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Ok, how about this: Small talk is any non value added chit chat about those topics that everyone mentions but no one really cares about the answer to. How do you like the weather? It's ok, how about you? Fine. Did you hear about Emma's husband's second wife's sister's brother and the first grade teacher? .....
What I consider "small talk" is random conversation that someone (a stranger) strikes up with you as a way to pass the time. e.g., while waiting in line somewhere. It's usually pointless and just a time-filler. I can't stand it.
To me, small talk is any conversation that is shallow and superficial. Examples include, "Have you ever seen so much snow in your life?" "I found the best tuna casserole recipe; my husband just loved it." "Did you see the bracelet that Jeanette was wearing?! I bet it cost at least $600.00!"
Although I don't object to small amounts of it, more than ten minutes, and I am ready to bolt!
It's people trying to make conversation just to be nice, coming off as 2-faced. They don't genuinely care to talk to you, nor are the genuinely interested or have anything of note to talk about, but to be polite-pr showing pity, say they did, etc, they come over and "chit-chat" Usually for me, it's the "What have you been up to" / "What's been going on" things in that ball park. And the people asking don't give a damn I am sure.
Like when I hadn't been to church in a while. 1 lady there, who's known me since I was 9-10. She says she missed me, and wonders where I have been, and what I have been up to. She didn't care. We hardly speak to one another. She was just being nice, or trying to put me on the spot because I hadn't come in a month.
When I was out shopping, I run into an old school mate, who smiles says high and asks what I am up to. Again, we were not friends, or even acquaintances. So again, she didn't care.
So, I hate that, because since we're not close, they have no reason to care what's going on with me, or my life. Now if they like a hairstyle or outfit and wanna ask questions, then I wouldn't call that small talk. it's something of genuine interest.
I hate small talk, and I think I invite it because I am quiet. So people see me keeping to myself and feel sorry for me, or think I am a loser desperate for someone to talk to me. So they wanna come over and chat randomly, or they think I am weird and wanna chat to see how weird or stupid I am for themselves.
I can put my ear-pieces in, and listen to my music and get lost in my own thoughts. But then there's the small talk of "Hey, what are you listening to?" when I am at family functions
"Does it matter, and do you really care" is what I am tempted to say, of course I just fake smile and tell them. lol
Pretty much, even people who are supposed to be your friends don't often care. If you tell them "I'm depressed" to the question "how are you" get ready for them to want to run for the hills. It's so stupid. Sometimes I think I'm the only one but I would never ask that question unless I really mean it or I had to on the job of course.
I really hate it because being the honest person I am I am so tempted to take the question literally so I just say okay I guess with a poker face to those people because that is pretty much not a lie just a way of glorifying the truth.
That's another beauty of music. You can tune out all the meaningless chatter. I think sometimes you don't even have to be listening to music just have the earbuds on and most people won't try to talk to you. Off on a tangent but it's even better for petty complaints. Most often the person complaining illegitimately will assume that people are listening so you get away with it.
Last edited by Nickchick; 03-11-2015 at 02:14 PM..
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