A friend with schizophrenia and delusions towards me (therapy, people)
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I also had a very good friend who was bipolar. She would get on and off her meds. On her meds, she was great to be around and we enjoyed each other's company and were also there for each other during hard times. But she would not stay on her meds, and frankly, I couldn't deal with her when she was off them. I finally had to cut off all communication with her after begging her to continue treatment, which she refused to do and instead began bulldozing every healthy boundary I tried to put into place.
This is so true. There is so much difficulty with non-compliant patients due to the medications that psychiatrists prescribe. The problem is with the SIDE EFFECTS of anti-psychotic medications. I have seen more men go off their meds due to the fact that they made them impotent. I guess the only good news is that in the past few years, a number of new anti-psychotic meds have been introduced, where the side effects are not as severe. A schizophrenic or bipolar patient can function fairly well to very well on the right medication; although it is far more difficult for bipolar patients than it is for schizophrenics.....
The above bolded part is very true in terms of schizophrenic patients. I had one patient who spent the majority of his time watching videos all the time. He would come into sessions with me and bring the videos that he had rented and watched. Essentially, initially, (for a good long time) working with him meant my talking about, and asking him about each movie: What he thought of it, which ones he liked, what he liked or didn't like about a certain movie. Although talking about movies with a patient doesn't exactly sound like "therapy" to most people, I did so for two reasons: 1) To let him know that I wasn't pressuring him, and was interested and willing to talk about what HE wanted to talk about; and 2) because over time my doing so built up a relationship of trust with him, whereby he eventually began talking about other things in his life....His family, his fears and delusions, etc. --But I HAD to establish that ground of acceptance and trust with him FIRST.
Schizophrenics are oftentimes very insular, and not overly relational. They live in their own world, but with time and patience, one CAN find a "middle ground" whereby relationship IS possible, only different from one's other relationships in life.
The above bolded part is very true in terms of schizophrenic patients. I had one patient who spent the majority of his time watching videos all the time. He would come into sessions with me and bring the videos that he had rented and watched. Essentially, initially, (for a good long time) working with him meant my talking about, and asking him about each movie: What he thought of it, which ones he liked, what he liked or didn't like about a certain movie. Although talking about movies with a patient doesn't exactly sound like "therapy" to most people, I did so for two reasons: 1) To let him know that I wasn't pressuring him, and was interested and willing to talk about what HE wanted to talk about; and 2) because over time my doing so built up a relationship of trust with him, whereby he eventually began talking about other things in his life....His family, his fears and delusions, etc. --But I HAD to establish that ground of acceptance and trust with him FIRST.
Schizophrenics are oftentimes very insular, and not overly relational. They live in their own world, but with time and patience, one CAN find a "middle ground" whereby relationship IS possible, only different from one's other relationships in life.
To the OP: Don't give up!
Take gentle care.
My friend has been reclusive as well. She is very artistic and usually enjoys painting. But during the recent years she has told me how she has some problems with concentration, so she hasn't been able to put focus on painting. Also, reading has been out of the question for her. She has also mentioned something that she isn't really willing to follow news as the bad news terrifies her and she doesn't want to watch tv either. She started going to therapy only around a year ago, so there has been many years she has mainly stayed at home. Then her mom took care of the household tasks, I think. So I wondered myself that how she spent her days at home.
But then there are specific topics that she knows quite a lot about, so when meeting with her I have tried to talk about these. We don't really talk about her disease. Sometimes I try to ask her about her therapy but she is pretty reticent, so I have let it go. But currently within a year she has been much more active, she has even visited some art galleries, cafes and restaurants herself. She even told me which book she is reading currently, and how she enjoys panting again. But then almost two months of not hearing from her, and when meeting her last week, she was like a shadow of herself. Thank you!
My friend's sister sent me some update related to my friend's "current state of mind."
My friend had taken a trip abroad and came back home the other day.
She said that my friend is psychotic and it's a blessing that she even managed to come back home from the trip. She usually sees a therapist twice a month but for a while she has refused to go there at all. :/
Apparently the delusions towards me are still rather strong as she didn't even mention about the trip to me, she isn't in any contact with her sister either. The only person she is now in a regular contact with is her mom, and she now lives with her.
The sister said that her mom is very helpless and not knowing what to do as my friend refuses to take a treatment. My friend thinks that she is doing fine, so obviously you can't force someone to hospital, even if she is psychotic?
I'm not trying to get involved, I'm just sad about her situation. Is it normal to stay at home if you are in a psychosis, or is it prerequisite that her mom should take her to hospital?
Last edited by hereIam88; 01-30-2017 at 05:43 PM..
It sounds like you can still be supportive to her family, even if she is not in a place to be a friend to you right now.
One of my friend's two younger siblings - twins - both have schizophrenia and were diagnosed when they were 17. It is very hard for the family. One of the twins is no longer living at home while the other is a little more stable. Both are great kids, even though both had odd behaviors even when they were younger (one used to bake cookies all the time. Imagine a 10 year old boy who always wants to bring you cookies. It was cute). I remember realizing something was up when we went to a restaurant for their 14th birthday and one of them refused to get out of the car because he didn't want anyone looking at him. He hid his head under his sweater. It was 15 minutes before he decided to come out. It was out of the blue and no one knew what to make of that... or at least, they were not going to discuss it with me if they did.
Personally, I understand a little about the paranoia. I am not schizophrenic but I had an experience of irrational paranoia. I poured some juice, and then a few minutes later I was about to drink it and got an overwhelming sense that someone had poisoned it. I believed this had happened, even though I knew it was impossible. I could not bring myself to drink it because I was sure it was poison. It is hard to describe this state of knowing something isn't true but still believing it, and not feeling in control over that belief. It was a paralyzing split in consciousness. Sort of like being scared of the dark as a child, but dialed up to 10. Eventually I forced myself to drink the juice, telling myself it was not poisoned, but I felt terrified nonetheless - and finally the belief went away. Very strange experience that has happened only once in my 30 years of life, but I won't forget how scared I was. I can only imagine would it would be like living with that kind of experience every single day.
Before I start, I want you to know where I am coming from, so that you can understand my level of understanding of schizophrenia. I minored in Psychology at one of the nation's best universities because of my lifelong interest in psychology. I am not an authority but I believe I know enough to at least consider my opinion.
Schizophrenia is a brain disease, generally inherited, and is generally regarded as incurable. The best most schizophrenics can hope for is drug therapy, and it is the usual schizophrenics regard drug treatment as "the cure is worse than the disease." It is one of the lowest drug compliance rates of all mental disorders.
The prognosis is dismal but if you can find happiness with somebody who suffers this malady then I pray for you and your beloved.
My friend's sister sent me some update related to my friend's "current state of mind."
My friend had taken a trip abroad and came back home the other day.
She said that my friend is psychotic and it's a blessing that she even managed to come back home from the trip. She usually sees a therapist twice a month but for a while she has refused to go there at all. :/
Apparently the delusions towards me are still rather strong as she didn't even mention about the trip to me, she isn't in any contact with her sister either. The only person she is now in a regular contact with is her mom, and she now lives with her.
The sister said that her mom is very helpless and not knowing what to do as my friend refuses to take a treatment. My friend thinks that she is doing fine, so obviously you can't force someone to hospital, even if she is psychotic?
I'm not trying to get involved, I'm just sad about her situation. Is it normal to stay at home if you are in a psychosis, or is it prerequisite that her mom should take her to hospital?
Generally speaking, if your friend won't voluntarily seek treatment, it can't be forced on her if she is not a true danger to herself or others.
As the law told me once about my brother (who did end up eventually getting involuntarily committed) "It's not against the law to be mentally ill."
Before I start, I want you to know where I am coming from, so that you can understand my level of understanding of schizophrenia. I minored in Psychology at one of the nation's best universities because of my lifelong interest in psychology. I am not an authority but I believe I know enough to at least consider my opinion.
Schizophrenia is a brain disease, generally inherited, and is generally regarded as incurable. The best most schizophrenics can hope for is drug therapy, and it is the usual schizophrenics regard drug treatment as "the cure is worse than the disease." It is one of the lowest drug compliance rates of all mental disorders.
The prognosis is dismal but if you can find happiness with somebody who suffers this malady then I pray for you and your beloved.
Her medication was reduced that's why she had been functioning pretty well within the past year but obviously eventually it had worsen her condition, and now she's in a psychosis.
It sounds like you can still be supportive to her family, even if she is not in a place to be a friend to you right now.
One of my friend's two younger siblings - twins - both have schizophrenia and were diagnosed when they were 17. It is very hard for the family. One of the twins is no longer living at home while the other is a little more stable. Both are great kids, even though both had odd behaviors even when they were younger (one used to bake cookies all the time. Imagine a 10 year old boy who always wants to bring you cookies. It was cute). I remember realizing something was up when we went to a restaurant for their 14th birthday and one of them refused to get out of the car because he didn't want anyone looking at him. He hid his head under his sweater. It was 15 minutes before he decided to come out. It was out of the blue and no one knew what to make of that... or at least, they were not going to discuss it with me if they did.
Personally, I understand a little about the paranoia. I am not schizophrenic but I had an experience of irrational paranoia. I poured some juice, and then a few minutes later I was about to drink it and got an overwhelming sense that someone had poisoned it. I believed this had happened, even though I knew it was impossible. I could not bring myself to drink it because I was sure it was poison. It is hard to describe this state of knowing something isn't true but still believing it, and not feeling in control over that belief. It was a paralyzing split in consciousness. Sort of like being scared of the dark as a child, but dialed up to 10. Eventually I forced myself to drink the juice, telling myself it was not poisoned, but I felt terrified nonetheless - and finally the belief went away. Very strange experience that has happened only once in my 30 years of life, but I won't forget how scared I was. I can only imagine would it would be like living with that kind of experience every single day.
Thank you for sharing this. Yes, that must be incredibly hard for the family, having two schizophrenia patients in a family. :/
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