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I don't understand why people tell you to be humble, to have humility, but then once you do, someone else is stealing the spotlight and walking away with what should have been your winnings. I have seen this time and time again. The ones who are nice, humble, and self-effacing may be well-liked, but they get forgotten and looked over, while the ones who put their pride out there unabashedly are the ones who succeed.
I used to be very self-sacrificing, and everybody loved me, but I was miserable because I wouldn't let myself stand on my own two feet. I was always putting everyone else ahead of me, and remaining stagnant and unfulfilled in my own life.
Today, I am not shy anymore about saying, YES, I am a happy person, I'm working towards my goals and I'm not going to shrink myself because you're uncomfortable with it. I also have people skills and I have tact - but I don't hide for other people's sake anymore. Why? Because I don't trust that anyone but me really has my well-being at heart.
This is how people become selfish - because they trust others to look out for them and get burned too many times.
You can still attain your goals and still put your own ambitions first, and when you strive to achieve something and then achieve it, that is the time to be humble. I personally like people who do not broadcast their accomplishments for all to see, and have learned that when you have to do some digging on people to find out what they've been successful at, those people are far more worthy of respect.
One is better to let respect come to you by your own actions than to go chasing it. You definitely have the right idea though, and I agree with you.
Humility is a deep subject with many layers and facets to view it from...as is forgiveness, for example.
One veiw is from the inside looking out and another is from the outside looking in.
The one that counts is from the inside.
Who are we being humble to? God? Our Boss, a co-worker...a grateful person, a taker?
You mention self- sacrifice...that is not to be confused with humility...that is self sacrifice...it
also, has many layers.
I know that a person on a stage teaching, successful, wealthy, confident can be the humblest
person in the hall. Yet, others view him as arrogant, prideful, or self-righteous, even boastful.
Be confident and clear on who you are, I say...you will automatically know who to humble yourself
before..who to serve...who to show gratitude to...to be generous with.
Being a doormat for people is not humility.,either...it usually means enabling them to take advantage of you.
Recognizing the power we have inside of ourselves, actually comes from deep humility, first.
Personally, I feel humility to the Giver of my life.
I show respect, kindness, gratitude and charity to others...I sacrifice nothing really..
what appears as an object I sacrifice is actually a 'gain' for me.
Humility is a deep subject with many layers and facets to view it from...as is forgiveness, for example.
One veiw is from the inside looking out and another is from the outside looking in.
The one that counts is from the inside.
Who are we being humble to? God? Our Boss, a co-worker...a grateful person, a taker?
You mention self- sacrifice...that is not to be confused with humility...that is self sacrifice...it
also, has many layers.
I know that a person on a stage teaching, successful, wealthy, confident can be the humblest
person in the hall. Yet, others view him as arrogant, prideful, or self-righteous, even boastful.
Be confident and clear on who you are, I say...you will automatically know who to humble yourself
before..who to serve...who to show gratitude to...to be generous with.
Being a doormat for people is not humility.,either...it usually means enabling them to take advantage of you.
Recognizing the power we have inside of ourselves, actually comes from deep humility, first.
Personally, I feel humility to the Giver of my life.
I show respect, kindness, gratitude and charity to others...I sacrifice nothing really..
what appears as an object I sacrifice is actually a 'gain' for me.
See? It's got so much about it, this humility.
I agree with this. I do not think of humility as being a people-pleaser or doormat, but more about gratitude - realizing you've been blessed with good things in life, that you didn't create it all yourself but a higher power and even other people like family helped - and that people who have less don't deserve less because they are lesser people, or more like we don't necessarily deserve more than other people, we've been lucky to a degree.
It's not selfish for me to live my life to please me. It's selfish for me to expect you to live your life to please me.
It's my understanding that humility is merely seeing myself and my place in the universe in the proper light. I can also do well to realize that we are all connected and that we all matter.
What matters to me is that *I* know I am good at doing something. Or the *I* know I won something fair and square (no cheating). Or that *I* know I have done well financially and have my needs taken care of - that I am good at taking care of those sorts of things...
BUT it does not matter if other people know that or not. Actually I would prefer they don't know in many cases. Other people are not so fortunate. They don't like to be reminded of their failures by someone else who blabs all about his successes.
Rather other people like to feel like they are successful. That makes them feel good about themselves. So rather than going around and telling others how successful *I* am, I instead point out good things other people are doing. I point out and congratulate them on their successes. Then they feel good - I in-turn feel good to be around happy people!
I used to go the typical correct person but I am tired of this for the same reason as you.
Nowadays I am humble with people who deserve it, and people who acts natural with me, with all those wonderful-awesome-perfect- arrogant people I act like the kind of person they wouldn't like to meet, as someone who is even better.
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