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I immigrated to the US at an early age and spent the vast majority of my life here, having lived on 3 different continents. Just in the past 10 years ago, I've lost count how many addresses I've had (10-15, mostly due to changing colleges and jobs.) The longest I've ever stayed at a single address (including in my childhood) was about 1/3 of my life.
Some of my observations of myself pertaining to this (I'll try to be as unbiased as possible even though that's impossible):
- Little national/local identity. I don't really identify with the culture of my birth nation (China) or the US.
- Material things: Most people who visit my home as astonished how little "stuff" I have.. even those who make less than me. I honestly find it a huge hassle to keep lots of things around when it's likely moving day could be coming anytime soon.
- Choice of home: I tend to rent the cheapest place that I can reasonably stand to live in even if I can afford something better. Buying a home is something I don't even think about. I also tend not to invest emotionally into any new locale.
- Getting sick of waking up and seeing the same streets and buildings every single day: I kinda feel this way after living at the same address for more than a year. Moving within the same metro area (i.e. Southern California) or even to a different neighborhood in the same city cures this. (Although this excuse alone isn't enough to justify another move.) It also leads me to think that if I bought a house, I'd probably end up in a mental institution after, say, 5 years.
On a side note, I've been told moving frequently hurts credit scores despite my score in the top 10% (and it could probably be even higher if I stayed in the same place for a year or two more but that's not a tradeoff I'd consider.)
I'm curious what sort of red flags come up about someone who habitually moves more than once a year on average and has done so for the vast majority of their adult life and doesn't have any other glaring issues (i.e. criminal record, drug abuse, etc.)
Nope disagree completely, despite living and loving where I’ve lived these past 41 years in various states I still have a strong identity and grounding. I haven’t seen that disappear with my many international friends or family either.
We have bought homes ,bought things, sold homes and sold things.
Sorry but I don’t see red flags, some people move a lot due to career options, military etc, and some people are nomads. We have lived in two countries and 5 states and each place we have invested our time within the community politically and with volunteering.
You can’t really compare or judge others based on your personality and need to roam. You are a nomad and there is nothing wrong with that.
I've been a bit of a rolling stone for the better part of the last ten years or so.
I moved from Tennessee to Iowa back in 2012. I was tired of commuting fifty miles one way for $15/hr job. That was my first move away from my hometown on my own, and I moved back. Ultimately, I should have never gone, but once I left, I should have stayed until I found something better elsewhere.
I moved back to Tennessee and lost my butt in 2013. I ended up going from $22/hr in Iowa to half that back here with no benefits. I moved again in 2014 for purely financial reasons - I couldn't survive on $11/hr!
I lived in Indianapolis for about three years, was about to lose my job, and found something that paid about the same in my hometown. I'll be back here for nearly two years soon. My job and company do not exactly feel stable right now. I'm looking to move to a more vibrant, larger region, but there's no sense of extreme urgency.
At 32, the thing I regret most is that I've never really been able to live anywhere I've wanted to live. It's all been about where I can find work.
I've been a bit of a rolling stone for the better part of the last ten years or so.
I moved from Tennessee to Iowa back in 2012. I was tired of commuting fifty miles one way for $15/hr job. That was my first move away from my hometown on my own, and I moved back. Ultimately, I should have never gone, but once I left, I should have stayed until I found something better elsewhere.
I moved back to Tennessee and lost my butt in 2013. I ended up going from $22/hr in Iowa to half that back here with no benefits. I moved again in 2014 for purely financial reasons - I couldn't survive on $11/hr!
I lived in Indianapolis for about three years, was about to lose my job, and found something that paid about the same in my hometown. I'll be back here for nearly two years soon. My job and company do not exactly feel stable right now. I'm looking to move to a more vibrant, larger region, but there's no sense of extreme urgency.
At 32, the thing I regret most is that I've never really been able to live anywhere I've wanted to live. It's all been about where I can find work.
I lived in Charlotte NC for three years from 2009-2012 and loved it. Those were the best years of my life. I moved back to Oklahoma City in 2012, which I despise but it's where my family is. There is an old saying that "you can never go home again." These past six years of my life have really been quite miserable. I don't think I can ever be happy living in a place like Oklahoma City. Unfortunately at 32 it's a lot more difficult to just up and move than it was at 23. At this point I would pretty much have to do something drastic and reckless if I wanted to leave. But gosh, I miss living in a place that I could at least tolerate let alone actually be happy.
I have been wondering about this too. We just finished the book, Forgotten God by Francis Chan. Unfortunately, my understanding of the Holy Spirit was not increased by this book. I have done some research on Francis Chan, though. He had a childhood disrupted by the repeated deaths of caretakers, which resulted in multiple moves to different families. While he has a successful marriage, he seems to have internalized this constant disruption. God is always calling him to uproot and do something else. Further, he seems to think that God is calling upon the rest of us to uproot our own lives.
Perhaps God is telling us instead to settle down and work hard at our jobs so that we can take care of ourselves and our families. I want stability in my own life and in my church, but I see no support from Francis Chan in this belief.
I lived in Charlotte NC for three years from 2009-2012 and loved it. Those were the best years of my life. I moved back to Oklahoma City in 2012, which I despise but it's where my family is. There is an old saying that "you can never go home again." These past six years of my life have really been quite miserable. I don't think I can ever be happy living in a place like Oklahoma City. Unfortunately at 32 it's a lot more difficult to just up and move than it was at 23. At this point I would pretty much have to do something drastic and reckless if I wanted to leave. But gosh, I miss living in a place that I could at least tolerate let alone actually be happy.
I'm about three hours from Charlotte. I have some personal things outstanding where I am now. I have some stuff happening over the next few months, and my girlfriend has some medical issues, which make relocating impractical now. Still, Charlotte and Nashville (along with some smaller metros) are on my short list over the next year to eighteen months.
I live in a much smaller metro than you do. I don't hate it, but the outdoor opportunities are the best thing about the place. Other than that, it's a small metro of about 200,000 isolated from other metros. There just isn't much going on, and the job market/opportunity here is just not very good.
I just don't understand the mindset of people who want to spend their lives in one place. Virtually no one in my immediate family has lived more than fifty miles from our hometown. I find it mind-boggling.
I'm about three hours from Charlotte. I have some personal things outstanding where I am now. I have some stuff happening over the next few months, and my girlfriend has some medical issues, which make relocating impractical now. Still, Charlotte and Nashville (along with some smaller metros) are on my short list over the next year to eighteen months.
I live in a much smaller metro than you do. I don't hate it, but the outdoor opportunities are the best thing about the place. Other than that, it's a small metro of about 200,000 isolated from other metros. There just isn't much going on, and the job market/opportunity here is just not very good.
I just don't understand the mindset of people who want to spend their lives in one place. Virtually no one in my immediate family has lived more than fifty miles from our hometown. I find it mind-boggling.
I find for me personally, when it comes to smaller metro areas, nearby outdoor recreation and natural amenities are a must. It also helps if the politics are somewhat progressive, which can be hit or miss with smaller metro areas. I lived in Little Rock for about a year and a half and while there was a lot I didn't like about the city itself, the geography and somewhat progressive culture in the city itself helped make it tolerable. I prefer Little Rock over OKC for these reasons, though I loved Charlotte wayyy more than either of them. I think Charlotte is great because not only is it the perfect size (not too small but not overwhelmingly large) and is near almost any kind of outdoor recreation you could want. Nashville is similar, but farther from the beach.
I agree with you on people who spend their entire lives in one place. Moving is very difficult but I think it's something everyone should experience.
The internal readiness to move keeps in check your material possessions. You stop and think before buying any bulky item: "What happens if we need to move? Is it valuable enough to be moved with us? Or, can we do without?"
Quote:
How important is the stuff in your life?
Your material possessions—those things you’ve worked so hard for by slaving 40, 50, 60 hours a week to acquire—how much value do they actually add to your life?
We bet it’s less than you realize.
Here’s an exercise for you. Take a moment and write down your ten most expensive material possessions from the last decade. Things like your car, your house, your jewelry, your furniture, and any other material possessions you own or have owned in the last ten years. The big ticket items.
Next to that list, make another top ten list: ten things that add the most value to your life. This list might include experiences like catching a sunset with a loved one, watching your kid play baseball, eating dinner with your parents, etc.
Be honest with yourself when you’re making these lists: it’s likely that both lists share zero things in common.
There's nothing wrong with wandering souls and gypsy hearts. They may even have something that others lack. Maybe they also enjoy expressing freedom more than most.
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