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Young guys have been buzzing their hair down to the scalp or shaving it off for at least two decades. I went bald in my twenties......just get out the clippers, bzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.
I started balding in my 20s as well, but I didn't care. The only people who are really going to hold it against you are a handful of ugly women and guys like yourself who feel like it's the end of the world.
My gf is hot, I have pretty much everything I want, and I'm happy. As hard as it is to believe in your narcissistic 20s, you don't need validation from absolutely every other human being on the planet and your biggest obstacle in this very very socially acceptable genetic condition is going to be yourself.
Get over yourself, learn to relax, find a style that works for you and it's all going to be fine.
Last edited by Spatula City; 10-09-2014 at 05:19 AM..
Uhm.. I am dealing with the exact same problem and through all the anxiety and stress I am balding in my early 20s and I am a female. I am becoming extremely self conscious and i was reading your message and almost cried.. I felt like you were writing my diary. I felt like death was coming at me every time I closed my eyes and I lost all my trust and faith in myself. I questioned my ability for everything and I felt like i understood everything about life which was so meaningless. I was trying so hard to relax and that drove me crazy. I felt uneasy whatever I do and it's a fight that doesn't stop. It's my mentality but I just don't know how to let go of my consciousness and I am ****ing tired now but can't get sleep. I Worked out today but I felt great when I worked out but now that I am home again i am haunted again
Quote:
Originally Posted by HarryManback
Here is how early balding has rendered my psychological state:
I feel like I have an expiration date that is nearing, like a time pressure to live life while I still can
I feel like I'm living a lie, like I'm a fraud, because of how no one in real life notices my receded hairline due to the carefully cultivated styles that I wear to conceal it
I feel like I'm having my prime years robbed from me
I feel like I've made enemies are bright lights, wind, rain. I avoid pool parties. I hate certain mirrors. I hate looking at myself in general.
I am extremely camera shy. I set my Facebook settings so that I have to approve pictures that people tag me in. If someone tags me in a picture, the number 1 thing I look at is whether my hair looks okay
I have trouble talking to people face-to-face because I always end up staring at their hairline on accident. Throughout the day, I look at hairlines all around me to try and gather data.
I secretly fantasize about every other guy in the world losing their hair so they are brought down to my level.
I have hair loss-related nightmares almost every night.
I have started to develop an irrational anger at hair loss research for not finding a viable treatment yet.
I rarely leave the house.
I am severely depressed. I have not crossed into suicidal territory yet, but sometimes I think that I wouldn't mind if I died in a car wreck the next day.
I am paranoid that maybe there's a girl who used to like me and then she'll see me as a bald guy and think "What happened???"
I am paranoid that I might become the butt of jokes and ridicule
I feel like my identity would be compromised if I became a bald guy. I don't believe I could live that way. By the way, I'd be a short, bald guy -- the ultimate genetic trash.
I look at pictures of myself from 2 years ago, when I had perfect hair, and I get this sinking feeling in my stomach.
seriously SHUT UP , SHUT UP and SHUT UP FOR GODS SAKE. "Accept baldness, you can't do anything". "you look good in bald look and you would definitely get girlfriends"... for god's sake stop,stop all this stupid nonsensical talking. This is like saying " you would loose your eyesight by 25 and accept the reality , there is nothing you can do about it,, girls would anyway like you like that" ..... so many, oh my god so many forums with soooo many people posting these nonsensical comments. What kind of people are these, trust me they honestly don't care much about the problem. Is most of the humanity such weak spirited.
plz guys, we got a problem and we need to FIGHT. This problem is no small, we are loosing our looks, our identity. Don't you ever give a dime about you loosing your identity day by day. For god's sake we have a problem and we need to fight. Start thinking and work collectively.
start by the traditional rogaine, finasteride... if you a big patch, try out wig in public places and applying medicines at night. Each treatment type would last for 6 months. Try all possibilites existing: US english medicines (Rogaine)-> chinese herbs-> indian ayurveda-> hair massage exercises -> homeopathy -> brazilian (amazon) forest medicines , there would be something ... something that would work, continue you fight wearing wig in daytime and applying medicines at night. It doesn't matter much how artificial the wig looks , honestly if won't look artificial until very close.
I don't care about the girl angle, to me if I am balding at a young age, I DO NOT WANT MY CHILDREN to suffer my fate, no never,
I am willing to work hard to save money for hair transplant as my first investment for future instead of some fancy car or house or vacation trip.
This ****ing problem is like a cancer of identity. do you get it.... start somewhere
I commit that every year until my death I would contribute 3k$ to trichology research, I want this problem to end once and for all with my generation.
I will work collectively with people and combine efforts on things that works. I am an Indian suffering from plaque psoriasis and probably balding because of that. I am following indian ayurveda where I apply indian bhajarang oil and that seems to increasing density for me. Now I don't want the people following the post to be doing the same thing, please volunteer to try something different and periodically report progress. Has anyone tried chinese medicines, korean concoctions, brazilian plant based lotions. Lets start a new thread and report... start fighting guys for heavens sake...
Don't listen to all these optimist facading muppets, you have every right to feel the way you do. I'm in the exact same boat as you brother (20's going bald fast). People will never truly understand you its an immense pain to lose something you've had your entire life which is directly connected with your identity and future mating success (one of our most important primal instincts). Girls are especially hypocritical about it, they'll tell you it doesn't matter but dont date bald guys. I don't listen to what girls say on the issue because they are flat out liars. I feel your pain man, worst thing in the world. I wanna die sometimes too. I hope you find peace or i hope you don't go extremely bald so a hair transplant can give you your hair back. God knows hes not giving your hair back to you, hopefully a surgeon can.
The #1 thing is to live for yourself and not be so preoccupied with what others thinks about you. Your baldness is a flaw, but you're letting it define you, which it should not do. You sound really worried about girls; your hair takes you down a level, but being a ***** about it will turn off any girl.
The imagined problems that guys have with baldness and the associated lack of self-esteem that goes along with this are way worse in terms of being not attractive to women than is the actual baldness.
What are most women attracted to when they first meet you? Mostly looks.
What are most women attracted to after they have talked to you for 15 or 20 minutes? Mostly kindness, intelligence, self-assurance, social intelligence, and humor. The hottest guy can kill a woman's initial attraction very quickly if he lacks these attributes.
The imagined problems that guys have with baldness and the associated lack of self-esteem that goes along with this are way worse in terms of being not attractive to women than is the actual baldness.
What are most women attracted to when they first meet you? Mostly looks.
What are most women attracted to after they have talked to you for 15 or 20 minutes? Mostly kindness, intelligence, self-assurance, social intelligence, and humor. The hottest guy can kill a woman's initial attraction very quickly if he lacks these attributes.
Spot on.
I haven't slogged through this whole necro-thread but in case it hasn't been mentioned, Patrick Stewart (Shakespearian actor and had the role of Captain Picard on Star Trek: Next Generation) went bald in his 20s, though it was the end of the world, and ended up on the cover of some magazine declaring him the sexiest man alive. Realized both people's perceptions and his own perceptions of their perceptions, were all BS. Moved on.
Of course people have a right to feel what they feel, but they also have the ability to correct their thinking and focus on what they have rather than what they don't have -- and thus change how they feel.
I have a monk's cap myself, it materialized in my late 40s. Probably helps that I can't easily see it, but it has had zero impact on my social life or attractiveness to women, etc. And while it is less outside most people's expectations to start balding in one's 40s or 50s, it's just as much a motivation for men to do stupid things to try to fix it, conceal it, or compensate for it. Think of Trump's elaborate comb-over, which, like all comb-overs, just draws attention to the problem way more than doing nothing, and screams "I'm insecure about a superficial thing like how much hair I have". Think about wigs, which virtually always look like wigs rather than real hair.
Male pattern baldness is not a death sentence, cancer, profound disability, etc. And, as the post I'm replying to points out, it's got nothing to do with character or virtue. It isn't even ugliness. It need not be consequential, unless you decide to believe that it is. People who reject you over it (which could happen, I suppose, if you're still young, because most of your friends are still immature and superficial) are people you shouldn't trust or seek out anyway.
Also: it's probably easier to attribute how people treat you to some unalterable fact of your appearance rather than to your need to improve how you relate to others.
I remember a guy who was half bald at age 16 in high school(I graduated in 1967, almost 50 years ago). He was a local football start, so everyone knew him. Because of that he couldn't buy liquor underage in his local town, but two towns over nobody knew him and he was never carded and could buy whatever he wanted since he was so elderly looking. He loved it, and so did the girls who wanted to be "out with an older guy".
Unfortunately, he never made it into his actual 60's and died fairly young.
The imagined problems that guys have with baldness and the associated lack of self-esteem that goes along with this are way worse in terms of being not attractive to women than is the actual baldness.
What are most women attracted to when they first meet you? Mostly looks.
What are most women attracted to after they have talked to you for 15 or 20 minutes? Mostly kindness, intelligence, self-assurance, social intelligence, and humor. The hottest guy can kill a woman's initial attraction very quickly if he lacks these attributes.
Yes, yes, yes.
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I was wondering if you are okay.
