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Old 12-09-2013, 09:05 AM
 
428 posts, read 397,909 times
Reputation: 105

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Couldn't believe they moved my topic in this area. I am not mad for god sake
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Old 12-09-2013, 09:23 AM
 
Location: Somewhere
8,070 posts, read 5,869,355 times
Reputation: 5654
Quote:
Originally Posted by princewilla View Post
I have no desire to be with a woman. Kids or no kids . Can a vacetomy reduce feelings towards opposite gender ?
And briffualts law says the same thing for women who don't want kids.So it doens't matter.
Any other advices?
Your thoughts are all over the place

You said you have no desire for women (I guess you mean you don't think being with a woman is beneficial to you not that your body is not attracted to women) and the reason you stated was that you think (based on experiences and a documentary) that women only desire men in their lives when their they need help raising their babies

So how do you explain childless couples? Why do so many women(who are financially stable) stay in marriages where kids are out of the question because the children either grew up and left, the woman could not have kids or the woman decided not to have kids?

Maybe your problem is deeper than that, you just hate women and your feelings are clouding your rationality. If you feel hatred for women I think you should seek help because you need to learn to deal with these conflicted feelings., otherwise you are sounded like the type who will seek women( because your body says so and you feel you can't control your urges) but mistreat them or abuse them because you just hate them and hate that they make you feel attracted to them.
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Old 12-09-2013, 10:02 AM
 
19,059 posts, read 23,022,296 times
Reputation: 13455
Quote:
Originally Posted by Sugah Ray View Post
Your thoughts are all over the place

You said you have no desire for women (I guess you mean you don't think being with a woman is beneficial to you not that your body is not attracted to women) and the reason you stated was that you think (based on experiences and a documentary) that women only desire men in their lives when their they need help raising their babies

So how do you explain childless couples? Why do so many women(who are financially stable) stay in marriages where kids are out of the question because the children either grew up and left, the woman could not have kids or the woman decided not to have kids?

Maybe your problem is deeper than that, you just hate women and your feelings are clouding your rationality. If you feel hatred for women I think you should seek help because you need to learn to deal with these conflicted feelings., otherwise you are sounded like the type who will seek women( because your body says so and you feel you can't control your urges) but mistreat them or abuse them because you just hate them and hate that they make you feel attracted to them.
Sound advice. I hope he listens to you.
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Old 12-09-2013, 10:03 AM
 
Location: Europe
2,730 posts, read 2,279,370 times
Reputation: 4194
Quote:
Originally Posted by princewilla View Post
Its so Fairy tale like. You do know that marriage and love is not fairy tale, right ?
Why we are so influenced by romantic stories even though they are not real ?
You know, me and my husband are only 2 people in this world who can define our marriage. If we want it to be a fairy tale it is!!!!!

And we are not only one , one of our friend-couples lives as lord of the rings, they even made some buildings to their back yard

If you don't want it to be, then don't.

If you want it to be, it is
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Old 12-09-2013, 11:01 AM
 
428 posts, read 397,909 times
Reputation: 105
Quote:
Originally Posted by Sugah Ray View Post
Your thoughts are all over the place

You said you have no desire for women (I guess you mean you don't think being with a woman is beneficial to you not that your body is not attracted to women) and the reason you stated was that you think (based on experiences and a documentary) that women only desire men in their lives when their they need help raising their babies

So how do you explain childless couples? Why do so many women(who are financially stable) stay in marriages where kids are out of the question because the children either grew up and left, the woman could not have kids or the woman decided not to have kids?

Maybe your problem is deeper than that, you just hate women and your feelings are clouding your rationality. If you feel hatred for women I think you should seek help because you need to learn to deal with these conflicted feelings., otherwise you are sounded like the type who will seek women( because your body says so and you feel you can't control your urges) but mistreat them or abuse them because you just hate them and hate that they make you feel attracted to them.
I would be honest with you here.
I have never hated women in my life. Never even had negative feelings towards them, I mean NEVER. The reason I don't watch porn because I feel bad for those women who are in it. I have never seek pleasure from it. It was just not me.
Same way, I never chased women in my life. Nor I ever had desire to use them for sex or anything.
You talked about abuse here but how could I ever do that if I feel so uncomfortable in front of women and always try to ignore them ?
I think you are just speculating things.
I can easily live without sex because I don't view women as sexual objects or beings. I see them like my sisters or for the lack of better word " just different creatures "

I asked it here for advices so that i can curb my attraction and desires. Not because I want to seek love or anything but because I can live happily( not that I am not these days) but without any second thought in my Mind later.

I think I come of as wrong but no, it just not the way things work in my world
Meanwhile, thank you so much for your valuable response .
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Old 12-09-2013, 11:07 AM
 
Location: 60015
278 posts, read 374,972 times
Reputation: 131
Quote:
Originally Posted by Tatooine View Post
Have a friend taser you every time you look at pretty girl. Pretty soon your body will realize that any feelings for women --> pain --> no feelings, eventually.
While this is quite hiliarious, the concept will work. If your brain is taught to associate pain with feelings for a woman, you will avoid feeling for women. But there's a serious caveat--it is part of the human 'condition' to want to be attracted to the opposite sex. Trying to break this instinct is going to be like trying to not be hungry--it will have severe consequences--even moreso than the damage that women can cause to a man.

You can probably rid yourself of feelings for women since they are not physiological as much as psychological. But the damage to your psyche would be detrimental. Healthy males around the world have feelings for women (or a feminine man, in the case of homosexual relationships).
Quote:
Originally Posted by CSD610 View Post
...just do not blame anyone but yourself in 5, 10, 20, 30 years when you are not happy, alone, lonely, and miserable because you have no one special in your life...
This is utter garbage. Someone can be completely content and happy with life in a sustainable way without a single 'special' individual in their life. If I didn't meet my wife, I would have been single for the rest of my life, and pretty happy too. I was 38 before I got married, so you never know when and where the 'right' type of person will come.
Quote:
Originally Posted by princewilla View Post
You do not need to be loved, not at the cost of yourself. The single relationship that is truly central and crucial in a life is the relationship to the self. Of all the people you will know in a lifetime, you are the only one you will never lose
These are some of the wisest words I've ever heard from someone in your age group. This is a VERY important concept. Never let your 'self' be damaged by other relationships, women or otherwise.
Quote:
Originally Posted by princewilla View Post
...but can a broken heart ever truely heal ?
It can heal, but like a broken bone without setting, it heals back differently than it originally was.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Rakin View Post
How to deal with feelings ? Deal with them like the rest of us in a mature adult way.

Get over it.
That's the most immature way to resolve issues. It's also the most ineffective as issues are like water and will find their way out of your being in other more unhealthy way unless dealt with properly. People who advocate 'get over it' are usually plagued with all sorts of minor issues that affect their day-to-day life as baggage.
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Old 12-09-2013, 11:07 AM
 
428 posts, read 397,909 times
Reputation: 105
Quote:
Originally Posted by Braunwyn View Post
Sound advice. I hope he listens to you.
Things are under control miss.
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Old 12-09-2013, 11:10 AM
 
428 posts, read 397,909 times
Reputation: 105
Quote:
Originally Posted by soUlwounD View Post
You know, me and my husband are only 2 people in this world who can define our marriage. If we want it to be a fairy tale it is!!!!!

And we are not only one , one of our friend-couples lives as lord of the rings, they even made some buildings to their back yard

If you don't want it to be, then don't.

If you want it to be, it is
I would prefer Harry potter type of fantasy though. I love wizards..
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Old 12-09-2013, 11:19 AM
 
428 posts, read 397,909 times
Reputation: 105
Quote:
Originally Posted by SamirD View Post
While this is quite hiliarious, the concept will work. If your brain is taught to associate pain with feelings for a woman, you will avoid feeling for women. But there's a serious caveat--it is part of the human 'condition' to want to be attracted to the opposite sex. Trying to break this instinct is going to be like trying to not be hungry--it will have severe consequences--even moreso than the damage that women can cause to a man.

You can probably rid yourself of feelings for women since they are not physiological as much as psychological. But the damage to your psyche would be detrimental. Healthy males around the world have feelings for women (or a feminine man, in the case of homosexual relationships).
This is utter garbage. Someone can be completely content and happy with life in a sustainable way without a single 'special' individual in their life. If I didn't meet my wife, I would have been single for the rest of my life, and pretty happy too. I was 38 before I got married, so you never know when and where the 'right' type of person will come.
These are some of the wisest words I've ever heard from someone in your age group. This is a VERY important concept. Never let your 'self' be damaged by other relationships, women or otherwise.
It can heal, but like a broken bone without setting, it heals back differently than it originally was.
That's the most immature way to resolve issues. It's also the most ineffective as issues are like water and will find their way out of your being in other more unhealthy way unless dealt with properly. People who advocate 'get over it' are usually plagued with all sorts of minor issues that affect their day-to-day life as baggage.
Your post just touched my heart. Thanks for some great views.
I am like an explorer. In free time, I turn on my GPS and go for tracking or just explore new areas. It my way of living.
Things which bothers me the most is my friends constant accusation of me being Gay or weird because I choose not to watch porn with them or tend to ignore girls.
And I am kind of fed up of explaning this to everyone EVERYDAY.
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Old 12-09-2013, 11:22 AM
 
428 posts, read 397,909 times
Reputation: 105
Quote:
Originally Posted by Amy1190 View Post
You're also at a difficult age. Why do something now that you may potentially regret at 30 or older?
Who gurantee that I would live that long ?
Who knows how much hours I even have to live ?
I don't think about future because it may or may not exist.
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