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Well, wanting to prove someone wrong got me off my duff. But once I started succeeding, I didn't care what anyone thought anymore.
I had been stuck in a web of self-doubt , procrastination , and spinelessness.
The person I was "spiting" was someone who threatened to "destroy my life" and was partially successful at doing so.
It's all good. I shouldn't have been so negative anyway.
"A Man Called Pearl" is not the most exciting movie but the guy's initial motivation was his neighbors' critiques of his "sloppy yard". Hmmm he showed 'em.
Rejection, like any social interaction with an unwanted or uncontrolled outcome, can be an unpleasant but powerful tool that can show you a different perspective. It's an advantage. In fact, there's no development without a challenge to the norm. Choosing to dwell on the moments when you were hurt is masochistic at best and counterproductive in the long run. Someone hurt your feelings and you can't get over it. You'll need a notepad cause the list of people that gonna hurt you will just get bigger on your path to success.
A man that studieth revenge, keeps his own wounds green, which otherwise would heal, and do well. Francis Bacon.
Anytime you externalize your goals you'll find yourself in a never-ending vicious cycle of wanting to prove yourself, because essentially you're saying you're not good enough and never will be. As soon as you achieve the results you want, it's never enough. There's always going to be someone smarter than you, richer than you, taller than you, more handsome, more young, more ______ (fill in the blank).
If your motivation to succeed stems from within, and you want financial prosperity from what you feel inside, that's more of a primary reward.
Anytime you set yourself up for conditional rewards, not only are you feeding off your ego/pride, you're allowing others to shape and define you for who you are.
The hugest success comes from a place of calm and inner peace.
Quote:
Originally Posted by samhaina
Rejection, like any social interaction with an unwanted or uncontrolled outcome, can be an unpleasant but powerful tool that can show you a different perspective. It's an advantage. In fact, there's no development without a challenge to the norm. Choosing to dwell on the moments when you were hurt is masochistic at best and counterproductive in the long run. Someone hurt your feelings and you can't get over it. You'll need a notepad cause the list of people that gonna hurt you will just get bigger on your path to success. A man that studieth revenge, keeps his own wounds green, which otherwise would heal, and do well. Francis Bacon.
People do hold grudges and not realizing that this isn't healthy. They feel a sense of satisfaction after "thinking" that what they have achieved are better than those that rejected them. It is technically a way of motivating self to be ahead of others but in reality this is not healthy. Psychologically speaking, you are using someone as a "reason" to achieve more than them instead of "better" yourself. Granted the end result may be the same but the rewarding is different. There is lack of passions and inspirations in "you" hence defining you have a purpose or a goal to achieve. If you mainly achieve something as a way to get back to those who rejected you; then my friend you have problem.
I can understand and relate very well if you use other's successful stories as a motivation to better yourself but not the above.
My g/f's best friend husband has this exact same philosophy. For instance, I was getting a highlander SUV because I have a 9 months baby boy. He on the other hand has no kids but MUST also get an SUV in addition to their two cars. It must be a luxury one (Infiniti) and has to be better than ours (high monthly payment). They said they plan to have kids. He also has a personality of talking down on people which I am trying my best to avoid him at all possible.
I mean... Michael Jordan worked hard with that very same motivation and look at him now. {{{Pauses to see how much Jordan's shoes are selling for now.}}}
Having said that, they probably won't care in the end. If they do, it *might not* be as good as the pleasure you get from your success. Although revenge IS pretty sweet!
A very poor motivator for success because it is inherently negative, subjective, unmeasurable - traits that sabotage success goals. Thoughts of revenge are generally unproductive, time-wasters. It's not really a plan now, is it?
E.g. How does one measure if they have gotten back at people. Where do you find these people and how do you measure whether you've gotten back at them? Based on the looks of jealousy they give? How will you go about announcing your success to these people (in the pretentious, bragging way that could set you up for other failures?). You will be constantly chasing your tail with this method.
I mean... Michael Jordan worked hard with that very same motivation and look at him now. {{{Pauses to see how much Jordan's shoes are selling for now.}}}
Having said that, they probably won't care in the end. If they do, it *might not* be as good as the pleasure you get from your success. Although revenge IS pretty sweet!
Either way, just be sure you are successful!
Why do you think that was his main motivator? Michael Jordan had more measurable goals - putting together a plan to make xx dollars and build an empire, putting in xx amount of training time to make xx team.... He is extremely competitive and self-driven, and pursues success for its own reward.
Why do you think that was his main motivator? Michael Jordan had more measurable goals - putting together a plan to make xx dollars and build an empire, putting in xx amount of training time to make xx team.... He is extremely competitive and self-driven, and pursues success for its own reward.
Oh no no, I don't think it was his main motivator, however he does talk about the coach that cut him all the time. Revenge was absolutely a motivator, however I wouldn't say it was the main one.
In the end, I hope the OP is successful. That's my main concern.
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