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Had a co-worker that found out her boyfriend was sleeping with another woman, who happened to be another co-worker. LOL
After she found out her boyfriend was cheating she decided to get revenge on him. She knew that he would sleep with the other co-worker at a little apartment above his shop. So she arrainged to have a friend from another business sleep with her at his shop a couple buildings over.
When she told us this, I asked, "how is this revenge?" She answered, "Because, I cheated on him." I told her, but he does not know that you did it.
Another guy told her that any time she wants to get back at her boy friend that she can call him. I think he offered to help her get back at him right then. LOL
On a side note I know both of the women. They don't work here anymore.
Living a good, fulfilled life despite this person would have been a productive, positive use of time. Weaving elaborate "revenge" plots well into adulthood, though? What's productive or positive about that? You've really let somebody into your head that much all these years?
Living a good, fulfilled life despite this person would have been a productive, positive use of time. Weaving elaborate "revenge" plots well into adulthood, though? What's productive or positive about that? You've really let somebody into your head that much all these years?
I was thinking the same thing. I see people do this on a daily basis. Someone cuts them off on the way to work and they do not stop thinking about it. All day it takes over ruining their day. Some of those people even talk about the person that cut them off here on CDF. I am almost betting though that the person that cut them off had a great day. More than likely they did not mean to do it, it was a mistake. Who knows. Either way only one person had a wasted day.
I can not even imagine a wasted life. 25 years trying to get back at someone that more than likely has forgotten about it.
The only person that can make you happy is you. No one else can do that.
I can understand the OP's situation. I once dated a complete bipolar mess of a woman who stabbed me, cheated on me, stole from me, and did a number on my mental and financial well being. I tried for over a year to "let it go" but had no success. When I found a way to get revenge, I took it... and felt better and was able to move on immediately.
There's just a certain amount of BS that you can take... and when you cross that limit, there's just no "letting it go" anymore, IMO.
That's the only time in my life where revenge was the only thing that ultimately helped. All other cases, living well and being successful has been satisfying enough.
Anyway, even when I think back on the situation 20 years later, I doubt I would have reacted differently if faced with the same situation now.
I feel the same way, OP. I was bullied horribly back in elementary and even middle school, and I still have the desire to get even with all of the bullies, I still remember every last one of them. I'm likely never going to see any of them again though.
I was bullied in junior high a lot, mostly taunts, which didn't really hurt me. But this one kid...he was a sadistic piece of filth who abused me for no reason. I would sit their, quiet, and he would come after me and punch me and I would just freeze up. I think it's because he reminded me of my abusive father and I would just shut down and not be able to defend myself. He once beat me, and I tried to fight him off but he was about, not joking, 80 lbs heavier than me and eight inches taller (I've always been short) and put his belt around my neck and choked me. He said he would actually kill me if I didn't kiss his feet in front of EVERYBODY. I did, I was so scared.
Well, he got kicked out of school and went to another one, and I went on with my life. I heard he did a little jail time for something unrelated and that was that...but it still hurt me. I felt so weak, cowardly, and powerless.
Twenty-five years later, and I was still thinking about him, and those years. My shrink said I should move on and remember I am a different person and all that other feel-good doctor Phil crap. It didn't work. I wanted revenge. I wanted to feel powerful and get back that power that was taken from me, but how?
When I was a child, being abused, living in an awful home situation and treated badly by everyone, what did I want more than anything else? Super powers. And I wanted a group of my own super-friends. If I just had an edge, abilities that could help me fight back. But of course, that was just fantasy...that is, of course, until the rise of the place where people like me can find out how to use the power of technology to destroy someone, ANYONE, and take back my dignity. That was, of course, until the rise of almighty 4chan.
Bliss. Pure. Simple. Bliss.
I felt like a weight had finally been lifted from my shoulders. I was on top at least. Years later, and I was no longer the little victim. David used "0s" and "1s" and a few tricks to slay Goliath.
All the Doctor Phil Woowoo crap the shrinks told me didn't help, but actually doing something did. And best part is...I didn't do anything technically illegal.
My advice to anyone who was ever victimized in such a way that they can't get it out of their system is simple: GET REVENGE. It will heal your wounds and make you a better person. Do what you need to do as long as it doesn't end up biting you in the rear like actually killing someone or physically hurting them. And remember to not forgive, and to not forget. There are over 9,000 ways to make someone pay.
"Revenge is a dish best served cold"-Old Klingon proverb.
I will not say exactly what I did but 1) it was not actually illegal, believe it or not and 2) he never knew it was me. But his life has just gotten a hell of a lot harder thanks to the advice of a bunch of troll-masters who let me know how to mess with people in ways I had never even considered.
Oh, the joys of the internet...
(click this vid, I can't embed, but it is worth it to watch)
Vengeance is the greatest gift in life! Don't let all these limp wrist-ed whining liberals tell you other wise.
For thousands of years Vengeance, and or the threat of revenge is what kept the world civil.
Good for You on finally getting The real closure you were seeking.
Revenge only provides "closure" if there is no retaliation.
Too often it just keeps going on and on with each person feeling they are the victim and that they deserve to get the other person back to even the score. So....NO CLOSURE!
So you're all effed up in the head like he is (or was). Congrats.
Exactly. This is how the cycle of violence perpetuates itself. The guy who bullied you probably also came from a F'd up home where he was abused. So, in order to try to get his power back, he abused the OP. The OP was abused by this guy, so he abuses his abuser. The cycle never ends.
It doesn't always feel good to do the right thing. That doesn't mean it's not the right thing.
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