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If anything, having children is one of the most self-centered acts a human can commit. You are forcibly bringing a life into this world.
Exactly. Having kids is incredibly more self-centered than NOT having kids, in more ways than one. Besides forcibly bringing a life into this world for your own selfish purposes and desires, you're also contributing to more resources being used from the earth, and creating more waste, blah blah, the list goes on and on. Childfree people, choosing to not have children, are way less selfish. It's hilariously absurd to me that people call childfree people selfish, when it's actually the other way around.
I understand some people's excitement with children. That's how I feel when I see a puppy or a kitty. I can like some kids if I know them well but for the most part I don't care for them and I don't ask to carry or feed no babies like some women do. No thank you.
I find kids especially annoying when they are crying at a supermarket or running around in stores throwing merchandise on the floor. And who can forget crying children during flights? I do feel bad for the babies but the 3 or 4 year olds? annoying. Now if they are playing or talking to their relatives, I don't mind them but I still don't get excited like when I see a kitty or even a grown cat.
This - all of it! I, too, get excited when I see a kitty, haha. I'm such a cat lover. Kids? Ugh. NO. Shudder.
But, guess what? I don't HAVE to "get" why people like cats. Nor do I have to bash them for having different things in life that they love, even if they're things that don't match my choices, things that I can't personally imagine caring about, myself. You know?
I don't like dogs so I don't have one. Here's a simple solution, don't have kids, avoid them if you can and try to be nice to the kids that you can't avoid. Also, try to remember that you were an annoying kid at one time so cut kids a little slack. Like I said, I don't like dogs but when I visit someone with a dog, I pat the little monster on its head and discreetly shoo it away.
My dogs are behave better in public than most children I run into
I don't want anything bad to happen to kids. In fact, when I hear about tragedies that involve children, I get more upset than if similar things were to happen to adults. My issue isn't that I don't CARE about children, because I do.
What I mean, though, is that I find kids to be annoying. A huge time-suck. A big waste of energy. And I just feel awkward and weird around them. The stuff they care about is nonsensical. When they talk, it's a strain to understand them.
(By the way, I'm 27 years old, have lived with my now-husband for 6 years, have been married for a year, make a comfortable income on my own...just so no one says I'm young and will "grow into it")
It's cool seeing a pic of my cousin's kid on Facebook when she's looking cute, but when she's around me, I would prefer that she interact with other family members.
I really don't like being around children and definitely don't want kids of my own....
Am I weird?
Becoming a teacher really changed my mind about kids. They can be emotionally draining. No matter how "cool" and "engaging" you are, they're going to think that it's all about them, eventually, so work on your interpersonal skills, and learn how to make other people the center of attention. You will need all of your energy to give something good to them one-hundred percent of the time, and it can be quite draining. They also often don't view their actions as their fault and get confused when presented with the concept of accountability.
I will also admit that actually dealing with kids is different than when I was a child. When I was growing up, the adults were in charge, and we had no real say. If we didn't like a decision an adult made we could either take it out on ourselves or other kids, but we couldn't argue with the adult. This generation doesn't really have a concept of that, so teaching is, unfortunately, a lot like being someone's hired servant. I'm appalled, frankly, because I spent all of this time acquiescing to the people over me as a child and now I still have to do it even as an adult! My best advice, though, is ALWAYS interact with kids with your best intentions. They can tell if something is off, because they're narcissistic little monsters for the most part, and pay close attention to the way you react to them. Unfortunately, they pay almost no attention to how they treat other people, so get ready to ignore a lot of really annoying behavior.
Oh, and DON'T be afraid to GIVE ORDERS and ULTIMATIMS. Kids respond surprisingly well to a little firmness and seem to respect those who can take charge and take authority. Being too nice is a great way to get treated like an unwanted slave. Compassion if not tempered with firmness can be mistaken for lack of confidence; kids seem to hate adults who aren't sure of themselves.
Also, try to be as honest and upfront as possible. If you tell a kid you are going to do something, follow through. Never lie or make empty promises. This is a skill that must be practiced carefully.
Yeah, and don't send mixed signals, if it can be avoided. Get on the same page with the parents and the other teachers, and don't let your kids play with you. If they are given certain rules and expectations of behavior at home, make sure they are held to similar standards at school.
I don't want anything bad to happen to kids. In fact, when I hear about tragedies that involve children, I get more upset than if similar things were to happen to adults. My issue isn't that I don't CARE about children, because I do.
What I mean, though, is that I find kids to be annoying. A huge time-suck. A big waste of energy. And I just feel awkward and weird around them. The stuff they care about is nonsensical. When they talk, it's a strain to understand them.
(By the way, I'm 27 years old, have lived with my now-husband for 6 years, have been married for a year, make a comfortable income on my own...just so no one says I'm young and will "grow into it")
It's cool seeing a pic of my cousin's kid on Facebook when she's looking cute, but when she's around me, I would prefer that she interact with other family members.
I really don't like being around children and definitely don't want kids of my own....
Am I weird?
Not weird. You have a lot more empathy for them that I do. It actually bothers me that people grieve more for kids (dome rationalize it's for the parents but same outcome.) And it bothers me that kids can be on the child AND adult transplant list essentially doubling their chances for a transplant while cutting adult changes in half.
Kids can be fun and cure and I feel bad if ANYONE gets hurt or dies. I just don't think they deserve to be treated as a "special/protected class" anymore than those over 60 or so.
Exactly. Having kids is incredibly more self-centered than NOT having kids, in more ways than one. Besides forcibly bringing a life into this world for your own selfish purposes and desires, you're also contributing to more resources being used from the earth, and creating more waste, blah blah, the list goes on and on. Childfree people, choosing to not have children, are way less selfish. It's hilariously absurd to me that people call childfree people selfish, when it's actually the other way around.
Amen. I understand that parents have to rationalize otherwise but seriously?? There is no way around this fact. Just admit to the fact that your actions to replicate your own DNA are selfish and harm the planet. Parents who understand /admit this have a much greater level of respect from me.
Being child free is a great choice for some people. Developing a visceral contempt for humans under a certain age strikes me as peculiar to the point of resembling a phobia, though... How normal would anyone consider it if you held the same views of human beings in a different category? "I hate senior citizens". "I hate people in their 30s". "I hate people who are centenarians".
The next brave new world of lifestyle choices will involve people who declare themselves "senior free". They will purge all elderly people from their lives, move to senior free buildings in senior free neighbourhoods, then complain online about how persecuted they feel for their choice.
It's impossible to be a good parent and be self-centered. Your children become the center of your world, at least for a couple of decades. If you throw all your efforts into parenthood you forego fancy restaurant dates, frequent travels, long bubble baths... You have to juggle soccer schedules, meal times, doctor/dentist appt schedules, school projects, family vacations, music lessons, extra time to help with homework, hopefully church involvement. Time and money slips away and the things YOU want to do no longer seem important. You live for someone else. You would gladly give your own life to save that of your child's. Don't tell me having children is selfish.
Your ultimate goal is producing a fine citizen of our society that will make the world a better place. As it is we are breeding (or not breeding) ourselves out of existence.
I guess, I equate the flip side, for the most part, as being self-centered.
Being child free is a great choice for some people. Developing a visceral contempt for humans under a certain age strikes me as peculiar to the point of resembling a phobia, though... How normal would anyone consider it if you held the same views of human beings in a different category? "I hate senior citizens". "I hate people in their 30s". "I hate people who are centenarians".
The next brave new world of lifestyle choices will involve people who declare themselves "senior free". They will purge all elderly people from their lives, move to senior free buildings in senior free neighbourhoods, then complain online about how persecuted they feel for their choice.
Well,
I, for one, am happy there are actually people out there who see kids for what they are: a tedious chore and a drain on resources. Let us also not forget that they are convenient excuse to be sort of antisocial.
Example:
Do you want to go out and have fun tonight?
No, I have to stay home and take care of the kids.
Don't get me wrong, though, they are great, but it's silly, in my opinion, to expect every one, even every married couple, to have children by a certain age. Let people enjoy their lives. Believe it or not, there are women out there perfectly content to NOT have the responsibility of taking care of babies and children, especially with child protection laws becoming so strict. If I ever have kids, I think I'm going to move to a foreign country where I can do whatever I very well please with my kids without the government trying to stop me...I hope places like that still exist.
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