others quacks?
Life coach is a scam really, just look at the course: all mumbo jumbo containing some excerpts from books ranging to "new age topics" to "motivational" stuff all mixed in a big yadda yadda about doing this and you will get that...and often that isn't true.
A psychologist is a serious career. Life coaching is not. Most life coaches are done online in a short period of time after paying $1,000 or something like that. Psychology is done in a serious university. Sorry but after meeting two female life coaches I'm not convinced, that is really necessary. One has some sort of bipolar disorder and the other one is a bible hugger with some traits of OCD. Not convinced that helps really since I've read about it, and it's not helpful to them, they cannot help anyone, they just repeat things they are not even following on their own lives, why should I ?.
An I put an example: one life coach told me regarding a situation involving us two (not as a client): Only God forgives...I'm no God to forgive anyone...and yes, she is a resentful individual. Do you think I would like to get advice from a person this unstable? No.
Don't get me wroing...she is a pro on her life coaching stuff, she repeats everything told on the books. But isn't that convincing after knowing her in a more personal level.
If you feel like it, talk to a psychologist, better (hands down!) than life coach. Most are life coaches anyway.
But better yet, talk with your parents, friends, older brother, but I know sometimes is hard to find someone who really cares.
If you are a catholic a priest also can help. Priest (unlike pastors) is 7 years in a seminar, and they have the studies, not only theological but also in humanity as well.
Self help books are also a good source, however I recommend only one author: Wayne Dyer. Tony Robbins: it's all mumbo jumbo mostly...Dale Carnagie was okay for 60 or 70 standards.
So there you go...my 2 cents!
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