Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
So, if you are an adult only child, with hardly any relatives, are you happy or sad about your familial situation?
I fall into your category and it was never an issue growing up, and still isn't.
It wasn't until relatives or other people put that thought into my head, that I even considered it.
Let them live their life and be happy for what they do have. Don't be the person that plants that seed of regret or envy in their minds. Your grandchild does not need to grow up learning to envy what other families or kids have or do, because his grandparents taught him that. He needs to learn how to bloom where he is planted and live with gratitude for what he has.
I never wanted a sibling. Not ever. I was fine playing by myself (and still am.)
But i grew up with my mother's entire dysfunctional family and they are all evil and entitles SOBs. So now that i'm older, i am ESPECIALLY happy there arent more of them.
I have a grandson who is 2 years old, and his parents don't plan on having any other kids. He doesn't even have cousins anywhere near his age, just a couple who are much older. Neither families have many relatives, and none who are close, distance wise or emotionally. I was wondering if someone else is in this situation? If so, were you lonely as a child, not having any siblings to share your lives joys, ups and downs, holidays, with, or were you OK with it? What about as you got older, in your teens and older? I worry that he won't have any contact with anyone related to him when he's older, no family to speak of.
Until recently, I practically pleaded with my daughter to have another child because I am so worried about this, and because both of us grandmothers would love for them to have another one. Hopefully, a girl, but it really wouldn't matter, I would rest easier knowing my grandson had family close to him later. I know, something could happen to one of them, and the other would still be alone. Anyway, I quit talking to her about it because I'm more concerned now about the state of our country. From what I read and hear on the news, the future doesn't look good for our young children. I'm concerned about the world they will be growing up in.
So, if you are an adult only child, with hardly any relatives, are you happy or sad about your familial situation?
I am an only child and lived in the country--my mom took me to kids activities at the library and dance class what what not but didn't really have a friend or anyone to play with until I was in school--never noticed.
My mom is also an only child and my dad only had 1 brother that lived to adulthood--he had two children one 7 years old and one 15 years older than me--both are married with no children. It's a pretty empty family tree but maybe it's petering out for a reason! LOL
My father is deceased and my mother is paralyzed so I do now think to myself that if something happened to my husband I wouldn't have anything--any really close living relative etc--which is weird--but doesn't really make me sad--just makes me think.
I never was around kids though and I wonder if that is why I am not sure if I want any? just not being used to it or being around people other than adults?
On the other hand I have been POA for 3 adults (two of which are deceased) before the age of 30--so I have definitely don't my share of family caregiving.
Growing up until about 6, we lived in Arcola Virginia. You know where that is? Literally in the middle of no where. I learned to read and develop my vocabulary from the Washington Post.
Arcola is 30 miles or so south of Fairfax Virginia right out side of DC.
My being an only gave me a survival instinct that many people don't have. I say that because one of my friends from high school lost his father right about the same time I lost mine. He fell apart and his life even 25 years later is crap. He still blames the loss of his father. He came from a large Irish family.
Did my fathers death effect me, oh hell yea. I fell apart for a month or so. But I went through it on my own and my own terms. Coming out of it stronger, not knowing I had brother so and so or sister so and so to pick me up.
Not only was I an only, but my parents were 40 when I was born in 1963. That was almost un heard of back then. So I had parents that were older and more mature and stable than many people.
My upbringing, being an only from mature parents was one of the best things that happened to me.
I have a grandson who is 2 years old, and his parents don't plan on having any other kids. He doesn't even have cousins anywhere near his age, just a couple who are much older. Neither families have many relatives, and none who are close, distance wise or emotionally. I was wondering if someone else is in this situation? If so, were you lonely as a child, not having any siblings to share your lives joys, ups and downs, holidays, with, or were you OK with it? What about as you got older, in your teens and older? I worry that he won't have any contact with anyone related to him when he's older, no family to speak of.
Until recently, I practically pleaded with my daughter to have another child because I am so worried about this, and because both of us grandmothers would love for them to have another one.Hopefully, a girl, but it really wouldn't matter, I would rest easier knowing my grandson had family close to him later. I know, something could happen to one of them, and the other would still be alone. Anyway, I quit talking to her about it because I'm more concerned now about the state of our country. From what I read and hear on the news, the future doesn't look good for our young children. I'm concerned about the world they will be growing up in.
So, if you are an adult only child, with hardly any relatives, are you happy or sad about your familial situation?
You absolutely, positively need to stop talking to you daughter about this. She's a married adult with a 2-year-old and is perfectly capable of deciding what's best for her family.
I know you're concerned, but it's none of your business.
My only brother was 10 years older than I, and the last time I ever saw him was when I 9, so I think of myself as an only child. As others have said, I don't know anything else, so I don't know if my situation was better or worse than most.
It wasn't until I became an adult, that I realized I was fortunate to be an only child. I have a great imagination, and I'm able to entertain myself. As I look back, I'm happy I didn't have to suffer the noise and drama from other siblings in the house.
Just because you have siblings doesn't mean you'll have a family for life. My husband is on the other spectrum. He is one of 5 kids. Yet, he only talks to one sibling... And that relationship is at best marginal. He might as well be an only child.
I could also attest to that. My husband was an only child and said he enjoyed his childhood immensely. He was close to his parents, had a number of cousins close by ( none of whom he's had contact with for a long time. He was more of an independent soul by nature, and I think he liked his alone time.
I, on the other hand, am one of four children, with an alcoholic, abusive father and an enabling, emotionally abusive mother who saw herself as a perpetual victim saddled with these four kids- and she wasn't shy about letting us know how burdensome we were to her. This situation did nothing to bring us close as siblings, on the other hand, it was every man for himself ( self-preservation, I guess) and our family essentially fell apart as we grew older, my parents went through an acrimonious divorce ( expecting the siblings to take sides), and we children went our separate ways to make lives for ourselves. I also only speak to and maintain a relationship with one sibling- my brother- and our two sisters want nothing to do with any of us and we have no contact with them.
I might as well have been an only child too, as I see it.
I worry about having only one child sometimes, but she seems okay so far. My husband is not from here so all of his family is overseas. My parents retired to the South so they aren't around. I have two sisters but one lives 5000 miles away and the other one works overseas 6 months out of the year. They both have only one child but they are in college. We make sure to keep our daughter busy with camp, playdates, dance, etc. She is very social and making friends is easy for her. Both hubby and I are social and have a good group of close friends that we do stuff with and entertain. Community doesn't necessarily have to be blood relatives.
One of my best friends from the time we were both 14 was a single child being raised by his dad. They had lived in Malibu and then moved near me on the beach in Oxnard. I always loved going to his house as it was quieter and his dad had cool stuff. I came from a home with 8 kids, I was the 2nd of those 8 kids. Funny thing was he loved coming over to my house for exactly the same reasons that I wanted to get away, the noise, the people, always something going on. This friend of mine ended up leaving the area and met a wonderfull little lady in the Inland Empire. They ended up settling in the San Diego area and now have 6 kids of their own. Him and I are still friends.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
