U.S. CitiesCity-Data Forum Index
Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Psychology
 [Register]
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
View detailed profile (Advanced) or search
site with Google Custom Search

Search Forums  (Advanced)
Reply Start New Thread
 
Old 03-02-2013, 07:24 PM
 
Location: Tampa, Florida
666 posts, read 947,918 times
Reputation: 525

Advertisements

LOL, maybe the title of the thread is extreme, but let's discuss, why would you choose between being positive or negative?

ISSUES TO CONSIDER

1. Does being negative solve any problem or issue? In other words, expecting the worse or declaring the worse will really help?
2. In what extent does being positive help and when it becomes a naivete?
3. Is being positive today being delusional? For example, we all want to believe that society will improve. But, is it realistic to hope for it in the current mindset we have?
4. What is it required for people to have success in life?
5. Does hard work really pay? For everyone? Do we rely on luck and some cheating to succeed in life?
6. Why does it seem that life is better for the cheaters and the dishonest?
7. Is being smart today being confused with being a cheater?
8. Where are we headed to?
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message

 
Old 03-02-2013, 08:24 PM
 
Location: Naptowne, Alaska
15,595 posts, read 34,275,858 times
Reputation: 14645
This is a subject my wife and I bump heads about sometimes. I tend to be more laid back and feel things will work out in the end, regardless of how big or small of a matter it might be.
She tends to worry about things more, and it frustrates her at times because I don't take things seriously enough.

Especially if I ask her to just relax or don't worry about it...it'll all work out! We can't control everything that happens in life. You just have to take it as it comes and deal with it best you can.

That gets her fired up like a rocket some times!

(and incase you see this Hon...I luv ya!)
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 03-02-2013, 10:16 PM
 
4,762 posts, read 9,950,090 times
Reputation: 7767
["Is being positive today being delusional? For example, we all want to believe that society will improve."]

As for that, I am a very positive person generally, however I am also realistic. I have a negative view of the above (society is going down the tubes so far as I am concerned...)

["What is it required for people to have success in life?"]

Now that is something to be positive about! Let's just say if you are always telling yourself things can't be done, then you probably will not even try. Thus missed opportunities. Say "I think I can" and you will try. And at least succeed a few times!

["Does hard work really pay?"]

Yes! But not right this second. And not always. Big dividends in the long run. You may spend a LOT of your time learning about and researching something for your current job. And they may give you NOTHING in return. But later that knowledge (and hard work) usually comes in handy elsewhere. Maybe at another job, a good reference from your previous job, or in your personal life. I've learned things on my own time which have come in quite handy in my personal life. (Like how to fix things properly.)

["Why does it seem that life is better for the cheaters and the dishonest?"]

Ahhh my favorite subject. Cheaters! They do succeed in the short run, but run into great difficulty in the long run. Say someone who is getting people to answer school test questions for them on the internet. For now they get good grades, but what happens later when they get a job and need to know that information? They will not be working very long!

The hard worker, in contrast, learns all the information and then succeeds in the work world.

Or playing games of skill. A cheater may be able to distract his opponent and make him mess up. So he wins that particular game. However the hard worker is consistently better at playing the game due to practice and learning. So over a series of many games, the hard worker wins. Also at higher level tournaments, there are referees watching. The cheater can no longer cheat nor rely on that to win. He is out of the tournament with a quickness!
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 03-03-2013, 11:53 PM
 
2,700 posts, read 2,427,066 times
Reputation: 5948
Quote:
Originally Posted by espizarro View Post
LOL, maybe the title of the thread is extreme, but let's discuss, why would you choose between being positive or negative?

ISSUES TO CONSIDER

1. Does being negative solve any problem or issue? In other words, expecting the worse or declaring the worse will really help?
2. In what extent does being positive help and when it becomes a naivete?
3. Is being positive today being delusional? For example, we all want to believe that society will improve. But, is it realistic to hope for it in the current mindset we have?
4. What is it required for people to have success in life?
5. Does hard work really pay? For everyone? Do we rely on luck and some cheating to succeed in life?
6. Why does it seem that life is better for the cheaters and the dishonest?
7. Is being smart today being confused with being a cheater?
8. Where are we headed to?

Interesting question. To illustrate let's use the typical glass half full / half empty illustration.


People are often asked a question and forced to make a binary decision. Well, what happens when the response is along the lines of, it appears to be half full of a gas (presuming air) and half liquid, or it appears to be a 32 oz container with 16 oz of liquid in it. It could be good if its water and I'm thirsty or it could be a poisonous liquid etc....


The whole scope of perspective you want to gage is easily swayed by more detail and context. That being said here's my answers to your questions:


1. Does being negative solve any problem or issue? In other words, expecting the worse or declaring the worse will really help?

Expecting the worse no, BUT planning for and considering worst case scenarios is always good as is a healthy paranoia. This is concept former Intel Chairmen Andy Grove talked about (in business sense). This can also apply to personal survival in todays world.

Or in athletics such as famed Negro league pitcher Satchel Paige "Don't look back something may be gaining on you".

In both cases it is a mindset that ensures an enduring pursuit of excellence in whatever one's respective field of endeavor. Also in the 'relationship' realm having lower expectations (play on a comedy sketch about dating) means less heart ache, as one doesn't build up unrealistic fantasy / ideals etc...

2. In what extent does being positive help and when it becomes a naivete?

Having a positive outlook helps foremost when it is an overarching belief in the long term, that, if I know that by doing some of the most meaningless fundamental tasks better and better I will eventually achieve a future success, or more importantly you will as an individual feel better about your own efforts in relation to the outcome as you have given it your best and didn't have to second guess yourself with questions of whether you had done this or that differently. A positive outlook is when you realize that even in your self perceived failures you LEARNED something of value in life whether how to interpret others intent meaning etc... or just what you do not have an interest or affinity toward.

It's naive when you do not expand the scope to see how the overarching activities within a system (whatever it may be: arenas of employment / workplace, economic systems, relationships, etc...) may not reward you in the manner you 'think' they should. Many systems human beings interact within are amoral. So bringing a "positive/negative" mindset into them may not have as much impact as you think.

3. Is being positive today being delusional? For example, we all want to believe that society will improve. But, is it realistic to hope for it in the current mindset we have?

Not necessarily, but identifying the hurdles and getting the majority of society to reorient the focus of solving problems is tantamount to self torture. Again, I will relate to the systems within which we as humankind have evolved to this point as the main socialization / power structure parameters (Business- Economic- Financial Models) and conditioning agents (Mass Media of various forms, Religious belief constructs). Historically, major changes in overall societal mindset have some spark that ignites those brief times of unity of thought toward a major goal. This is analogous to why political entities use (and often create) enemies around which a large population can unite against. Of note here, most every one of these types of movements are negative in nature. Whereas, for a positive example you had President JFK proclaim a goal toward a positive end (i.e. Get a Man to The Moon). Personally, I just don't see it trending upward in the immediate future on our world as we now know it. Bill Hicks comedian had an interesting discussion on this in his sketch, "Life Is Just A Ride"

4. What is it required for people to have success in life?

This is a floating parameter depending on an individual's current socio economic status and their various values systems which are predicated most formally in philosophical / cultural mindset. If you have virtually 'nothing' gaining something is usually perceived as success. If your portion / status is declining in relative terms most of those people will perceive dwindling 'success', yet one may be of a sect / order / and have a totally different perspective based on the value system (priorities ranked in their lives).

5. Does hard work really pay? For everyone? Do we rely on luck and some cheating to succeed in life?

This again will vary based on an individuals cultural value system. I would concur with a prior poster on the luck / cheating with one caveat. That is the presumption that ALL are treated the same under the current legal system. If those who control the major mechanisms (Business - Economic - Financial - Justice - Mass Media) do not abide by, or can twist the legal structure to their advantage, whereby, they are not subject to the same degree of penalties in accord with their crimes, yet the individual citizen is hounded, you end up with an environment (in the USA) much like what those who fought for independence from England.

6. Why does it seem that life is better for the cheaters and the dishonest?

Because too often Mass Media plays up these stories for their conflict controversy and only focuses on the parts that are most effective in stirring up others for ratings. It's sort of like a story with no good denouement. Again see answer to #5 regarding legal system integrity. As occasionally, it seems it is the best legal system money can buy.

7. Is being smart today being confused with being a cheater?

I think every 'smart' person, in the course of trying to understand how a 'system' works within various 'realms of play' looks at some point at ways to accelerate their position in the heirarchy's of power (or however success / status is measured within it) and each based upon their values makes choices. (A good read to illustrate is Mark Twain's short story about the Man with no conscience and read Tolstoy's short story, How Much Land Does One Man Need?)

In athletics, there is an adage you may have heard "If you're not cheating you're not trying". Again I will go back to legal systems whether in arenas of sports or justice. These things often do not get addressed until after the violator has enjoyed the 'benefits/fruits' from their actions. This can be the most unsettling. For example, person 'A' engages in activity providing disproportional 'reward' and then rather than being made to pay restitution then uses another institution of control Mass Media (fourth estate) to then profit more from telling how they 'did it'. This may be a whole separate topic for discussion. It will be interesting to see how the Lance Armstrong versus sponsors legal cases turn out.


8. Where are we headed to?

At current trends I don't foresee much good other than when enough people get squeezed too much by various means you get flare ups. See various riots around the world. Greece austerity measures etc... instances like Tata Motors in India where the employees rose up (killed CEO), I think you'll see more and more as those in control continue to be like the old American Native adage "He who speak with forked tongue". At it's simplest Life Is Not Fair, but don't let that stop you from trying.

The overarching response I would have to this 'binary' question is another adage that is very true.

Pray as if everything's up to 'God'
Work as if everything's up to 'You'.

And lastly, for sanity, remember another, "ALL work and no play makes Jack a dull boy"
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 03-04-2013, 07:16 AM
 
518 posts, read 815,434 times
Reputation: 658
The Law of Attraction (The Secret) states what you think and feel is what you will attract INTO your LIFE. It's not just "positive" thinking. It's visualizing and feeling as though you already have that which you seek/want.

It's a simple philosophy but not easy to incorporate into our daily life because we've all become conditioned to responding (and feeling) in a negative way whenever something bad or undesirable occurs in our life.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 03-04-2013, 05:20 PM
 
588 posts, read 756,402 times
Reputation: 494
It's a choice [to be negative or positive]. I don't think being negative solves problems. Sometimes it makes them worse. On top of having that specific problem, now the negative thinking causes depression or anxiety. The person can spiral downward into the depths of despair.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 03-04-2013, 07:01 PM
 
132 posts, read 151,971 times
Reputation: 152
Quote:
Originally Posted by Apotamkin_Renesmee View Post
The Law of Attraction (The Secret) states what you think and feel is what you will attract INTO your LIFE. It's not just "positive" thinking. It's visualizing and feeling as though you already have that which you seek/want.

It's a simple philosophy but not easy to incorporate into our daily life because we've all become conditioned to responding (and feeling) in a negative way whenever something bad or undesirable occurs in our life.
That was a good book/movie, I need to incorporate it more into my life right about now.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 03-04-2013, 08:22 PM
 
Location: Gettysburg, PA
1,505 posts, read 1,462,036 times
Reputation: 2609
I won't answer all your questions (in middle of a writing), but I'll do the ones that come quick to me.


1. Does being negative solve any problem or issue? In other words, expecting the worse or declaring the worse will really help?

In my life, it helps me set up my mind to take into consideration the worst possible thing that can happen so that when it happens, I am more mentally prepared for it. And if it doesn't then I'm that much happier for whatever did happen, because it wasn't the worst.


4. What is it required for people to have success in life?

Luck is a large part of it. Determination. Talent. Unfortunately though, many things people take for granted in their life they owe to luck.


5. Does hard work really pay? For everyone? Do we rely on luck and some cheating to succeed in life?

I think sometimes that it can. Unfortunately, it doesn't seem to me that it pays off for everyone; some people seem to be destined for tragedy. I'm not sure if we rely on luck, but it certainly does help to have some to succeed--some people may rely on it.


6. Why does it seem that life is better for the cheaters and the dishonest?

I am a religious person, so my answer may not be one you agree with. Those who love this world and use dishonest methods to get ahead in it are going to, most of the time, do better in it because it seems to me that those are often the ways of this world, that is, if you equate having lots of wealth as having a better life. If you measure success by other methods, then I would not see the lives of cheaters and dishonest people as being better than those who are not.


7. Is being smart today being confused with being a cheater?
I don't think so, though perhaps some people do.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 03-05-2013, 08:21 PM
 
Location: Tucson/Nogales
16,156 posts, read 19,588,774 times
Reputation: 21870
The wonderful benefits to being constantly negative, like myself, is being that you're always thinking of the worst that can always happen, when it doesn't materialize, you have many joyous celebrations!

Through the years, I've observed both the negative and postive types, and I wouldn't change places with the positive thinkers any day of the year! Being my opposites, thinking on the best is going to happen, what happens to these characters when the best doesn't happen, and the worst happens?

Ever see a plane fall from the skies?

And always bear in mind: The basis of optimism is sheer terror!
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 03-05-2013, 08:48 PM
 
Location: Tampa, Florida
666 posts, read 947,918 times
Reputation: 525
Quote:
Originally Posted by tijlover View Post
The wonderful benefits to being constantly negative, like myself, is being that you're always thinking of the worst that can always happen, when it doesn't materialize, you have many joyous celebrations!

Through the years, I've observed both the negative and postive types, and I wouldn't change places with the positive thinkers any day of the year! Being my opposites, thinking on the best is going to happen, what happens to these characters when the best doesn't happen, and the worst happens?

Ever see a plane fall from the skies?

And always bear in mind: The basis of optimism is sheer terror!
I kind of agree with this somewhat. Being positive to the point lf naivete and delusion only causes harm. Unless the person is extremely strong in character and can handle not so great surprises with ease, being positive generally will cause problems after problems. Being extremely negative is not good in the sense that you can look at negatives where they simply may not exist. i see the best thing is to always be realistic. Most humans for what I see, are delusionally positive. This is why so many people end up leaving their job, divorcing, breaking up with friends through the years, and overall not being happy. My observations.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.

Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.


Reply
Please update this thread with any new information or opinions. This open thread is still read by thousands of people, so we encourage all additional points of view.

Quick Reply
Message:

Over $104,000 in prizes was already given out to active posters on our forum and additional giveaways are planned!

Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Psychology
Follow City-Data.com founder on our Forum or

All times are GMT -6.

2005-2017, Advameg, Inc.

City-Data.com - Archive 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35 - Top