Reasons Why Our Behavior Changes Around People (woman, thoughts, issues)
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Well, I think that one's tendency to behave a certain way in the workplace is sometimes greatly at odds with how they choose to behave in a different, perhaps social setting.
If you want to be a 'good employee', you will behave in the way that management prefers that you do.
And in SOME places, that behavior isn't always very 'nice'.
Some places actually encourage workers to be two-faced and/or backstabbing and to spy on co-workers.
Speaking for myself and just in general, the more I like someone, the more I 'ape' their mannerisms when talking to them!!!!
I don't consciously set out to do it.
But plenty of times I 'catch' myself doing so!!!
I guess, since I like them, it's a way of feeling closer to them, or a way of giving them my 'stamp of approval.'
But, yes. I've seen plenty of those 'experiments' on TV, when they'll have one person (the ringer) break some kind of minor social taboo and that seems to give the go ahead to others to follow suit!!
Like stealing a newspaper or something on that order.
And at it's worst, I guess it's what they mean by 'mob mentality'. (Same thing as the other term that was mentioned -- herd mentality.)
If a LOT of people take part in some sort of outrageous behavior, the more likely it is that more will join in!!
If 'everyone' is doing it, they don't feel that they, individually, are going to be judged.
You know how they had/have those cute, funny flash mobs!!!?
A group of strangers all show up at a certain place at a certain time and all take part in singing and/or dancing or other amusing and entertaining activities.
Well, in my neck of the woods, it has (d)evolved into something much more sinister!!!
It work's pretty much the same way as any flash mob does -- except the activity is to beat the crap out of whatever innocent people happen to be there and then to rob them.
Something akin to wilding, perhaps.
In the workplace, I am warm and friendly to everyone, regardless of how I feel about them.
In any other setting, I'll be polite and respectful to people I don't care for -- but I won't spend any more time interacting with them than I have to.
If you want to be a 'good employee', you will behave in the way that management prefers that you do.
And in SOME places, that behavior isn't always very 'nice'.
Some places actually encourage workers to be two-faced and/or backstabbing and to spy on co-workers.
I've encountered this all too often at my workplace. My boss loves to initiate political discussions in the office, badmouth people behind their backs, etc. This is something I'll never be able to stand for.
It's interesting to consider the 2 main motivations behind this phenomenon. One reason people adjust their persona to fit their company is to fit in and be accepted. The other reason is to appease and please others, make them feel comfortable. I see the persona shifting go on and when the object is to fit in, I view it as somewhat pathetic. However when the aim is to "people please" and make sure everyone is "happy" I feel bad for the person doing the acting because I know how taxing that can be.
I'm sure having to change your personality to fit a given situation can be extremely taxing.
I'm a big psychology geek (I minored in it) and enjoy observing human behavior. Lately I've noticed that many of my friends tend to act a certain way when I'm having one-to-one conversations with them, but behave differently when they're in the presence of other people. This phenomenon is discussed in more detail here: Reasons Why Our Behavior Changes Based On Who We’re With
I've especially noticed this in the workplace. Some people are nice and polite when having one-to-one conversations, but become jerks when they're around others who act like jerks themselves. I feel it's because people have an innate drive to fit in, and in the end, they're looking out for themselves.
The mindset is something along these lines: "If the jerk in accounting can help me get a promotion, I'll try to mirror his personality as much as possible -- whether by telling similar jokes, acting as silly as he does, etc. That way, he'll like me more and thus do his part to get me the promotion."
It's amazing how people take on different personas when it's most convenient for them.
Have you guys noticed this in anyone you know?
I haven't noticed this except with con artists. What I have noticed is that people are more guarded among those they don't know, and more relaxed and show more of their unique personality when they're among friends and others who know them well and accept them. That seems very reasonable, and not particularly remarkable. Anyone who would morph into a jerk to fit in, anyone that desperate to fit in, is someone I'd give a very wide berth.
I think a well adjusted person should have a range of behaviors. The motivations for the behavior don’t change. I think humans have evolved to be social and people who don't adjust their behavior slightly to fit into different situations would be considered to have personality problems.
I think a well adjusted person should have a range of behaviors. The motivations for the behavior don’t change. I think humans have evolved to be social and people who don't adjust their behavior slightly to fit into different situations would be considered to have personality problems.
A little "personality tweaking" is okay so long as it doesn't change the very essence of your personality.
Of course. Who hasn't been around people in the presence of their boss? Anyone else ever notice that no matter how stupid the boss's joke is, all his employees laugh?
I see this issue in a more metaphysical way. We are actually DIFFERENT with different people . . . in the sense that we are not the same person, based on our relationship or interaction. I see this as an energetic thing - based on biology, karma, personality, and other variables.
This is different than "play-acting," to fit in in a corporate environment or something (which people have to do for survival reasons).
Definitely, the group or pack mentality is inbuilt into all of us. That's why mobs of people can do horrendous evil that an individual wouldn't dream of doing. It diffuses the responsibility. I'm sure we've all experienced in, perhaps back in school when we all participated in bullying someone in a group.
And yes, our behaviour is definitely influenced by who we're with. That's why I'm beginning to realise it's not always snobbish to want to avoid 'bad company.'
I believe what you've said, but I still think it takes a lesser individual to do evil things just because the responsibility is "diffused". This reminds me of how drug and alcohol addiction is said to cause demoralization and people to do things they normally wouldn't, like steal. I do believe addiction is demoralizing, however I still think people are different and some have a much lower threshold for doing bad things because that's just who they are.
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