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Have you ever personally know anyone who successfully committed suicide? How did you feel about it, and did it affect your life in any way?
I think the only one I've known was one of my high school teachers. I believe it was about domestic issues. I was pretty young at the time, but I don't think I thought a lot about it.
Oddly, there have been four suicide deaths among the 49 boys who were in my graduating class from high school, which is a pretty staggering statistic (8%). But none of those were anyone whom I had ever seen after graduation, so I can't say I knew them. None of them were the kind of kids in school that anyone would ever point a finger at, about their character or personality.
Honestly, I've yet to know anyone personally who had committed suicide. In fact, outside of a few older relatives that have passed away like my dad. I did know this kid I graduated high school with was shot and killed. I was just an acquaintance though but I did feel sad after hearing about it. Not an overbearing sadness like I would have felt if we had a more personal relationship but I thought about how hard it was on his big brother who I also went to high school with.
Friend of mine. Would have never saw it coming, he was one of the most liked guys, threw great parties had a hot girlfriend. I didn't know a single person who didn't like him. Apparently he was depressed and was found hanging in his garage one day.
Was really an eye opener, it happens to people you just would never expect.
My cousin. He had remarried fairly recently to a woman he had gone to high school with. He seemed very happy. He shot himself in the head in his sister's driveway.
My paternal grandmother committed suicide, a favorite teacher I had also did, I had a good friend that did, and my youngest brother committed suicide when he was like 31. They all affected me. I knew all these people had challenges (who doesn't) of one kind or another in their lives, but didn't expect them to take their own lives.
I've known two people who have committed suicide, a lady friend of my moms when I was about 12 years old and a bipolar guy I used to talk to sometimes at a local bar.
In both cases my first reaction was I blamed myself. "If I had only done this or that, then it would not have happened!"
Then talking with other people who knew the bipolar guy, they also blamed themselves. I learned that is a common reaction of anyone who knows someone who commits suicide - they blame themselves. But of course it is not anyone's fault. The person would have done it anyway.
In the case of the bipolar guy, I DO BLAME his bank partly. They sent him a Visa "debit card" which was attached to his checking account. He was on social security and also did not understand financial matters very well. He thought it was a credit card and that he could go out and "charge it up"! Well I think he did just that and then that cleaned out his limited checking account - then he couldn't pay his rent [which was maybe $100 on section 8 subsidized housing].
I know another person who is borderline developmentally disabled. He kept overdrawing his checking account for amounts like $20 when there was no money in the account, then the bank charged him $80 in fees each time. I asked the bank if they could give him a special account which would not allow him to take money out if there was not any in the account - they said no! (Hog wash!) He did not commit suicide - just an example.
Anyway if you know someone who commits suicide and you start blaming yourself, keep in mind everyone else who knew the person is doing the same thing. And it is not your fault.
Last edited by Billy_J; 02-23-2014 at 08:21 AM..
02-23-2014, 01:29 PM
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My mom's friend when I was a kid. I didn't understand it, I asked why.
My gf's best friend in college.
And personally, I've been suicidal. Almost od'ed, should've had my stomach pumped.
Yep, my father allegedly did when I was very young. It did affect me a lot especially since I didn't get therapy for it.
Also, it used to be horrible in school when we were supposed to make presents for father's day or when we were supposed to talk about what our parents did for a living.
I used to wonder if "it" would happen to me too since my father did it. Quite ridiculous actually, but that's how kids think I guess.
I have had two co-workers in two different jobs who committed suicide. Each was in his mid-30s in age. I got along with both of them and enjoyed working with them, but I wasn't close to either of them. In both cases, I was stunned and very sad, as they were quality people and I had no idea they were hurting so much inside.
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