Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
I am so sorry. Shortly before my mother had to leave her home, she ended up in the hospital. Before they let her go home again, she had to be in rehabilitating facility (basically a nursing home) for about a week. We were just coming back from spending 2 weeks in D.C. taking care of my dad and we stopped by the nursing home to visit her. (This was about 3 hours from our house.) We asked her if there was anything at her house that she needed. Her answer: "There are ice cream sandwiches in the freezer." Really, Ma? Ice cream sandwiches? I didn't know whether to laugh or cry.
After losing the 3 of them, what really helped me with my grief was my house. I put all my energies into it.
Cat
You know what - that's what my husband and I have done too.
It's been a very sad three or four years. Having a series of projects has helped a lot.
This question is directed to those who are above the age of 40.
I've always been curious about what goes through the mind of an older person. Do you feel more limited at your age, do you enjoy yourselves less? Do you consistently think about all the opportunities you ruined in your younger years? Is your thought process the same as it was when you were in your 20s or 30s? Do you still feel like there's plenty of time left to accomplish more goals in your life? I just look at some older people (In their 60s and older) and some of them look so frail. I wonder to myself, does this person still enjoy their life, or do they dread waking up everyday?
I just want a heads up, to see what I should be expecting when I hit my 40s and beyond. I'm sorry if this question might sound a bit ignorant. If I offended anyone, I apologize.
This question is directed to those who are above the age of 40.
I've always been curious about what goes through the mind of an older person. Do you feel more limited at your age, do you enjoy yourselves less?
At 79 and a widower, my life is more limited but I'm enjoying my self way more than I did in my anxious, frightened and clumsy 20s and 30s.
Quote:
Do you consistently think about all the opportunities you ruined in your younger years?
No, because psychotherapy and self esteem work stopped all the self contempt and fear. I learned to STOP regretting the past and shaming my self.
Quote:
Is your thought process the same as it was when you were in your 20s or 30s?
Not at all! For one thing, I am no longer my own worst enemy and I have more realistic expectations of my self and others. I am no longer someone's FOOL.
Quote:
Do you still feel like there's plenty of time left to accomplish more goals in your life?
I don't worry about time or goals anymore and wish I had been this wise when I worried so much about goals that either never materialized or weren't so good when they finally did.
Quote:
I just look at some older people (In their 60s and older) and some of them look so frail.
I'm still pretty healthy but many folks wore them selves out or just had bad health.
Quote:
I wonder to myself, does this person still enjoy their life, or do they dread waking up everyday?
It can go either way. A healthy, happy senior will most likely love waking up and a sick or miserable one may wish it was all over.
Quote:
I just want a heads up, to see what I should be expecting when I hit my 40s and beyond.
I'd say live the best you can RIGHT NOW. Just do your best and enjoy whatever comes your way RIGHT NOW. Plan for a happy future but live as good as possible HERE & NOW!
I wasted a lot of good times worrying about the future when I could have been having a ball in the HERE & NOW. Self love and self respect will make your life worth living and BEAUTIFUL - every day.
The one thing you will definitely say to yourself is "gosh, if i knew then what i know now..."
..but don't let self contempt drag you down. You only need to move on from where you are now with SELF RESPECT and ACCEPTANCE. DON'T LOOK BACK with regret!!!!
you know who you are.... you are more confident in who you are
if you are at a funeral and want to get up and say a few words you aren't nearly as nervous or scared as in your 20's or 30's
same as at work and giving speeches..
you are older and wiser .....
when young you are usually filled with more **** and vinegar than brains......
very impatient...
when you mature you are a bit more cautious,,,,you prepare and plan better and anticipate..
as far as day to day outlook - I'm not much different than 25 or 30 I have similar ideals,,,sense of humor
its very interesting seeing my 24 yr old son ...... he is much like I was at his age.... when talking to him its like talking to a younger me..
so I can give him some great advice (that I never took)
he is a doctor but we have the same sense of humor, outlook on things politics or religion...
he is learning not to be competitive.....with his peers just because one of his peers has something does not mean he doesn't....... hes learning to be a coach not a cop.... and that giving feels better than buying something for yourself....and humility and warmth are the highest of virtues... not arrogance
I'm over 50.....I don't wear glasses, I don't take any pills my health is very good I can still bench press over 300lbs.
I look at old family photos and people in their 50's look 75-80 today...
same as the ladies many look to be in their 30's
ive learned age is an attitude more than a number....
if I were to die tomorrow I don't fear it,,,ive lived half a century.....what I do fear is being a burden on someone or wasting away on concer...someday
if we had places we could "check out" id be using that ..
age is relative I remember being 18 and 30 was old,,,,, being 30 and 40 is old, being 40 and 50 is old
now I don't think in old terms..
from 40-50 you kinda don't like birthdays...but to me,,,once you hit 50 I love them,,,i made it further than I thought!!! so I look forward to them now..
I'm a believer you make your own destiny ... I have friends that are younger....always seem to be sick trying to eat the healthiest of foods...
my dr. said he would pay for my bloodwork.....he said I have the strength of a 25-30 yr old (strong) man
he asks every visit... what my "secret" is...
its not money its not a long marriage and religion...
its treating yourself with dignity.... its like when younger....who feels sorry for a person with a hangover??? no one!! it is self induced.....if you weigh 400lbs and eat 5 hot dogs a day don't look to blame others
you know who you are.... you are more confident in who you are
if you are at a funeral and want to get up and say a few words you aren't nearly as nervous or scared as in your 20's or 30's
same as at work and giving speeches..
you are older and wiser .....
when young you are usually filled with more **** and vinegar than brains......
very impatient...
when you mature you are a bit more cautious,,,,you prepare and plan better and anticipate..
as far as day to day outlook - I'm not much different than 25 or 30 I have similar ideals,,,sense of humor
its very interesting seeing my 24 yr old son ...... he is much like I was at his age.... when talking to him its like talking to a younger me..
so I can give him some great advice (that I never took)
he is a doctor but we have the same sense of humor, outlook on things politics or religion...
he is learning not to be competitive.....with his peers just because one of his peers has something does not mean he doesn't....... hes learning to be a coach not a cop.... and that giving feels better than buying something for yourself....and humility and warmth are the highest of virtues... not arrogance
I'm over 50.....I don't wear glasses, I don't take any pills my health is very good I can still bench press over 300lbs.
I look at old family photos and people in their 50's look 75-80 today...
same as the ladies many look to be in their 30's
ive learned age is an attitude more than a number....
if I were to die tomorrow I don't fear it,,,ive lived half a century.....what I do fear is being a burden on someone or wasting away on concer...someday
if we had places we could "check out" id be using that ..
age is relative I remember being 18 and 30 was old,,,,, being 30 and 40 is old, being 40 and 50 is old
now I don't think in old terms..
from 40-50 you kinda don't like birthdays...but to me,,,once you hit 50 I love them,,,i made it further than I thought!!! so I look forward to them now..
I'm a believer you make your own destiny ... I have friends that are younger....always seem to be sick trying to eat the healthiest of foods...
my dr. said he would pay for my bloodwork.....he said I have the strength of a 25-30 yr old (strong) man
he asks every visit... what my "secret" is...
its not money its not a long marriage and religion...
its treating yourself with dignity.... its like when younger....who feels sorry for a person with a hangover??? no one!! it is self induced.....if you weigh 400lbs and eat 5 hot dogs a day don't look to blame others
Outstanding post and so so true,
I to, more than anything else, fear badly being a burden to anyone....please take me outback and shoot me, or fill up the tank Martha, we're going on a little trip....lol
everything you had said is so true, except, I still cannot get up in front of a group of people and talk or sing. never could. lol
I do not agree. At 62.5, I think over 90 is old. I just think when I am over 90, I'll be old in years, but forever young in my head!
"Feel"? What does it "feel" like to be young? Everyone is different. I know people in their 40s that seem "older" than me. They are not physically fit, huffing, puffing, medicated and complaining constantly about something. I'm thinking "You'll be pushing up daisies well before me at the rate you are going." but then, they seem so miserable anyway.
I do find "age is just number" kind of as it does go beyond that and there is no denying it. In my head, I will be "forever young"!
its not money its not a long marriage and religion...
its treating yourself with dignity....
....and if you were not raised to have an attitude of self respect, try to learn how right now and as soon as possible. Don't let the way you were brought up ruin the rest of your life!
I to, more than anything else, fear badly being a burden to anyone....please take me outback and shoot me, or fill up the tank Martha, we're going on a little trip....lol
everything you had said is so true, except, I still cannot get up in front of a group of people and talk or sing. never could. lol
enjoyed reading.
I can get up in front of a group and talk, and I have. Gave presentations to 500 people a couple of times. I learned to enjoy it.
I never would have imagined it, because when I was young I was so shy that I could barely get through a social event.
I'd never get up and sing in front a group, or even one person, because I can't carry a tune to save my life.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
At 62.5, I think over 90 is old. I just think when I am over 90, I'll be old in years, but forever young in my head!
as it does go beyond that and there is no denying it. In my head, I will be "forever young"!
Find Self respect
