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We are not the descendents of those humans who were not disposed, by conviction or incapacity, to have children. It stands to reason that most people - including men - would prefer to have kids. The question posed in this thread is whether in men that preference is initially weak, but then rises to a crescendo at some point in life; and secondly, whether that rise occurs later in life, than it does for women.
Avowed aversion to having children is a rare property in both men and women, but my feeling is that it is more common in men. If say 95% of women are interested in having kids (this admittedly not scientifically-derived number comes from my running various screens using the Plenty of Fish dating site), while 90% of men are likewise interested, the number of child-free men is double that of child-free women. This suggests that half of child-free men will find themselves pressured by their partners to reproduce.
My personal impression is that in men, as in women, the combination of emotional yearning and societal pressure to reproduce indeed crests somewhere in the 30s. There are variations depending on culture, educational level, religious affinities, geography and a litany of other factors, but identifying the decade of the 30s seems to be a reasonable range.
What I have noticed from personal experience is that the "biological clock" in women can have a very abrupt alarm. For many years, a woman might have no particular interest in reproducing, and indeed might be opposed to it... and then very suddenly, quite literally over a period of a few months, she completely reverses her view, and will not hesitate to rearrange her life in accordance with her new view. I would be surprised if corresponding changes in men are as abrupt.
Last edited by ohio_peasant; 07-26-2013 at 01:27 AM..
i really do believe we are experiencing a sea of change in how we view traditional relationships and our ideals about marriage and family. Yeah, the traditional path and model is a beautiful concept but it doesn't fit modernity. There are too many deviations, such as single parents, partners/unionships, childless/adoption, and multiculturalism.
ppl who think that unmarried/childless "friends" are left out of bbq's, hangouts, and other couples oriented activities, live in an isolated bubble. gate community mentality. nothing wrong with it at all, in fact i can completely understand. but that doesn't mean that someone who doesn't have the same lifestyle is less than normal, not happy, or not enjoying their life.
Also, as a single guy, i still find it a major drag to hang out with married couples and their kids, including my relatives. i love them very much, but play time for me is over after a couple of hours.
It's shaming language. Society says that if you don't have a Spouse, 3 kids white picket fence and a dog something is wrong with you. I think people shame men for this more then women because people see a man not doing this as him "not growing up" or "taking responsibility for his life" what whatever the hell that means lol. That's why it's different for women because we see marriage as something men make the decision on. So when a woman isn't married people generally feel sorry for her because it implies she wasnt chosen.
The concept of the traditional life and family is drastically changing though
As for "biological clock", men can have kids at any age. That's why I never understood dudes who have 3,4,5 kids all at relatively young ages(teens early 20's). I mean you has your whole damn life to have children. I got a young cousin who has 3 kids at 20 lol, come on man. Me personally I think guys should wait till they have their careers and finances relatively in check before they even think about kids. That's what the majority of my friends did who went to college. But hey, guys can do whatever they want with their lives.
If I'm going to be honest, the majority of time when a woman tells a man he's too old to have kids I just see her projecting her female problems on the man. It's like speak for yourself, YOU'RE to old to have kids. I can have them at any age stop hating
From the NY Times 8/22/12: "Experts said that the finding was hardly reason to forgo fatherhood later in life, though it might have some influence on reproductive decisions. The overall risk to a man in his 40s or older is in the range of 2 percent, at most, and there are other contributing biological factors that are entirely unknown."
TWO PERCENT!!!!
"But the study, published online in the journal Nature, provides support for the argument that the surging rate of autism diagnoses over recent decades is attributable in part to the increasing average age of fathers, which could account for as many as 20 to 30 percent of cases."
OLDER AGE CORRELATES TO 20-30 OF AUTISM CASES!!!! NOT 100% OF THE 2 PERCENT!!!
ONLY 30% OF THE 2% OF AUTISTIC NEWBORNS.... HECK THATS WAY LESS THAN 1% OF ALL AUTISTISM CASES
I WILL TAKE MY CHANCES, PLZ DO NOT SPOKE PPL JUST CUZ IT FITS YOUR SOCIAL AGENDA.
REALLY, WE WOULD HAVE KNOWN LONG LONG AGO IF MEN >50YO TEND TO FATHER CHILDREN WITH DEVELOPMENTAL/COGNITIVE/NEUROLOGICAL MEDICAL CONDITIONS. IF ANYTHING, IT IS MORE CONNECTED TO SOME MODERN LIFESTYLE/DIETARY/ENVIRONMENTAL EXPOSURE. NOT AGE.
HECK I BET THAT SOON WE WILL GET A STUDY CONFIRMING A LINK BETWEEN OBESE WOMEN AND AUTISM. ALL THAT METABOLIC WORKLOAD ON A PREGNANT WOMAN CANT BE BIOLOGICALLY ANTICIPATED, OR HEALTHY FOR THE NEWBORN WITH MOM WHO HAS JUNK FOOD HABITS. I REALLY DO BELIEVE THAT OBESITY, ALCOHOLISM, AND OTHER TOXIC LIFESTYLE CHOICES ARE PRESSING THE LIMITS OF OUR GENETIC DESIGN. HOW CAN ANY OF THOSE BAD MODERN HABITS BE BENEFICIAL FROM AN EVOLUTIONARY PERSPECTIVE?
SEX AND REPRODUCTION ARE FUNDAMENTAL HUMAN SURVIVAL FUNCTIONS. GUYS HAVE EFFECTIVE SPERM TILL VERY OLD OLD AGE, AND THEY Snip. THAT'S LIFE --LITERALLY.
modern lifestyle??
i disagree...go back to the 50, 60's, 70[s, many many mothers smoked and drank alcohol during pregnancy
ate ten times more fried foods than consumed today-
most adults smoked in the house back then around pregnant women and kids-they didnt go outside
today, when pregnant,,most all woman (ive known) , stop drinking alcohol, stop smoking (if they did) , take vitamins, and eat healthier
now, the woman doing drugs while pregnant,,,,shouldnt be a mother..
The best thing about being a man is that you can have a healthy child any time you want, whenever you hear "male biological clock" that's just female projection onto men.
The best thing about being a man is that you can have a healthy child any time you want, whenever you hear "male biological clock" that's just female projection onto men.
I guess you didn't read any of the posts about medical research proving older men have a much higher chance of producing children with learning disabilities and other medical complications.
i disagree...go back to the 50, 60's, 70[s, many many mothers smoked and drank alcohol during pregnancy
ate ten times more fried foods than consumed today-
most adults smoked in the house back then around pregnant women and kids-they didnt go outside
today, when pregnant,,most all woman (ive known) , stop drinking alcohol, stop smoking (if they did) , take vitamins, and eat healthier
now, the woman doing drugs while pregnant,,,,shouldnt be a mother..
I remember moms story of delivering my bro. in 1970. "He started to crown and I barley had time to put my cigarette out before they wheeled me into the delivery room".
Men dont have a biological clock, please stop being silly. A biological clock, simply means that at some point a woman goes through a menopause and is no longer able to have children. It has nothing to do with wanting or not wanting children. Ladies, your biological clock is ticking, whether you want kids or you dont. Men experience nothing of the sort. If it makes you feel better, yes indeed there are studies that point to older men having kids with more medical problems because their sperm is older, but it is not even close to being the same as being infertile, comparing it to womans biological clock is laughable. Stop the silliness and start using logic, please.
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